Classic WW thread...

 

Anyway, bollock naked for me and no, i've never tried to piss like a woman...

we've done sit down pisses before and it was decided that it was acceptable.

Classic WW thread...

 

Anyway, bollock naked for me and no, i've never tried to piss like a woman...

 

Will you change your feckin avatar?!?!!

 

(I always stand up too0

Isnt is a bugger though when you need a piss first thing, and end up trying to bend it towards the bog.

 

Doris compains bitterly if I spash the floortiles, understandably, but short of pissing into the the sink, its one of lifes problems us blokes just have to deal with.

 

Stand about 2 feet from the toilet.

Lean forward and lean against the wall, forming a triangle of the floor, the wall and your body.

It is then easier to direct the piss into the bowl without spraying the walls.

Good point there Traf, however you then need to shuffle towards the pan at a rate that is proportional to the bladder force versus penis fladicity ratio.

 

By the time you've got rid of a gallon, you're staight over the pan, hand on wall Nazi salute style (always the one you write with too) and you've then lost that 'momentum'.

 

When do you let the 8 second fart out?

Good point there Traf, however you then need to shuffle towards the pan at a rate that is proportional to the bladder force versus penis fladicity ratio.

 

By the time you've got rid of a gallon, you're staight over the pan, hand on wall Nazi salute style (always the one you write with too) and you've then lost that 'momentum'.

 

When do you let the 8 second fart out?

 

 

 

[ My Mississ lets out the 8 second botty burp just before she opens her eyes, each and every fooking morning]

Slight side step, does anyone else get a shiver when coming to the end of a piss? I seem to remember my biology teacher mentioning it, definitely happens too!

 

Watch out for it next time!

Slight side step, does anyone else get a shiver when coming to the end of a piss? I seem to remember my biology teacher mentioning it, definitely happens too!

 

Watch out for it next time!

 

Hope this helps!

 

The autonomic nervous system controls the body's involuntary muscles, including the digestive tract, heart, and bladder muscles. It also regulates your body's temperature control, making you sweat to cool off and shiver to warm up.

 

During urination, the autonomic system can get overstimulated. "In addition to the messages the system is sending to your bladder, it may also communicate with other areas," Cross notes. Hence the shiver.

 

This phenomenon can be a real health problem for some men: They can pass out at the urinal when their autonomic system cues a drop in blood pressure!

we've done sit down pisses before and it was decided that it was acceptable.

 

 

 

 

 

Boxers or nude for me.

When do you let the 8 second fart out?

 

Midflow, as the momentum is decreasing. It sort of gives you a little boost.

Bloody hell! Pimms on the rocks all over the screen!

 

Mencal, plain mencal you lot are!

Hope this helps!

 

The autonomic nervous system controls the body's involuntary muscles, including the digestive tract, heart, and bladder muscles. It also regulates your body's temperature control, making you sweat to cool off and shiver to warm up.

 

During urination, the autonomic system can get overstimulated. "In addition to the messages the system is sending to your bladder, it may also communicate with other areas," Cross notes. Hence the shiver.

 

This phenomenon can be a real health problem for some men: They can pass out at the urinal when their autonomic system cues a drop in blood pressure!

 

Well, I've never quite passed out which I suppose is a bonus!

Midflow, as the momentum is decreasing. It sort of gives you a little boost.

 

 

I'd be careful though with your advancing years for fear of a follow through (I think that's the technical term). I think that's when the sit down pee becomes the best option, I would presume.

Indeed.

 

It is next to impossible to tense that muskul which stops you pissing, mid piss - especialy if your pissing like the co-op horse.

 

You could squeeze your nob and quickly try and get the bog seat down, the rest of your clothing lower, turn around, sit, tuck it into the pan and let go movement completed, without the near bladder bursting pressure forcing you to piss all over your hand.

 

But its very hard to do, with just one hand free.

You could try and piss with the seat down. I know it's an alien concept to some blokes, but you could always try. That'd give you a bit of time.

You know, I cant fcukin win.

 

When I typed that, I initially left lowering the bog seat out, but thought to include it or face the wrath of the ww flatdicks about blokes pissing all over it.

You know, I cant fcukin win.

Strangely, that's a mantra I hear in my household regularly! Can't think why!

Going completly off topic, I got it proper in the neck before for rolling my eyes at her in a 'i wish you would stop interupting and listen to what I have said 3 times in the last 20 minutes you dopey cow' type of way. She hates it when I remind her I am not one of her fukcin schoolchildren. ::::::

 

We were on about my headlights, serious discussion it was.

Going completly off topic, I got it proper in the neck before for rolling my eyes at her in a 'i wish you would stop interupting and listen to what I have said 3 times in the last 20 minutes you dopey cow' type of way. She hates it when I remind her I am not one of her fukcin schoolchildren. ::::::::

 

We were on about my headlights, serious discussion it was.

 

 

Eye rolling is up there with leaving the toilet seat up & "leave that, love, I'll do it", when you know we've just about finished!

Anyway, these headlights, what's up with them like?

On the subject of pissing into bogs, I was out in Miami Beach for a wedding and went to the bride's parent's place. Very swish, marble floors, pool, the works...but quite a bit of it still being refurbished. So anyway I happily partook of their generous supply of illicit Cuban cigars, beer and rum and so after a while I was a bit sloshed and also gagging for a piss; everyone else was out by the pool so I wandered inside and into what appeared at first boozy glance to be the bathroom. After all there was a bog, so it must have been. It was only after empyting me bladder, and trying to flush, that I realised the awful truth - the room was one of them being done up, and while it was indeed a bog I had been pissing into, it wasn't actually plumbed into anything....

Anyway, these headlights, what's up with them like?

 

Sigh. You can tell I've nowt to do.

 

Tis a Volvo, hence lights are on perminantly, but one light appears brighter than the other.

 

Both main bulbs were recently replaced within 2 days of each other, (beleive it or not they both went within 2 days of each other after working fine for 2 years). However, when it happened I'd mentioned the first one to her, but not the second one, so she thought only one bulb had been replaced.

 

I explained the 2 bulb scenario 3 FCUKING TIMES but she wasnt listening and still reckoned it was becuase one bulb was old and one wasnt, rather than accepting my assesment that the alignment is askew because when you dip them with the uppy downy dipper switchy thing on the dash, they are fine.

 

Carry on.

Edited May 17, 200818 yr by Smiffs

mi nan has a set of curtains like that...

Can't do buff - unless I've had a drunken mucky shag and my shorts have disappeared in the melee of the bedding.

exactly like me smiley !! cannot do in the buff thingymijig

the thing that always does me, is when you bend it back, think you've got the aim right, and then it fires out at a completely unexpected angle which you just cannot account for and when you think you have that one under control, all of a sudden, two streams emerge

 

that said, watching the streams come back to form one can be a thing of great natural beauty

thats absolutly fcuking spot on that happens to me as well

Who's romantic enough to bring the towel afterwards though?