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Dr Faustus

England is mine, it owes me a living

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I'm still ill... 

Was in Faro at the weekend, and I've not eaten anything since Sunday. Spewed my ring all day Monday, and as I told Roy, I could shit through the eye of a needle. I feel like my ribs and kidneys have been twatted with a lump hammer. I think my headache is due to dehydration, dunno about the shivers and cold sweats though. Took some paracetamol and ibuprofen to counteract the headache, and I was tripping my nuts off, and not in a good way. 

I feel about 30% human... What the fuck is wrong with me, and how long does it last? Work wont allow me in until I'm keeping food in for 24 hours. I think it's longest I've ever gone without food, and a good few years since I've been booze free for this length. 

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10 minutes ago, Dr Faustus said:

I'm still ill... 

Was in Faro at the weekend, and I've not eaten anything since Sunday. Spewed my ring all day Monday, and as I told Roy, I could shit through the eye of a needle. I feel like my ribs and kidneys have been twatted with a lump hammer. I think my headache is due to dehydration, dunno about the shivers and cold sweats though. Took some paracetamol and ibuprofen to counteract the headache, and I was tripping my nuts off, and not in a good way. 

I feel about 30% human... What the fuck is wrong with me, and how long does it last? Work wont allow me in until I'm keeping food in for 24 hours. I think it's longest I've ever gone without food, and a good few years since I've been booze free for this length. 

I was like that 2 years ago on holiday, took me a week to recover, even the area round my eyes swelled up. Don't worry, just drink loads of water.

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21 minutes ago, Tonge moor green jacket said:

Dioralyte?

Ring you gp. Can always cancel the appointment if you're better by it's due time.

serious, dont go to the gp, nowt they can do

any rehydration potion is what he needs

 

what you suggested, rehydrat, immodium

 

try some or all

but a gp aint sorting it out and theyve got enough to do

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1 hour ago, Casino said:

serious, dont go to the gp, nowt they can do

any rehydration potion is what he needs

 

what you suggested, rehydrat, immodium

 

try some or all

but a gp aint sorting it out and theyve got enough to do

What if it was something more serious though?

These medications almost always tell you to go to your gp if symptoms persist for more than a few days

If it's eased by Friday he cancels it. Nothing wasted.

If it's still bad aids or something then surely he should get checked?

I know where you're coming from wrt to services and the pressure they're under, but he has to make sure he's ok and not do the usual bloke thing and ignore it.

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Tell them you want to go to the 'walk in clinic' at waters meeting. Or ring BARDOC on 0161 763 8940. Manchester number but a Bolton service. They'll triage you and get you an appointment straight away if you need one. Don't fuck about with a possible kidney infection. Have you got a temp?

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1 minute ago, kent_white said:

Tell them you want to go to the 'walk in clinic' at waters meeting. Or ring BARDOC on 0161 763 8940. Manchester number but a Bolton service. They'll triage you and get you an appointment straight away if you need one. Don't fuck about with a possible kidney infection. Have you got a temp?

Nurse Kent - and by association WanderersWays - has got you covered.

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I had a pain in my back and couldn't breathe without it hurting back in May. Did the usual male combination of painkillers, booze & ignorance for a few days, then our Maud made me go to the walk-in at Kendal.

Ended up being shipped to Lancaster Royal where I was diagnosed with pneumonia and got a bollocking off the nurses for leaving it.

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I always thought immodium and it's like were best avoided and only to be used if you had to travel?  Every trip to the bog is your bodies attempt to get rid of what's been lurking in there and immodium just bungs you up temporarily?

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8 minutes ago, Duck Egg said:

I always thought immodium and it's like were best avoided and only to be used if you had to travel?  Every trip to the bog is your bodies attempt to get rid of what's been lurking in there and immodium just bungs you up temporarily?

Exactly 

go with the flow

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1 hour ago, Traf said:

I had a pain in my back and couldn't breathe without it hurting back in May. Did the usual male combination of painkillers, booze & ignorance for a few days, then our Maud made me go to the walk-in at Kendal.

Ended up being shipped to Lancaster Royal where I was diagnosed with pneumonia and got a bollocking off the nurses for leaving it.

Moved house a few years ago and it pissed it down putting stuff in the van in the middle of December. Didn’t bother to get changed until later that night, woke up with a cough and just left it for days, got rushed to hospital diagnosed with pleurisy and pneumonia, which was nice.

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1 minute ago, Rudy’s Message said:

Moved house a few years ago and it pissed it down putting stuff in the van in the middle of December. Didn’t bother to get changed until later that night, woke up with a cough and just left it for days, got rushed to hospital diagnosed with pleurisy and pneumonia, which was nice.

I'd been to Krakow for 4 days a month earlier on a stag trip and it pissed don all the time. Came home with a cold which then degenerated apparently.

