isaacunt

Kinnell Traf, J don't look that bad toodle pip

[-X [-X [-X [-X [-X [-X [-X toodle pip

Well remembered toodle pip

thought i looked soooooooooooooooo sexxxxxxxxxxy toodle pip

trouble is i'd be sleeping in me own vomit too Ya f??ckin GIRL toodle pip

Traf, doesn't like being called a manc!! Don't mind telling to f??ck off though. toodle pip

We shud ban numpties who write wi the CAPSLOCK F??CKIN ON Toodle pip

Can't get 1 over you Traff!!! got it sent to me this morning! toodle pip

What I did on my summer holiday By Theo Walcott Esq aged 8 1/2 I went to a place called Germany with my Uncle Sven and some other grown up's. It is a country in Europe where a bad man called Adolf used to live with his nazties, he does not live there anymore, Uncle Owen does live there, and the grown up's say I cant talk about the bad man as it will make Uncle Owen cry if I do. In Germany there are lots of castles and some mountains. We are staying in a place called Baden Baden that's a silly name, Uncle Frank has the same name as his dad, that's silly too, his mum must get their underpants mixed up all the time. On the aeroplane Uncle Sol sat next to me, he got me some toffee and wants to be my friend, he works at the place where I do my YTS, so does Uncle Freddy but him and Uncle Sol are not best friends anymore. Uncle Owen met us at the airport, he talks foreign, Uncle Wayne, Uncle Steven and Uncle David also talk funny, my mum says Uncle David talks like Orville, he is a duck, Uncle Sol say's uncle David wears dresses and knickers, and asked me if I had ever worn them. Uncle Sol got me some pop.In Germany the grown ups are going to play football, my grandad says we beat them in the olden days before my mum was born. That is a long time ago.While the grown up's went to play football so I went shopping with Auntie Vicky and some other girls she bought me a big ice cream and got herself a little one but she said she was full before she had eaten any and threw it away. She bought lots of shoes and handbags and let me play with Brooklyn. She say's she used to be in a pop band and sang me one of her songs, I think she was telling fibs.I told Uncle Sol about my day out with Vicky and he sulked, then he bought me an even bigger ice cream with lots of hundred's & thousands on it.All the other grown up's have a girlfriend except Uncle Sol so he plays with me while they go out. Uncle Sven says I must keep Uncle Sol happy, that's hy I got taken on holiday. The grown up's went to play Football against somebody called Sweden, Uncle Sol was crying as Uncle Freddy played for them and would not talk to him. Uncle Sol bought me lots of toffee today and some crisps. Uncle Sven is from Sweden and I heard him on the phone to their boss last night. Uncle Michael hurt his knee and had to go home to his mum for a plaster. Uncle Peter is a giant, a proper giant like you see in books, he is rubbish at fotball though. Uncle Wayne had a sore toe at the start of out holiday but it got better so they let him play football. Uncle Sol got me a present but I do not like it.He says all Germans wear leather underpants and I should while we are here, they are too tight for me. All the grown up's started to call Uncle Wayne a potato head who stood on somebodys spuds. He got shouted at by the referee. They are all saying that we have to go home now. Uncle Sol was crying again and I had to sit on his knee to make him stop. He had his mobile phone in his pocket, I think toodle pip

Some good points there, Nat! A few more than we'll get this season! toodle pip

Why dintcha pop round & visit us???????????????? toodle pip

Just pinched this of ITK site A bloke walks into a bar and sees a jar full of money on the Counter.'What is the Jar for', he asks. The Bartender replies'If you can make my orse laugh, you win it'. The Bloke walks up to the horse and whispers in its ear,whereon the Horse starts laughing loudly, stamping its feet with tears rolling down its face The Bloke picks up the jar and walks out. three months later the baloke walks into the same Bar and sees another Jar of money on the Bar, so asks what it is for, The Bartender tells him that the Horse hasnt stopped laughing since the last time, and if he can get it to stop, he will win the Jar.The bloke goes up to the horse and stands with his back to the room, whereon the Horse stops laughing. He picks up the jar and ,as he goes to walk out , the Bartender asks him what he said to the Horse to make it laugh . ' I told it my dick was bigger than his'. ' And the second time' ?. ' I showed him .' toodle pip

