Gary Speed

[SatanGreavsie]

1:50 into this; shows how much he meant

 

[tshape]

Moving piece on Football Focus then. 

[Tonge moor green jacket]

3 minutes ago, tshape said:

Moving piece on Football Focus then. 

It was indeed. Walker is clearly still affected by it.

Sounds daft, but after reading that article about his family ten years on, then watching it, you just want to reach back in time, grab him, and stop him.

Still a shocker.

[tshape]

12 minutes ago, Tonge moor green jacket said:

It was indeed. Walker is clearly still affected by it.

Sounds daft, but after reading that article about his family ten years on, then watching it, you just want to reach back in time, grab him, and stop him.

Still a shocker.

Spot on. Mad watching him on there and looking at his eyes and wondering if he knew at that moment what he was going to do when he got home.

Edited November 27, 2021 by tshape

[Tonge moor green jacket]

5 hours ago, tshape said:

Spot on. Mad watching him on there and looking at his eyes and wondering if he knew at that moment what he was going to do when he got home.

Absolutely. I remember at the time, when they showed him being on the TV after his passing, doing exactly as you say. Analysing his body language, and looking at his eyes.

Clip today, that was before the programme, showed him chatting and smiling with a camera man.

Was he putting a brave face on- impossible to tell, but having been on that path myself, it brings tears to my eyes when I see him and think "there but for the grace of God go I".

Maybe because it's also the same time that my dad went in for his hip replacement, and never came home, that it is so poignant. 

Edited November 27, 2021 by Tonge moor green jacket

[Cheese]

8 hours ago, tshape said:

Moving piece on Football Focus then. 

Today's tribute on 6 minutes was very touching too.

[marple whites]

Great looking bloke, superb career, loving family - just can’t comprehend.

live for today......

you just don’t know......

[Krimzon]

1 hour ago, marple whites said:

Great looking bloke, superb career, loving family - just can’t comprehend.

live for today......

you just don’t know......

Totally ..

 

Had it all , personally , physically, professionally seemed everything was aligned for him .

Met him great guy , genuinely choked when I heard , all i could think of was why ? 
I have my own theory and ive had experience with this unfortunately , and to not leave a note is rare . In my limited experience some people who choose that course of action have their best day , the day before as nothing holds any fear anymore . 

I idolised the guy , I think his wife has authorised a book but there are no answers.

Remember speaking to Ivan Campo briefly and he just refers to Gary Speed as "My Captain" .. almost like it would hurt to say his name.  

Fuck !  10 years !!!

[mr_disco]

I am not a football player. If there was a button I would have pressed it a long, long time ago. It's really hard living with depression. I take medication and they help. I love Bolton Wanderers. But I do not like life. I lurk on here because it gives me a sense of chat, which I don't have in my life. I read your lives and they make me smile. Your take on life is beautiful, filthy and abhorrent sometimes but it keeps me going. I love you all xx

 

[Burndens Bogs]

1 hour ago, mr_disco said:

I am not a football player. If there was a button I would have pressed it a long, long time ago. It's really hard living with depression. I take medication and they help. I love Bolton Wanderers. But I do not like life. I lurk on here because it gives me a sense of chat, which I don't have in my life. I read your lives and they make me smile. Your take on life is beautiful, filthy and abhorrent sometimes but it keeps me going. I love you all xx

 

Try & meet some of the lads off here if you can, especially the away days.

My owd fella suffered from depression and it’s a grim illness for sure, but there is more help than there used to be and there perhaps isn’t the stigma that there was from days of old.

Stay strong mate there is plenty of help available.

 

Edited November 28, 2021 by Burndens Bogs

[desperado]

5 hours ago, mr_disco said:

I am not a football player. If there was a button I would have pressed it a long, long time ago. It's really hard living with depression. I take medication and they help. I love Bolton Wanderers. But I do not like life. I lurk on here because it gives me a sense of chat, which I don't have in my life. I read your lives and they make me smile. Your take on life is beautiful, filthy and abhorrent sometimes but it keeps me going. I love you all xx

 

You’ve spoke out pal which is half the battle, keep talking, there’s plenty who will listen and talk on here.

