Crawley White

I'm with Smiffs on this one, 'where are you?' seems to be the most common these days. When I'm pissed its almost a metaphysical question. Although considering I'm either at work or driving to work I don't see what the point of texing me is!

There is a Sikh memorial for those who died fighting for Britain in WW2 that overlooks Brighton on the Downs. It has the saddest inscription that you've ever read simply saying, 'They died so far from home.'

Round the corner from my house and has caused a massive traffic jam. If anyone was wondering what Crawley is like I think this paints an accurate picture. The local offlicence is in for problems if all the alcholics from the half way house down the road start buying their booze in there.

The Ting Tings?!!! You must be soft in the head.

No No - quite the opposite Yes No - middle class catholic girl from Plymouth Ask her fella Shes very good at her job, but not a patch on yours truly although give her a few years and she'll probably be much better, and yes I have been into the costume department but only to nick stuff for any fancy dress parties I'm invited to so hence always look top draw.

She doesn't drive.

Yep, I agree, and yes my social conscience is a bit on the wane. Sold my soul for my new job which is selling purely commerical theatre to the big regional venues (check local press for details) and the west end. Started off at the Green Room in Manchester thinking we could change the world through contemporary dance done by lesbian's who eat mung bean soup. I was wrong. Very, very wrong. Plus the pay is shite.

Always been hit and miss these NME tours but they are cheap, think I saw Asian Dub Foundation, that band who had SEB in it before she went solo and The Stereophonics. 98 I think. It was poo, but it was ?15 at the time.

:::: Oh yes.

Congratulations. Does the role still involve sitting down all the way through the play whilst Joseph opens and closes the door for the various well wishers? Crawley Jr was a star last year. Literally. Took me about two weeks to make the costume and then some of the scrubbers just dressed their kids in white PJs.

Ah that's logical but this is theatre, which is not. There is also a bit of resentment around the place as she used to be my Marketing Officer and you know what promotion does to people - green eyed monster comes out, and she wasn't very popular when she was here last. Impression people got is that she thought of herslef a little too highly. Can't personally say I noticed, always good at her job and did everything I wanted from a team member. Anyway, I have decided to take the moral high ground and not mention a thing, in fact fair play to her - and she is really good at her job and a nice person. Its all karma y'see.

So its my last day in my current job tomorrow and I've just found out that my replacement is getting one year travel allowance from Guilford to Chichester. Now I've spent a small fortune in travelling from Crawley. Fair fcuks to them for getting a decent deal but part of me wants to be an evil swine and starting letting this little nugget of information slip to her staff which would cause more than a bit of resentment as most of them travel in from Portsmouth. I know this would make me a back stabbing, two faced little arse but the moral dilema I put to you is should I do it anyway just to make me feel better? At the moment I'm going towards the dark side of the force.

Me plus 2. I only come to watch when we're doing shite.

I know, and I bought you drinks all night as well.

He's dead and I've not, to the best of my knowledge, ever slept with you or Russel Brand.

Thanks Casino, big love to you to. :::: Its the march of the moral high ground brigade this, nothing to do with racist slurs. You seem a bright enough chap I thought you'd have the wit to see that the issues are unrelated and this media who har is designed for one thing, to sell newspapers that have an agenda against the BBC for being seemingly too left wing. If he found it that offensive why does is grandaughter use this as publicity vehicle? If its that distressing surely a family would want this to blow over as quickly as possible. Its hipocracy and media manipulation at its worst, and the sad thing is its completely transparent. And for the record, yes I found it funny, but I don't think many people out there are really defending this comedy us the overeaction to it. And, I'm sorry but I have just as much right as anyone else to comment on it, so its just as much to do with me as any other BBC licence fee payer.

To be fair you work in construction, I work in theatre, I would say its more likely I know more gay folk.

Ooooh, get you Spider, you big bully boy, you.

A lecturer at uni was gay and hated the queens who flounced about the place, he thought that just because he liked cock didn't mean he had to be a limp wrist. Got mates who are camp and gay, gay and butch (not in a YMCA type way), straight and camp - is it that big an issue?

I have similar thoughts about those that go watching Ice Hockey in Britain. Maybe its just those that like American sports.

Well keep your eyes open in the Fanzone at the City match. I'll be the one in winklepickers insulting people's elderly relatives.

Bollocks, nice way to help his grandaughter promote her stuff and get his name in the paper for a few days. Andrew Sachs has got a massive ego and loves his 'national treasure' tag. I'm sorry but employing Max Clifford BEFORE you get solicitors shows just the level of your 'distress'.

Rah rah fckin' rah, some people on here don't half get a bit het up about nothing. I thought it was quite funny. Although what I do find irritating is this girl employing Max Clifford to do an interview in the Sun (I'm sure she won't be getting paid anything for that ) and the Daily Mail middle england mob getting on their moral high horses. There was 2 complaints when the show went out live, if it wasn't for that holier than thou, butter wouldn't melt (what's the name of your band again, love? Oh the Vampire Sluts) rebuttal this would have deflated quicker than Andrew Sachs post Flowery T*ats career.

What the hungover singletons? Nah, fcuk 'em, if I'm up and early on Saturday morning then the only thing that's going to cheer me up is pissing off everyone else while I'm shopping. But to be fair, I only shop online and get bits and bats from Lidl.

When he said he was doing 'silver service' I didn't expect that!