Youri McAnespie

You should've prayed to Allah before bedtime... Not recommended if you've form for following through (and don't own a dog).

I had salt and pepper chips once from a highly recommended chinese chippy in Cumbria - they were fucking fried oven chips, and no birdseye chillies either... Utter shite.

I was just lazily stereotyping - 90% of my southern (non-coast) chippy visits I've probably been so inebriated as to be unaware of moist options and/or of the 'eating is cheating' mindset and present under duress from cheating colleagues. I think most coastal chippies are good.

Cheese and Leek fucking pies, but nowt moist..? Savvern cants. Chippies in the south are invariably crap. Kebab/Pizza/allsorts takeaways that try and do fish and chips are bastards too, location unimportant.

I've only ever ate a chippy sausage once - and that had been bought for the dog. I was still hungry though - I wasn't impressed, reminded me of primary school sausage. I don't get people who get pies from the chippy either.

If you can't smell frying fish from a block away from the chippy it'll be a pollock serving crap chippy...

I Googled "Leyland Booze Buster" and no joy, where is it?

You must have a crap chippy. I enjoy a smaller portion though. A whole portion of chips with a fish is too much imo.

Conceding early so often suggests we aren't doing any homework and our opponents are... J.F.B. IN!

Rick Stein in Bangladesh on Dave Ja Vu now...

I make fish curry in the Indian style a lot, really quick to do. I like fish, chips and peas without curry too. Fish barms an' all - I'll have a scoop of scraps added sometimes and extra Sow-finger.

Saying 'I've no microwave' is basically saying 'I feed my dustbin'... Reheating leftovers any other way is madness. Not reheating at all is sectionable behaviour. Answer this, Esco...When you've wiped your arse do you. A. Pull up your underkeks and strides whilst simultaneously standing up? Or B. Bend over from a standing position and pull your keks/strides up?

Cooked veg can be frozen too - but needs to be in a sauce of some kind. A quick white sauce or tomato sauce. I also use the 1kg bags of frozen mix veg - cauli, broccoli, carrots, french beans...£1 a bag and no prep or wastage. Only for myself mind, wouldn't cheat in company.

He'd shit 'em up, fire a rocket up their arses - perhaps literally?

And he learnded French in about a month.

Extrapolate his Fleetwood record onto our results we'd be three points from the playoff spots. He's a great man manager.

Well technically they do, as everyone knows, 'curry' pretty much means 'gravy' in the former Indian Empire.

How can 160 million Bangladeshis be wrong?

Mash can be overmashed - the carb cells broken down to the point of gloop. Mash making is an art. Freezing mash is good, one can ice-skim water, creating a very light and fluffy mash. Youri Bloomenttall.

Chippy curry sauce on fish and chips? Perfectly acceptable.

Club shop, now. Fish with gravy? Why not just accuse me of being a stand-up wiper and be done with it? I was brought up in a working class family in the 80's - I was one of the aspirational 'hankering for a wok' Miami Vice generation. I rejected my heritage with extreme prejudice. I was cooking for myself from 13ish. I bought my 1st bottle of Beaujolais Nouveau at about 15 from the old Sainsbury's (I was still supping Breaker and Colt45 on Friday street/fairground pissups). Jacques Pepin, Keith, Ken Hom...I used to watch them all. I am an excellent chef. So u

Probably got his liver... I actually worked in catering quite a lot in my twenties (proper catering, not 'fries with that' 😉). It was my fallback job when I got sacked/got bored in other jobs. People slating Crawley for his Pot Noodle butties - I've known top drawer chefs (me too) who ate absolute shite off the clock; Pot Noodles, Ramen, Rustler Burgers, Space Raiders (sometimes on bread), Fray Bentos Pies, Holland's Puddings, Garage Forecourt butties, pastie barms, elephant leg kebabs, Koolios Fried Chicken... The last thing anyone wants to do getting in at 11pm is fuck about c

Hark at all the microwave-less Marco Pierre Whites on here (see what I did there?) I cook 90% from scratch and couldn't do without one. Reheating stuff, especially say pasta or a pilau in the oven or on the hob? Ballache. I like lattes, cappuccinos, cacao - doing milk in a pan = boilovers, caramelised milk welded to the pan. Microwave minute and a half - done. Blanching veg for curries or stews... Steams stuff in a few minutes versus half an hour in a pan or steamer. Loads of uses other than plastic tray crap. I guarantee Marco and Gordon have one at home.

In for now. But I'm thinking he's out of his depth and has bought too much into the Barrow-celona hype. I reckon' he fancies himself as a modern Pep type mixed with an old-school disciplinarian Megson type (running off at h/t) and is neither - more a gilet and glove wearing pretend hard man, in reality not far removed from the pansies on the pitch. We should stick, but hope a certain St. Joseph of Huyton doesn't get snaffled in the interim. Near 40% win record. Sound him out and keep him waiting in the wings, glowing Havana in one fist, cauldron filled with Lobscouse a

Dripping butties made with slices of the national loaf. Refreshed the same pot of loose tea from Saturday with fresh boiling water. Tripe for tea. Gojira Berries? Smoked salmon? Eggs Benedict? Fortnum and Mason? Did you eat your ponce fayre on a table in front of your big window so all the neighbours could see? Some folk should have their 'Northerner' status rescinded, they really should.