Bea Smith

If cures for the biggies are found then there would have to be population controls in place, a limit on children being one of them. It would probably help to let a few serial killers back out of the nick too.

Now it may just be me, but i dont find drunk men attractive. Of course when youre drunk yourself you dont notice, But driving sober to pick up a drunk man to have sex with? Not my cup of tea.

My pitiful cries clearly fell on deaf ears! Wankers

I have been to benidorm once and shall not be repeating it. Everything was horrendous. The Old town is much nicer but unfortunately my hotel was in the New Town. My teeth are itching thinking about it. Its like a giant 'Swan' . I dont like that place either.

I feel sorry for anyone who goes to the loo for peace and quiet.

I think thats much worse than a handjob whilst pooing

Why did i immediately think of little Whitt?

Get yourself a travel pillow and get your head down for the long haul, beats reading the back of shampoo bottles when bored.

also- isnt it slightly wierd to sctively seek out people you already know on a dating site?

I do like my incorrigible friends

I didnt! I think it all depends on your 'profile' if you put 'just looking for a bit of fun' then youre going to give the impression you just want a shag. Frankly though , id rather meet a stranger sober having converesed with them a little as opposed to picking up some pissed up nob in the swan. In fact, those of you that know me also know i have a fit if i get dragged into the Swan! Horrible place. Some folk get fingered in the disabled bogs.

That could be another experiment, Could i pull wimmin posing as a man and have a higher success rate than a man? is it ethical? No. Could it be mildly amusing. yes

I think real fingering tracks are for lovemaking and therefore not suitable for folk you pick up off the tinterweb, however i do agree in the different phone and ipod' for different situations theory. I think i should do some research E and get back to you. I may have 'folders' in the ipod for different 'types' of men so i can play the correct music, thus lulling them into a sense of comfort. Will someone buy me an ipod? Its for science!!!!

Total and utter slag

Ive been asked to say a few words at my friends wedding ( this may be an issue...note the word 'few') So, i have now got the 'best woman speech' in 8 days. Er...help!!!! Whats ok and whats not? Do i say ' i fondly remember the time when i lived above a fruit shop and we broke in to steal parsnips which we then used for a 'who can carve the best penis out of a parsnip' competition?. Would admitting breaking and entering and theft be a bit much for her parents?

It is what you intend it to be. The site is free and attracts allsorts.So there are the ones who simply want sex and the ones who want to date, then there are the ones who want to find a partner. Dating and wanting a partner are wildly different things and shouldnt be confused. I used Plenty of Fish a couple of years ago and went on a few dates, for me it was a good experience as it boosted my confidence after a marriage breakup and a couple of years of singledom had left feeling crap about myself. As a woman ( even an ozzie ginger lezzer convict with bad clothes) i was obviously more concerned with safety when meeting strangers. Doesnt matter how much you talk to people they are still strangers! My rules were Meet during the day in a public place, that youre familiar with, dont drink alcoghol, make sure you drive there then you can head off if you need to. Use a 'dating phone' i used a pay and go sim in a cheap phone for this. Go halves to paying for food/drink/activities. Let someone know where you are going and who with. The mans version would probably be HBAHT Am i in there Will she stalk me after? I had a good experience with it, didnt meet any weirdos, was treated respectfully, and it made me feel attractive again. I wouldnt use it as a route to find a partner, but im not ruling out ever using it again in future for dating. A couple of months in i simply deleted my profile on the site and binned the 'dating sim'. In conclusion 'fill your boots if its on offer breightmet Boy'

Do you like it? its my favourite profile photo on facebook. I especially like my outfit, hand sewn and everything. Unless its face first!!!!

I hope it was a brick that was a donation from a skip and not one he actually purchased! that would clearly never do.

Sounds more than reasonable. Another one of my pet hates is people on a water meter who will only flush their toilot if they have had a poo. Cos that will save a whole fiver over the year. i assume they would flush after vomitting ??

Is suicide essential if its not on a mantlepiece?

I may have suspected......

Toilotries to the tune of ?25 with my boots points. 2 for 1 cinema tickets via orange wednesday and 20% off food at Chiquitos with a voucher. And thats just today. So in a world were frugality is becoming more essential, what things do you remember doing to save money, what did your parents do and what do you suggest? Soap miser- what the frig was that ridiculous thing from betterware or kleeneze or some wank sunday supplement magazine? bung in all the sraps of soap and squash it together to make.... a congealed mess! ( i think that was a nanna and grandad special) Did you know that cheap house vodka doubles as nail varnish remover and pound shop aftershave doubles as cheap vodka?

The waxing bit on the WOWcher advert is impressively lame.

How i regret my self imposed WW exile. Handy hints for homeworking? Sort thesen out for an hour at lunch time.

Im intelligent enough to know that the Men In White Coats cant be wrong Traf. Or that really irritating cow in a pink tshirt.