Spider

Certainly did. It's the one where they go to the laundrette too. First class.

Was that Rick? Good spot young man.

Worlds biggest bottom burp?

Easy ones? Record for world's stickiest bogey?

Heskey ??5million. Still chuckling now.

thought you'd be more of a kinky afro man pb?

I've just read that link, and have the following request for Bolton council: Dear BC, I need a house please. I am a Christian so it must come with the following: 1. A smashing view of pastoral England, to remind me of God's work. 2. A 60" plasma tv with Sky so I can watch all the religion channels and be reminded of what a top bloke God is. 3. 8 bedrooms so I can have oodles of good Christian children, as God intended. 4. Lots of free vouchers for things like food, decorating and alcohol - Jesus was a fisherman, a carpenter and a wino and it would be deeply offensive to my religious sensibilities if I were denied all these things. 5. A big fast car with free petrol. To quote from my Bible : "And the good Lord said, let him who hath an Aston be granted a place in heaven." If you say no, I will blow the town hall clock up.

pb, I consulted somes older fellas in the boozer once about this, and their advice was ''iron filings, soot and a fight once a week is all tha needs for t'keep your fizzog lookin' healthy'' hope this helps.

Back to the original point ie. Lebanon: Would it be THAT hard for them to just give the 2 feckin soldiers back? No. Israel have siad the guns stop immediatly if they are returned. So the Lebanese might as well shoot their citizens themselves. Hand them back then have a chat - the ball is in their court.

why shouldn't fund muslim only schools? they fund schools for christians jews etc, so why not for muslims? Perhaps if all single religion schools were banned then there wouldn't be the fear and missunderstanding between religions, plus there wouldn't be places for the nutters to tie in hatred to the education system! On that we agree Franky. But you tell a muslim parent their child has to follow a British syllabus and they will probably issue the head with a fatwa.

Don't you have to prove you go to church to get into Canon Slade? Check the papers - they now are obliged to accept other religions there - you just need to prove you attend a place of worship.

did somebody mention canon slade? Muslims are allowed (nay obliged) to attend Canon Slade nowadays.

No problem with this personally, but if this happened anywhere in the UK....

My missus is having our first child in February, and though I'm not particularly religious, I will be getting him/her Christened, and hopefully into a church-orientated school. And this is primarily to avoid a school full of muslims. Ask yourself this - if somewhere in Bolton a state school opened saying only Christians could attend, there would be a riot. Schools open for muslims only (and before you start they aren't all privately funded - the govt. spends a fortune on muslim-only schools) and that is acceptable. They have things all their own way and always always always hide behind Islam, and it makes me puke. In saudi arabia, non-muslims near mecca are forbidden from even looking at the city, and must drive round it on a motorway that prevents you from doing so. Can you imagine if there was a big sign that said ''No muslims'' near St. Pauls Cathedral?

What are they expected to do? Tickle them into submission?

I imagine the Hizbollah rockets keep landing in the sea?

Without labouring a point - you are effectively saying that its ok for any country bordering Israel to throw bombs at them because they took back some land, whilst if Israel defends itself they are subhuman? Again, you don't see jews blowing up the tube/trains/knocking down buildings - you see the jews merely defending their homeland by convential means.

Says who? You can be whatever you want to be here. Fine. Tell that to the people on the tube last July 7th. I'm sure they were delighted to be stood next to these ''soldiers of god''. People who kill in the name of religion are the worst kind of scum. With the possible exception of ManU fans from the home counties.

The Palestian argument is that it is not Israel's land. The state was founded post war and the Arabs already living there expelled. So now you see the problem - which is why this will be going on long after we're all gone. Truth is, ALL muslims everywhere (despite what the 'moderates' say) despise the Israelies, and would like them wiped off the face of the earth. The last person who tried that was Hitler - go figure out whose side you're on.

Here here pb. Britain was a Chritian country last time I looked. And one of the icons of said religion was a jew, not a muslim. It's not rocket science.

With you Bolty. All the Israelies want is their land back. Each border they have is with a country that refuses to recognise they even exist, so you can understand their paranoia. And the Iranians (who bankroll Hizbollah) have as much as said that as soon as they get the chance they are going to nuke Tel Aviv. Like Bolty says, when was the last time you looked suspiciously at a bloke with a big nose carrying a rucsac?

You're on bitter wi' me though braniac - martini my arse.

Rice cakes? Are you saying I'm fat? OK, I'll suffer the torture of a Ye Olde offering just for you. You're on. Right. Full size pasties or the rather splendid mini versions? We can eat them on the church wall, then wash them down with half a bitter in the 3 crowns. Never had a mini one I'll just have to make sure I dig deep in my pockets for something that can satisfy you then.

can't be it's israel the untouchables Careful - that could be misconstrued as a dig at the 4x2's and you'll be accused of reading Mein Kampf each morning....

Rice cakes? Are you saying I'm fat? OK, I'll suffer the torture of a Ye Olde offering just for you. You're on. Right. Full size pasties or the rather splendid mini versions? We can eat them on the church wall, then wash them down with half a bitter in the 3 crowns.