Pet Bereavement

[Farnywhite]

My Dog died today unexpectedly absolutely gutted . To make it worse I wasn’t there and my kids had to deal with it .
This is the worst I have ever felt and if I try to talk about it just well up . I know it’s not suppose to be the manly thing to do but anyone else been in the same position ? 

[Burndens Bogs]

That’s terrible, you have to try and stay strong for the kids who have probably just had the worst day of their lives. There’s quite a bit on the ‘feeling low’ thread about pet bereavement. Sorry for your loss.

[barryk32]

I took my dog for his final trip to the vets a number of years ago.

As a large bloke with a shaved head and scarred knuckles I sat on the floor with him in the waiting area and sobbed.

Not a single person judged.  All I received was knowing nods and sympathetic smiles.

The 'manly' thing is to be incredibly upset about losing your best mate.

 

 

[Dimron]

14 minutes ago, Farnywhite said:

My Dog died today unexpectedly absolutely gutted . To make it worse I wasn’t there and my kids had to deal with it .
This is the worst I have ever felt and if I try to talk about it just well up . I know it’s not suppose to be the manly thing to do but anyone else been in the same position ? 

Hi Mate, I feel for you.

I lost my buddy four weeks ago... he was acting out of sorts and wham... cancer diagnosis and he was gone in three weeks.

My voice still cracks now if I talk about it. 

Been through it twice before, all I can say is the old adage "time is the great healer". Nothing is the same without him around.

I know I'll do it all again, try to think about the good times and the fun you've had together is the only advice I can offer.

All the best 

Dimron

 

 

[Spider]

It’s the pits. The absolute pits.

They utterly adore you and are your best mate for their time on earth. Seriously. No-one in your family will give you the same greeting of unfettered joy every single time like your dog does.

Cry your fucking eyes out. I did.

[Tonge moor green jacket]

Aye. Don't stop your emotions, you're entitled to them.

It's shit and there's nowt wrong with sharing your grief with your family. Deal with it together, enjoy photos and stories etc.

Sympathies.

[Biggish Dave]

No shame at all in crying over the loss of a pet. They are almost like children, need looking after, have to plan around them etc.

I’ll be distraught when our hound has had her time. Hopefully be some way off yet

[Farnywhite]

Thanks for the kind words.

It’s odd how empty the house feels without her already . I keep wandering about the house been for a walk been to bed tried to watch the telly can’t settle . 
Brought her to the house as a pup 8 and half years ago and became the centre of the family . Growing up with the kids whilst they were at primary school . Holidays and outings ending up planned round her think the only form of transport she never went on was a plane . 
she never liked being on her own so if we were all out had to arrange for her to be taken to relatives . 
just feel incredibly guilty I wasn’t there at the end for her couldn’t get back in time 

[Tonge moor green jacket]

I was going to post about that empty feeling, but thought better of it.

But yes, it's definitely real.

Only natural you'll feel guilty, but don't beat yourself up over it.

Give yourself some time, and then maybe talk through with the kids what you'd like to do with the ashes- whether that's keeping them, scattering them somewhere, planting a tree or whatever. Sort of feels you're still doing the right thing by her.

When we lost our old lurcher, we had chosen to have him euthanized at home.

Might sound daft, but there was no way I was letting the vet carry him to the boot of his car- it was the last thing I could do for the big fella, and a last goodbye.

[bolton_blondie]

Oh for fucks sake. Don't do this to a heavily pregnant woman. Fucking cry. Let it out. They are your family. Don't ever be embarassed or ashamed x

[Burndens Bogs]

Said it before on here, but only another dog owner who has been through a similar thing can fully understand how you are feeling right now - bereft. Non dog owners tend to think think we’re a bit menkul getting upset over a dog, but the pain and sense of loss is very very real, but it does get better after time.

Edited July 5, 2021 by Burndens Bogs

[Rudy]

Let it out Farny

My dog died a few weeks ago and it hit me like a mike Tyson right hook. Couldn’t quite believe it, in the space of a few days he was diagnosed and cremated. 
 

They’re a part of your family, always there, my best friend and just went. I fee for you Farny. Keep your head up luv x

[Farnywhite]

Thanks for everyone’s advice and experiences of being in the same position I have read every post more than once .  And will take all the advice on board . 
It’s still to raw to talk about verbally without crying and not being able to get my words out so to be able to post on here has been a great help I don’t do Facebook or other social media platforms . So thanks 🙏 

[Spider]

1 hour ago, Farnywhite said:

Thanks for everyone’s advice and experiences of being in the same position I have read every post more than once .  And will take all the advice on board . 
It’s still to raw to talk about verbally without crying and not being able to get my words out so to be able to post on here has been a great help I don’t do Facebook or other social media platforms . So thanks 🙏 

Further down the line, you’ll want to do something as a permanent memorial.