I’m no expert in this area whatsoever but I try to take joy from the simple things in life; fresh air, sunsets, laughter, exercise, friends, family and of course bwfc which is why we are all on here. Life’s far from perfect but there’s always enough to live for.

 

[RONNIE PHILLIPS]

6 hours ago, mr_disco said:

I am not a football player. If there was a button I would have pressed it a long, long time ago. It's really hard living with depression. I take medication and they help. I love Bolton Wanderers. But I do not like life. I lurk on here because it gives me a sense of chat, which I don't have in my life. I read your lives and they make me smile. Your take on life is beautiful, filthy and abhorrent sometimes but it keeps me going. I love you all xx

 

It'd be nice if you became less of a lurker & more active on here. I know some shit gets said but people on here can be fantastic when one of us (which you certainly are) need back up whether it be lending an ear or contributing to charitable causes. 

     Hope to hear more from you going forward Disco 👍

[MickyD]

Ditto to all the stuff already said.

The difficult bit is the first admittance you live with MH issues. That done,  stick with what you enjoy and reach out as often as you need. There's always a listening ear and more importantly,  an understanding one.

[athywhite1958]

8 hours ago, mr_disco said:

I am not a football player. If there was a button I would have pressed it a long, long time ago. It's really hard living with depression. I take medication and they help. I love Bolton Wanderers. But I do not like life. I lurk on here because it gives me a sense of chat, which I don't have in my life. I read your lives and they make me smile. Your take on life is beautiful, filthy and abhorrent sometimes but it keeps me going. I love you all xx

 

If you are local try going to the Vulcan on Thursday mornings to meet someone from the Whysup team, alongside the BWRG they are doing a tremendous job helping people in similar situations

[Tonge moor green jacket]

12 hours ago, mr_disco said:

I am not a football player. If there was a button I would have pressed it a long, long time ago. It's really hard living with depression. I take medication and they help. I love Bolton Wanderers. But I do not like life. I lurk on here because it gives me a sense of chat, which I don't have in my life. I read your lives and they make me smile. Your take on life is beautiful, filthy and abhorrent sometimes but it keeps me going. I love you all xx

 

I presume you've read the mental health threads, where loads of us have spoken about our experiences. 

Feel free to send a pm to anyone if you think they may able to help, even if it's just to share experiences, and know you're not alone.

Aye you another sertraline chap; that seems to be quite a commonly taken medicine amongst those on here?

[RONNIE PHILLIPS]

12 minutes ago, Tonge moor green jacket said:

I presume you've read the mental health threads, where loads of us have spoken about our experiences. 

Feel free to send a pm to anyone if you think they may able to help, even if it's just to share experiences, and know you're not alone.

Aye you another sertraline chap; that seems to be quite a commonly taken medicine amongst those on here?

I think most of us only started after coming on here though 😂

[Krimzon]

23 hours ago, mr_disco said:

I am not a football player. If there was a button I would have pressed it a long, long time ago. It's really hard living with depression. I take medication and they help. I love Bolton Wanderers. But I do not like life. I lurk on here because it gives me a sense of chat, which I don't have in my life. I read your lives and they make me smile. Your take on life is beautiful, filthy and abhorrent sometimes but it keeps me going. I love you all xx

 

Ive also had my battles with depression and stress , I was an ICU Nurse for a long time , I now work in mental health . The people on here are wonderful and in real life too , probably the most fun you can have with people you have never met (even if one of them insists on wearing pink shorts) but if you ever need a discreet chat  PM me .....If you are anxious about reaching out I can send you my email/phone number just in case you ever need it . Silence is the destroyer.

You are never alone and the medication is nothing to be embarrassed about 1 in 4 adults in the UK take prescribed "mood stabilisers". I myself have been on Citalopram for 20 years.

[mr_disco]

I was genuinely scared to come back on here. Ace to hear positivity. These last couple of years have been a very dark place for me. It's assumed people have a support network. Well, I don't. When I was in my late 20s I posted on here for a laugh. Now I am 42 am fumbling round for a reason to live and it's Bolton Wanderers. Please know I love you all, I will continue to lurk and above all- Come On You White Men!!

