Peter North

just wondered whether to enter the dickathlon. hurr hurr hurr!!

Just bought their new CD - "Return to Cookie Mountain". absolutely top notch - highly recommended, sounds like nowt else out at the moment. Has anyone else copped a listen, critics reckon this one will top all the polls at the end of the year! Can't you tell I'm bored this afternoon

sharm is on the southern tip of the Sinai. While it is part of Egypt, it could well be in Asia, as it is separated by the red sea, and the rift valley, so from a geological point of view, it's part of the Eurasian plate. I knew this job of mine would come in handy some time. Oh, has anyone got six weeks off on full pay, eh?

I'm bobbing over to Chicago for a bit of a jolly on Thursday for a few weeks, not that I'm bragging, like! has anyone been and can they recommend any decent bars to get stuck into? Staying at the Cass hotel, just off the magnificent mile

to get back to the thread try the 'lassoo club' on Parnu Mnt, just outside the old town in Tallinn, failing that try 'Mr Robinson' at Aia 10, full of top notch russian women Club Hollywood, at Vana Posti, full of top notch estonian women and the good old Nimeta Bar on Suur-Karja for starters. Avoid the dodgy oirish pub on the main square and you are away!

Our kid didn't make it home till this morning. Nuff said, eh!

Has everyone forgot about the Food Scientists, from Deane i do believe. Their EP made int' NME as single of the weeek if I'm not mistaken in the late eighties. 'Do you know what your eating?', eh

Me balls are sticking to me legs Hurr hurr hurr!

cock!

Oh alright I'm trashed Just got home after a top evening watching them damn frenchies lose a feckin world cup Should have won60 quid for them winning only end with 40 for them reaching second place Zizou, you hurt my feelings, but it;s worth 20 quid for the best headbutt I've ever seen on TV. Yowsa!!!

shouldn't you be cooking chips for your hubby on his return from t'pub?

based on that performance he will probably end up playing for us! Can see Big Sam going for a player who plays his last match like he's in the Swan on a Friday neet!!!

i think I'll join just to watch the fat pussy on the treadmill. hurr hurr hurr!

Whilst suffering from the world's worst hangover, can any of my esteemed colleagues explain why... a) we have 'red light' area's and 'blue' movies that no matter how ill and suicidally depressed after a top day on the ale, the only part of your body that actually works are your genitals, eh? answers on a postcard, please...

Oi ref, me knob really is this big - and yer mum's just had it!

A lot of people were voting for Snow Patrol at one stage oh, and that band from sheffield, what were they called, the Artic...sorry Toilet monkeys!

Honorable mentions should go to the shirts worn by... a) Traf - had it been dipped in bleach? Widnes - the walking deckchair. Hurr hurr hurr!

They've not jumped yet - nor are they likely to. Just had a call - they are hanging round a pub in Cark, as it is too windy for anyone to jump yet. May have to go next weekend instead. Mind you with Smiley's girth, he may end up floating away into Morecambe Bay, should he ever land!!

rumour is , that old smiley will need at least two instructors due his "weight advantage". He's already bulking up and taking on liquid refreshment in the Varsity as we speak!!

Traf's favourite food, I believe!!!

Lies, and more damned lies. Where's the proof, eh, where's the photo's? The north-pole is never caught eating!!

Hold on a minute and remember one thing..... EATING'S CHEATIN' !!! Hurr hurr hurr!

Stadium Arcadium by T' Chilli Peppers is currnetly floating my boat. Quite long, but easy on the ear and definitely a grower!

lets face it, kids - youv'e done worse in yer time!!!

now I know why the special one got his special eye! Hurr hurr hurr!