We spread our dog’s ashes up near the Pike, as we walked him up there most days and he loved it. The kids also painted some smallish rocks with his name on and left them in a secluded spot up there so that whenever we go up, they know there’s a little reminder for them. It’s genuinely comforting once the initial shock wears off.

Obviously, do your own thing, but it’s nice to have something like that to visit.

[FrancisFogarty]

We as a family have never had a dog until our daughter got one. I must admit I couldn't see what all the fuss was about but now WtD (Wilf the Dog) has eased me into a retirement I was dreading, made it easier to get the exercise I wasn't getting and generally he's a lovely little chap to be around.

Now I find myself dreading the day we haven't got him any more, and how my wife and daughter will cope more than myself.

I realise now the benefits a small furry quadruped gives to a group of humans and you have all my sympathy Farny.

I must clean this keypad. There's a bit of grit blown up into my eye.

[Burndens Bogs]

My oldest dog is nearly 14 and has a few age related problems. Three weeks ago i actually rang the vets and booked her in for the fatal jab, because she’d been looking like she’d had enough. Not long after my call to the vets she started strutting about with a renewed spring in her step & was wolfing her food down with new found enthusiasm. After giving it a lot of thought i rang the vets & cancelled her “final appointment” -  In other words i bottled it.

[Rudy]

11 minutes ago, Francis Fogarty said:

We as a family have never had a dog until our daughter got one. I must admit I couldn't see what all the fuss was about but now WtD (Wilf the Dog) has eased me into a retirement I was dreading, made it easier to get the exercise I wasn't getting and generally he's a lovely little chap to be around.

Now I find myself dreading the day we haven't got him any more, and how my wife and daughter will cope more than myself.

I realise now the benefits a small furry quadruped gives to a group of humans and you have all my sympathy Farny.

I must clean this keypad. There's a bit of grit blown up into my eye.

I know it might sound cold to say Franny but when my dog died I thought about getting another one straight away, I have a pup who’s about 1 and daft as a brush but I loved having two. My daughter starts school this September so going to wait until she’s transitioned well then I’m getting a lab, I know that’s not for everyone but it is for me and I know other people who have done that as well 

[MickyD]

37 minutes ago, Burndens Bogs said:

My oldest dog is nearly 14 and has a few age related problems. Three weeks ago i actually rang the vets and booked her in for the fatal jab, because she’d been looking like she’d had enough. Not long after my call to the vets she started strutting about with a renewed spring in her step & was wolfing her food down with new found enthusiasm. After giving it a lot of thought i rang the vets & cancelled her “final appointment” -  In other words i bottled it.

Happen your dog was listening in. “Final appointment, fuck off, I’m not that Ill. Look, I’m wagging my tail!”  

[bolton_blondie]

Anyone is more than welcome to borrow my Buddy (Mr Bud Bud) He's a knobhead but walks for miles and loves everyone who gives him a treat 👍

[Burndens Bogs]

1 hour ago, MickyD said:

Happen your dog was listening in. “Final appointment, fuck off, I’m not that Ill. Look, I’m wagging my tail!”  

Exactly 😂

[Tonge moor green jacket]

My 3 are still nobheads at times. All in their own way. Just turned 4, and calmed down to an extent, but I'm not sure that they’ll ever grow up.

[H]

Including my childhood I have had dogs for over 65 years.

My wife and girls have shown and bred dogs for over 40 years.

It goes without saying that we have many deaths and believe me it doesn't get any easier.

[leigh white]

I was plaguing an old girlfriends border collie and winding it up, an hour later was having a kip on the couch, and It spied It's chance and bit my foot.☺️

[Dimron]

7 hours ago, Spider said:

Further down the line, you’ll want to do something as a permanent memorial.

We spread our dog’s ashes up near the Pike, as we walked him up there most days and he loved it. The kids also painted some smallish rocks with his name on and left them in a secluded spot up there so that whenever we go up, they know there’s a little reminder for them. It’s genuinely comforting once the initial shock wears off.

Obviously, do your own thing, but it’s nice to have something like that to visit.

We have scattered our dogs' ashes on a particular beach... we can walk along and say "Hello Guinness" at one spot where we used to play football, "Hello Missy" where we used to doss and watch the sunset together and shortly it will be "Hello Bongo" where we only recently played ball (he is my avatar chasing his ball last October)

[Duck Egg]

Got our first dog in 2003.  Rescue dog who'd had a poor start in life, all sorts of behavioural issues and quirks but in no time he became our absolute world and we became his.  Taking him to the vets for that last journey, where I had to carry him in and out of the car just broke me.  I'm filling up just typing this as I remember it.

We got over it by volunteering at Bleakholt then 8 months later got our current chap, who's loved just as much the last.

Best wishes Farny.

Dogs are ace.

Edited July 6, 2021 by Duck Egg