Bea Smith

Does it have to be a postcard? Can't i use a cut out bit of a cereal box?

Its a times like this im grateful that i can work from home and use leg power. I dont even use a tank a month. But perhaps i should still PANIC

Because it takes 99 seconds to demolish one? Havn't got a clue, always assumed it was because of the 99 pence but have never really thought how long they have been in existence. To be fair i just ate them.

You could just boot the Duck sized Horses out of the way, im a bit scared of the beak of a Horse sized Duck. Do we get a choice of weapons thrown in with this question?

Is it wrong that this made me laugh? Does she dress you up?

Evidently some do. They are obviously wrong though. Why didnt you mock them??

Widders, you can go in the miggul of us. I am in for the WW piss up. Its worth it to play 'how long will it take in minutes to peel your feet off the tower lounge floor' And BCG NB, i did the same thing, its a nob thing!

Including the Cuban heel?

Its not just about what the girls look like though is it, its their awareness levels too. I think 7/8 should be the cut off point regardless of their development. And yes NB, i bet it was horrid!

Hindsight is a glorious thing. Bloody useless when you need it at the time and not years later though!

I think its usually 7/8. I do recall that around that point my eldest no longer came into the female changing rooms with me. And frankly, you shouldve gone to reception and complained (obviously when dressed) Now they wont know which idiot is taking his kids in there. Writing a letter after the event is not always the best approach. A Member of staff couldve gone in immediately and dealt with the issue. That said, please do write in/see a manger in person. It has to be noted that there are concerns.

I wouldve wrapped the cord round your neck for getting pissed so close to due date. But im a meanie Alls well that ends well though, at least you got there in the end. :-)

I'll set them up ....

You will look back on this one day Ryan and shake your head at yourself. Actually thats bollocks isnt it

We love it, its ace when BCG goes to the Newsagents and knocks on at 5am to water pistol me in the face when she has been drinking antifreeeze.

and upturned plugs. Holy Moly thats 'orrible

Them block pavers are in business up here!

and stubbing your toe

Anewman with a gun, oh for Gods sake, the streets would be strewn with dead folk. He got to the cash machine first She has a better car than me The reasons would be endless. If you shot everyone you complained about/disliked there'd be no folk left. Probably make a good movie though.

'if you carry on doing that while im driving you selfish bastards i shall put the aircon on and it will be like a snow storm!'

Widders, you do realise that your outings with the girls are going to become painful now dont you? But if you must insist on kicking NB in the cunt, please do so with a patent winklepicker. That will be all.

We live in a triangle, NB/BCG/Bea , thats why stuff goes wrong/goes missing, its the Bermuda triangle of Horwich.

Nice wine on special offer at Sainsburies last week, shouldve bought some. Never prolong an agony/dont flog a dead horse. The horse is dead and thats that. Its not suddenly going to become a foal again. Send it to the glue factory straight away. Ride a new horse.

Telephones and personal meetings were made for private Co-parenting discussions. NOT public internet forums. RIP to all those taken in this terrible accident.

Sad irony that they crased into the emergency exit, the signs above that door show it was an escape route