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1 hour ago, Traf said:

I had a pain in my back and couldn't breathe without it hurting back in May. Did the usual male combination of painkillers, booze & ignorance for a few days, then our Maud made me go to the walk-in at Kendal.

Ended up being shipped to Lancaster Royal where I was diagnosed with pneumonia and got a bollocking off the nurses for leaving it.

Pretty much how I found out I had a collapsed lung.

Thought I'd just tweaked something in my shoulders turns out my lung looked like a crumpled up paper bag.

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How many wanks you had?

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7 minutes ago, gonzo said:

How many wanks you had?

Today or ever? 

2 hours ago, kent_white said:

Tell them you want to go to the 'walk in clinic' at waters meeting. Or ring BARDOC on 0161 763 8940. Manchester number but a Bolton service. They'll triage you and get you an appointment straight away if you need one. Don't fuck about with a possible kidney infection. Have you got a temp?

If I'm off any longer the gaffer will get a temp 😊

 

No temp, just aching and can't keep owt in. Had a rehydration sachet, so set his I get on. I'm an LH lad, would BARDOC help? 

 

Cheers

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3 minutes ago, Dr Faustus said:

Today or ever? 

If I'm off any longer the gaffer will get a temp 😊

 

No temp, just aching and can't keep owt in. Had a rehydration sachet, so set his I get on. I'm an LH lad, would BARDOC help? 

 

Cheers

That's what BARDOC is there for. Don't worry they won't see unless they think you're poorly enough! :) But if you're worried - give them a bell.

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I know it seems obvious & i feel slightly foolish asking, but you have tried throwing yourself down the stairs haven't you ?

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7 minutes ago, Dr Faustus said:

Today or ever? 

 

 

Well if you can manage two wanks a day you’re not properly ill imo. 

 

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5 minutes ago, gonzo said:

Well if you can manage two wanks a day you’re not properly ill imo. 

 

Cheers Doc

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3 hours ago, kent_white said:

Tell them you want to go to the 'walk in clinic' at waters meeting. Or ring BARDOC on 0161 763 8940. Manchester number but a Bolton service. They'll triage you and get you an appointment straight away if you need one. Don't fuck about with a possible kidney infection. Have you got a temp?

Points

There isn't a walk in at waters meeting...been shut for 3 years

BARDOC is no better than ringing your own GP

You won't get an immediate appointment for squits

If he needs his arse wiping then he can  go to his GP

Why do you think he's got a kidney infection based on what he's told us?

 

 

 

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6 hours ago, Dr Faustus said:

I'm still ill... 

Was in Faro at the weekend, and I've not eaten anything since Sunday. Spewed my ring all day Monday, and as I told Roy, I could shit through the eye of a needle. I feel like my ribs and kidneys have been twatted with a lump hammer. I think my headache is due to dehydration, dunno about the shivers and cold sweats though. Took some paracetamol and ibuprofen to counteract the headache, and I was tripping my nuts off, and not in a good way. 

I feel about 30% human... What the fuck is wrong with me, and how long does it last? Work wont allow me in until I'm keeping food in for 24 hours. I think it's longest I've ever gone without food, and a good few years since I've been booze free for this length. 

Sounds like:

 

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This time of year. Every year. Since the dawn of time. It’s the RSV virus. I used to work with premature babies on the neonatal units. It hospitalises them, clogs their lungs up and can potentially kill them.  Grown adults. It’s a cold-like virus. It won’t kill you. It may cause a gastric upset. I shat through the eye of a needle the last day and on my return from the Dom Rep and sneezed and sniffed like I was withdrawing from a massive coke habit. Drank gallons of water, ate nowt for a couple of days and had a load of Imodium. Job done.

Imodium. I used to avoid it thinking better out than in. No!! I’m simple terms, if you’re eating/drinking and it’s straight out the other end your gut is like a cement mixer. Imodium stops it churning and absorbs the water and stops you ejecting everything. Actually better for you. Helps stop the dehydration.

Or ignore all of the above and try the bloon/stairs method

 

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3 hours ago, Casino said:

Points

There isn't a walk in at waters meeting...been shut for 3 years

BARDOC is no better than ringing your own GP

You won't get an immediate appointment for squits

If he needs his arse wiping then he can  go to his GP

Why do you think he's got a kidney infection based on what he's told us?

 

 

 

I don't think he's got a kidney infection. I said he's 'possibly' got a kidney infection because he's got pain there and reports feeling 'trippy'. Could be food poisoning or something similar - but I'd want to get kidney pain checked. If it was me like.

You're right - there is no longer a 'walk in' at Waters Meeting. It's by appointment now but that's what it's known as colloquially. Same service is available at the hospital.

BARDOC would be a better shout than your GP for the reasons I have earlier. You'll get triaged by a clinician and they'll see you same night if they're concerned. 

Doesn't sound like RSV to me. No cold symptoms/sore throat etc?

Either way - I hope you're feeling better soon!

 

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