[perth_white]

4 hours ago, mr_disco said:

I was genuinely scared to come back on here. Ace to hear positivity. These last couple of years have been a very dark place for me. It's assumed people have a support network. Well, I don't. When I was in my late 20s I posted on here for a laugh. Now I am 42 am fumbling round for a reason to live and it's Bolton Wanderers. Please know I love you all, I will continue to lurk and above all- Come On You White Men!!

Add me to the list of people you can drop a pm to if needed. I'm in Australia so likely awake when the rest of the reprobates on here are (or should be) sleeping.

[CambridgeBWFC]

5 hours ago, mr_disco said:

I was genuinely scared to come back on here. Ace to hear positivity. These last couple of years have been a very dark place for me. It's assumed people have a support network. Well, I don't. When I was in my late 20s I posted on here for a laugh. Now I am 42 am fumbling round for a reason to live and it's Bolton Wanderers. Please know I love you all, I will continue to lurk and above all- Come On You White Men!!

Don't just lurk, get a bit more involved, certainly on this side of the board, behind the stands I might swerve 😀. I am 40 next year and can share some of that thinking, but BWFC is as good a reason as any, even if the last ten years they have tried there hardest to disappoint!!

Do you get to many matches? if you do certainly try and meet some off here, I don't go often living in Cambridge but live football is a great boost for me, I had forgotten how much I missed it/relied in it for my mood, even when it is shit it can help forget the other issues. As other have said PM me if you need to.

 

[gonzo]

5 hours ago, mr_disco said:

I was genuinely scared to come back on here. Ace to hear positivity. These last couple of years have been a very dark place for me. It's assumed people have a support network. Well, I don't. When I was in my late 20s I posted on here for a laugh. Now I am 42 am fumbling round for a reason to live and it's Bolton Wanderers. Please know I love you all, I will continue to lurk and above all- Come On You White Men!!

Get yourself out to the match and meet a few off here pal. Theres always plenty in harvesters, hotel etc. Plus theres Fleetwood and accy coming up. 

 

[RONNIE PHILLIPS]

7 hours ago, mr_disco said:

I was genuinely scared to come back on here. Ace to hear positivity. These last couple of years have been a very dark place for me. It's assumed people have a support network. Well, I don't. When I was in my late 20s I posted on here for a laugh. Now I am 42 am fumbling round for a reason to live and it's Bolton Wanderers. Please know I love you all, I will continue to lurk and above all- Come On You White Men!!

It's good to have you back 👍. You're a White, you're of us, that means you have back up on here if you feel you need it. 

[little whitt]

9 hours ago, mr_disco said:

I was genuinely scared to come back on here. Ace to hear positivity. These last couple of years have been a very dark place for me. It's assumed people have a support network. Well, I don't. When I was in my late 20s I posted on here for a laugh. Now I am 42 am fumbling round for a reason to live and it's Bolton Wanderers. Please know I love you all, I will continue to lurk and above all- Come On You White Men!!

if your on FB 

BWRG have a drop in center at the VULCAN on a Thur 

pop down for a chat 

 

[MickyD]

As with everyone else, I’m happy to chat.
 

But please, before you do anything else, quickly think of a reason to live beyond BWFC. Absolutely anything at all. Perhaps family or friends.

You aren’t in control of anything BWFC can do now or in the future. I’d really hate your ups and downs to be based on a group of blokes who kick a ball about.

[Zico]

10 hours ago, mr_disco said:

I was genuinely scared to come back on here. Ace to hear positivity. These last couple of years have been a very dark place for me. It's assumed people have a support network. Well, I don't. When I was in my late 20s I posted on here for a laugh. Now I am 42 am fumbling round for a reason to live and it's Bolton Wanderers. Please know I love you all, I will continue to lurk and above all- Come On You White Men!!

I suggest you visit the battle nips thread, the feeling you got guessing just one if not both nips correctly can make your day