Bea Smith

Yeah i was really hurt by that. I even had a bath before i met him.

Well thats just plain selfish. I was so obsessed with bavarians that when i lived next door to hampsons i would go in at 9am in my nightie on and buy em up before selfish gits like you had em!

Oh yes...slacks...a wondrous word. Although im more in the habit of saying 'trollies', my children are rather perplexed when i say 'pull yer trollies up', they tend to look at me like im some random nutjob who has taken over their mother.

There were beers in it too!! The pig!!

On my rare choccy eating occasions its gotta be either Galaxy or terrys chocolate orange. Anything else is a cop out

Is it a descendant of the Arndale budgies?

I was just trying to be considerate to the next bloke who wants his prostrate tickling.

Where?

so i should keep my 'fingering finger' nail short then?

I like this thread. I have a thing about the word 'ginnel' ,thanks Smiffs!!

'she heard ive got a 12 inch c*ck and wants some'

Nope not the type you hammer into peoples eyes. Ive finally stopped biting my fingernails. I'd quit biting my toenails but it keeps me supple. having been really chuffed with myself and been all ladylike going for a manicure i ask you blokes this. Is it something you notice? And, do you like your backs being scratched? To which level of intensity? Do you geezers look after your hands? We all know Mannyroad58 would as he moisturises. Also- im interested in nail related injuries to testicles. Dunno why- im just sick!

Aaah yes, the emergency sharting plan.

You're sick!! Bloke after my own heart!!

Old mans penis, Omp for short. Actually Omps a good name!

But we can compare cellulite , how exciting!!!!!!

Yeah she contacted Jay too to add her. he doesnt know who she is either but at the end of the day the bods ok so just add her and see if you can get a jump! P,S- Smiley- the bedding is like that to hide stains.

Yes girls were ranked by fingers and if there was a 4 finger kitkat girl basically a lad had got his hand up there. Thats why i got offended that it was a 4 finger kitkat wrapper. He didnt have a clue why i was narked as he grew up in a country that didnt use the 'kitkat girl' terminology. Once i explained he thought it was even funnier. What other chocolate wrappers could be stuck on a ladies ass? Finger of fudge? Cadburys chocolate fingers?

So are we having a naked sleepover party?

In the buff. Unless im sleeping somewhere else, or if i have guests sleeping over in which case i wear something to cover me up to avoid the 'bumping into eachother on the landing' scenario!! I hate sleeping with anything on, i feel constricted, its just not right. But i absolutely have to be covered up to sleep, even on a hot night i still have to have a thin cotton sheet over me, is that a security blanket type issue?

Oh there are sooooo many ways to answer that! I think you should all take a guess........ ( this should be entertaining..... )

Anyone got a fridge freezer going cheap?? can pick up wednesday. All dead bodies should be removed from the freezer compartment. Thankyou.

I was just narked cos it was a four finger kit-kat. Cheeky pig.

wondered how long that would take!!

Not a superman but TSo duffed on my ass cheek when i was asleep and stuck a chocolate bar wrapper to it. When i woke up it had set like glue, when i ripped it off it removed a layer of skin, and as id been sunbathing i had brown bum cheeks and one white rectangle on the right cheek. Did i go mad???? I laughed myself stupid. Crazy bugger!! I reckon spunk could be used as wallpaper paste, loctite super glue and probably could be used for pointing if it wasnt so messy!!