like egg and bacon mayo that you can buy from asda are pretty good for putting your knob in and having a wank

 

 

just saying like

twisted?

Don't like those one's, bring me out in a rash.

do you still use them to fill your sandwich afterwards?

We are in a recession and all that.

Make your own "mayo"?

i was always told that a jar of chopped liver was the best...

My dad said a tin of worms did the trick.

My dad said a tin of worms did the trick.

 

Would that be classed as beastialty?

This one looks like Cameron. The ones at Burnden in the early 70's were more emaciated and looked like they'd spent most of their lives down a cellar.

 

you fucking aminals

 

tin of chopped tomatoes is were its at

Thick cut boiled ham folded up and left between a double radiator for an hour or so.

 

Use waitrose if your gonna think about someone like Kate Middleton.

Thick cut boiled ham folded up and left between a double radiator for an hour or so.

 

Use waitrose if your gonna think about someone like Kate Middleton.

So who were you thinking about when you bought Bernard Matthews the other day?? ;-)

Delia smith.

remember cutting a hole out of the corner of my mattress when i was wee laddy to try and bugger that....

spring loaded or memory foam.

spring loaded or memory foam.

 

i was about 14 mate so dont think memory foam was around then!...

 

remember nicking a load of my older brothers blueys....never forget one called 'aunt peg'....all the money shots were blacked out.

 

 

had to resort to the baby oil whizzed up a few times...

And if you get sick of pulling yourself round the house you could always wap yer nudger in-between the sofa cushions and shag it. Lying down across it or doggy style, take yer pick.

Pound of tepid stewing steak firmly wedged in the end of a Dyson

Done.

Edited June 4, 201214 yr by Spider

I have an image of a plethora of Morris Days that needs to leave my head.

Don't be kidding us that you don't walk round the fruit and veg aisle in netto looking for phallic shaped objects to entertain yourself with.

 

 

Don't be kidding us that you don't walk round the fruit and veg aisle in netto looking for phallic shaped objects to entertain yourself with.

 

Difference with wimmin is we pay good money for our play things.

You can't eat them afterwards tho

You can't eat them afterwards tho

 

Dunno, seen some women swallow some dodgy things

You can't eat them afterwards tho

 

I worry about you!