RoadRunnerFan Posted September 17, 2016 Share Posted September 17, 2016 I think scriking (skriking?) is about the most Boltonian word in existence. Love it. Top word, don't hear it enough these days. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smiffs Posted September 17, 2016 Share Posted September 17, 2016 Hands up... Who's ever knocked one off over their MIL? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators Zico Posted September 17, 2016 Moderators Share Posted September 17, 2016 Made me chuckle when Liam Gallagher tweeted: Paid for the ex wife and her mum to go to Paris for two weeks. Thats how much I hate the French. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chief wiggum Posted September 18, 2016 Share Posted September 18, 2016 I'll use the word genius for Les Dawson, his lugubrious delivery and brilliant use of language put him head and shoulders above his peers, and as has been rightly pointed out his influence is huge. His mother-in-law jokes were delivered with his tongue fixed firmly in his cheek, he basically subverted the genre. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members bolty58 Posted September 18, 2016 Members Share Posted September 18, 2016 At the risk of sounding like Bernard Manning what's the crack with 'em?! I have a 2 week old baby and each time she's round, which is frequently, she basically insinuates I do fook all - 'well, could he not do this . . . could he not do that . . ?' Bar growing a pair of milking tits I really don't see what else I can do . . . it's getting right on my . . . er . . . tits Is this the norm? 'cos she's going the right way for a massive kick in the fanny if this carries on! To paraphrase a Traf special, they're all cunts. Think they know best when, in my case, they were used to fucking war rations and thought owt with sugar in was a must for kids. Drove my missus fucking potty with it so when the offer came to migrate with work, missus was all for it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BOWTUN BAKED Posted September 18, 2016 Share Posted September 18, 2016 Mother in law Woman Hitler! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
madthatter Posted September 18, 2016 Author Share Posted September 18, 2016 Mother in law Woman Hitler! Very good Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jules_darby Posted September 18, 2016 Share Posted September 18, 2016 Mines nice as pie But she's a fucking worrier / mitherer Always wants to chip in Repeats stuff over and over again And always turns up way early for stuff Will only ever go to the restaurant at the end of her road at 6pm Sounds bad but I wonder if I'd actually prefer a dragon? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Site Supporter Tonge moor green jacket Posted September 18, 2016 Site Supporter Share Posted September 18, 2016 Mines ace. Can talk for Britain but that's a small price to pay. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kent_white Posted September 18, 2016 Share Posted September 18, 2016 Mine's alright but if you take her out for something to eat she takes an hour choosing what she wants. She'll read every option out loud and then discuss it's relative merits before whittling it down to about 3 and applying further critique. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gonk Posted September 18, 2016 Share Posted September 18, 2016 Wife of 26 years and her mother fell out before I met the wife, so I've never ever met mine Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members bolton_blondie Posted September 18, 2016 Members Share Posted September 18, 2016 Maje (my other half) is shit scared of my Mam. She's not a full shillin' ???? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gonzo Posted September 18, 2016 Share Posted September 18, 2016 I think any woman over the age of 55 is clinically insane by some degree or other. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members bolty58 Posted September 19, 2016 Members Share Posted September 19, 2016 I think any woman over the age of 55 is clinically insane by some degree or other. Spot on. That menopause shite turns em into loathsome fuckers at times. "If you didn't have that between your legs, I wouldn't fucking feed you" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
no balls Posted September 19, 2016 Share Posted September 19, 2016 Men might not bleed but they have their own version of rag week, don't kid yourselves you don't Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Site Supporter Tonge moor green jacket Posted September 19, 2016 Site Supporter Share Posted September 19, 2016 That's why we have football. The last sanctuary for the married man. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gonzo Posted September 19, 2016 Share Posted September 19, 2016 Men might not bleed but they have their own version of rag week, don't kid yourselves you don't Tuesday is my worst day after a heavy weekend. I'm either on the verge of stabbing someone or bursting in to tears. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pablo Posted September 19, 2016 Share Posted September 19, 2016 Anyone who thinks their Mum being ace, will make them a top mother in-law, are deluded. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