Can i have another clue???????? Yes you can PM me NB. toodle pip A dwarf once did it to you Thats F??cking Disgusting toodle pip

Can i have another clue???????? Yes you can PM me NB. toodle pip

What doe NB do for a livving?????? I want to know, now!!! toodle pip

A guy and a girl meet in a bar ... They get along so well that they decide to go back to the girl's place. A few drinks later, the guy takes off his shirt and washes his hands. He then takes off his trousers and washes his hands again. The girl had been watching him and says, "You must be a dentist." The guy, surprised, says, "Yes. How did you figure that out?" "Easy," she replied, "You keep washing your hands." One thing led to another and they made love. After they were done, the girl says, "You must be a good dentist." The guy, now with a boosted ego says, "Yes, I'm a good dentist. How did you figure that out?" "Didn't feel a thing!" toodle pip

Traff, don't forget the Naps league!!!!!!!!!!!! toodle pip

Yeh but its which fcuking bus to the ground out of Leicester. Nowhere seems to say! Does the 542 not go past the ground??????????? if ya get a 544 from outside the red lion @ 3.05pm, then get off the stop before the centre, cross over the road & if yer Quick, you would've just missed the 542 @ 3.22pm. toodle pip

Not too sure if this is a Bextor, but her goes My wonderful girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married. There was only one little thing bothering me. It was her beautiful younger sister.My prospective sister-in-law was twenty-two, wore very tight miniskirts. She was very touchy feely and I got the general impression that she liked me more than she let on. One day "little" sister called and asked me to come over to check the wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived, and she whispered to me that she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't overcome. She told me that she wanted to make love to me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister. Well, I was in total shock, and couldn't say a word. She said, "I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want one last wild fling, just come up and get me." I was stunned and frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. when she reached the top she pulled off her panties and threw them down the stairs at me. I stood there for a moment, then turned and ade a beeline straight to the front door. I opened the door, and headed straight towards my car. Lo and behold, my entire future family was standing outside, all clapping! With tears in his eyes, my future father-in-law hugged me and said, "we are very happy that you have passed our little test.....we couldn't ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family." >> And the moral of this story is: > >> > >> > >> > >> > >> > >> > >> Always keep your condoms in your car........ :D/ :D/ :D/ toodle pip

A man has great tickets for the World Cup Final. As he sits down, another man comes down and asks if anyone is sitting in the empty seat next to him. No," he says. "The seat is empty." This is incredible!" says the other man. Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the World cup Final, the biggest sporting event, and not use it?" Well, actually, the seat belongs to me. My wife was supposed to come with me, but she passed away. This is the first World Cup Final we haven't been to together since we got married." Oh , I'm sorry to hear that...that's terrible. But couldn't you find someone else, a friend or relative, or even a neighbour to take the seat?" The man shakes his head. "No, they're all at the funeral." toodle pip :D/ :D/ :D/ :D/ :D/ :D/

Been working in Tesco's on the wines & spirit section, but i got the sack. A asian came in & said could i recommend a good port, i said Dover now F??ck Off Toodle pip

An old lady looking into a cash machine, turns round & asks me if i could check her balance??????????? so i pushed the c??nt over. toodle pip :D/ :D/ :D/ :D/ :D/ :D/ :D/ :D/

i polish mine whenever i get the urge, so i say about 3 times a day, most day's :D/ :D/ :D/ :D/ :D/ :D/ :D/ :D/ :D/ :D/ :D/ :D/ :D/ :D/ toodle pip

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/5119916.stm toodle pip

i have a pair if you want them toodle pip