madthatter Posted September 19, 2016 Author Share Posted September 19, 2016 Men might not bleed but they have their own version of rag week, don't kid yourselves you don't Full moon . . . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Faustus Posted September 19, 2016 Share Posted September 19, 2016 both my inlaws are smarmy uber c#nts... forever telling the kids to ask their mum despite me being a matter of feet away- forever 'noooo daddy'. f#cking know it alls, but numb as f#ck; Brentford is in Essex, a 15 year old bottle of whiskey that has been on his shelf for ten years is a 25 year old malt... passively aggressive too- ashamed to say I was ironing one or two garments, much to her amusement and delight. this turns into them berating each other at my expense- 'eh look, Dave can iron- why cant you?' can he do the electrics, plumbing, diy- no. meanwhile I want them to just f#ck off anywhere they like to think they are poor Yorkshire folk done good, arrogance oozing in their voice, with their second home and early retirement plans... yet 15 years ago he was given a car after his proton exploded any little in vogue past time they have to be the masters of; yankee candles, poker, cheese boards, card making... always keeping up with the jones's- I get a kindle, he gets a firestick, I get a tv, he gets a bigger one... I took youngest to his first Salford match, he and his bother in law tagged along on a freebie and kept his hands in his pockets whilst I got the beers in. the c#nt then starts cheering for the opposition, and tries to get young un to do the same. fast forward 12 months and he is now Salford's biggest fan, with every shirt under the sun... I genuinely could go one... one of those guys if you say you need something, he will argue the toss starts his response with 'noo' f#ck off, just f#ck off other than that they're fine Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
frank_spencer Posted September 19, 2016 Share Posted September 19, 2016 I know that my mum drives the missus to distraction with her fussing. Her parents are forever making sly digs that get her worked up, they've been making sly digs at me since we started dating I think I tuned em out about 10yr ago. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Youri McAnespie Posted September 19, 2016 Share Posted September 19, 2016 What's wrong with British candles an' all? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
no balls Posted September 19, 2016 Share Posted September 19, 2016 both my inlaws are smarmy uber c#nts... forever telling the kids to ask their mum despite me being a matter of feet away- forever 'noooo daddy'. f#cking know it alls, but numb as f#ck; Brentford is in Essex, a 15 year old bottle of whiskey that has been on his shelf for ten years is a 25 year old malt... passively aggressive too- ashamed to say I was ironing one or two garments, much to her amusement and delight. this turns into them berating each other at my expense- 'eh look, Dave can iron- why cant you?' can he do the electrics, plumbing, diy- no. meanwhile I want them to just f#ck off anywhere they like to think they are poor Yorkshire folk done good, arrogance oozing in their voice, with their second home and early retirement plans... yet 15 years ago he was given a car after his proton exploded any little in vogue past time they have to be the masters of; yankee candles, poker, cheese boards, card making... always keeping up with the jones's- I get a kindle, he gets a firestick, I get a tv, he gets a bigger one... I took youngest to his first Salford match, he and his bother in law tagged along on a freebie and kept his hands in his pockets whilst I got the beers in. the c#nt then starts cheering for the opposition, and tries to get young un to do the same. fast forward 12 months and he is now Salford's biggest fan, with every shirt under the sun... I genuinely could go one... one of those guys if you say you need something, he will argue the toss starts his response with 'noo' f#ck off, just f#ck off other than that they're fine they're getting their woods and fords mixed up. Easy done to be fair Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matt Lofthouse Posted September 19, 2016 Share Posted September 19, 2016 Mine lives in Scotland which prevents any unexpected visits and when they do bother I make sure I'm out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tomski Posted September 19, 2016 Share Posted September 19, 2016 Don't mind my one. We keep the visits to a minimum though. Anymore may change my opinion. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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