I often go on other teams' fans forum type message boards. Today it was Stoke City's turn.

 

I read this and decided that maybe every messageboard has a Widnes Two Hats.

 

HOW DO YOU CLEAN YOUR BUMHOLE?

 

Always been a fascination of mine and i'd like to hear from the ladies especially...

 

When showering and cleaning your bumholes, do you stand, crouch, bend over?

 

Do you go from the front, or from behind?

 

Do you use a soapy hand, flannel, sponge?

 

Any tips on cleansing products, other than Head and Shoulders (minty version for that extra tingle).

 

There are just so many possible variations.

 

Also, does shaving your bumhole region make it easier to clean / add shelflife to the freshness?

 

Read more: http://oatcakefanzine.proboards.com/index.cgi?board=Miscellaneous&action=display&thread=144236#ixzz18BUQ4FQ7

ive noticed in my time woman to it a lot for some reson

ive noticed in my time woman to it a lot for some reson

 

 

LW, my babelfish isn't working today. Would you please clarify this post?. Ta.

He said,

 

Being very familiar with the fairer sex, I have noted, during many dalliances with the aforementioned, that they do tend to scrub their bum-holes a lot more than gentlemen do.

 

or something like that!

I know someone who runs a few inches of hot water in the bath every time he does a shit. After finishing said shit, he then sits in the water with his legs akimbo and meticulously cleanses his ringpiece. Strange bloke. Even stranger that he shared this information with everyone at the bar.

 

Personally, I'm satisfied with toilet paper. Although when it comes to showering, I'll switch the shower head into 'blast mode', and anally rape myself with a high powered jet of water.

I know someone who runs a few inches of hot water in the bath every time he does a shit. After finishing said shit, he then sits in the water with his legs akimbo and meticulously cleanses his ringpiece. Strange bloke. Even stranger that he shared this information with everyone at the bar.

 

go on admit it, that bloke is you isnt it?

go on admit it, that bloke is you isnt it?

 

Honestly, it's not. My sphincter must be utterly filthy in comparison.

Do any of you gents use moist tissue?

I'm glad I've not had my tea yet.

Do any of you gents use moist tissue?

 

 

Doris bought some, special offer or sommat and they're still sat there in the box.

 

I can't be doing with them to be honest, they're OK for getting the muck out I suppose but they always leave my arsehole feeling, well, soggy moist - like I've shit a bit, and I have to return a bit later to dry it with normal stuff.

Do any of you gents use moist tissue?

i know a bird who dose that

TMI

Doris bought some, special offer or sommat and they're still sat there in the box.

 

I can't be doing with them to be honest, they're OK for getting the muck out I suppose but they always leave my arsehole feeling, well, soggy moist - like I've shit a bit, and I have to return a bit later to dry it with normal stuff.

 

 

You can use it in conjunction with the dry stuff too, you bloody heathen.

i know a bird who dose that

 

 

I'd imagine you know a few who've had a dose.

You can use it in conjunction with the dry stuff too, you bloody heathen.

so dry wipe wet wipe dry wipe fuck that no time to read paper

You can use it in conjunction with the dry stuff too, you bloody heathen.

 

Or I could stuck to the normal stuff and give my itching cutter a good blasting thrice a week in the hotel jacuzzi.

 

Actually, on that note, has anyone ever relieved an itchy cutter with a good hard blanket ripping fart?

 

They're ace they are.

Do any of you gents use moist tissue?

 

i got some of these as a xmas present a few years back.

 

 

 

to be fair they were very soothing,

Do any of you gents use moist tissue?

 

Only when I wan't to stop the haemorroids bursting

Do any of you gents use moist tissue?

indeed, Mrs CWP bought some several months ago, and what a revelation they've been ever since!

Dry wipe, wet wipe, pat dry is the future.

Wet and dry......from B+Q.

theres nothing worse than poke through!

 

plus this topic was raised in a drunken hour a few years ago in my local.....

do you wipe your arse standing up or sitting down?....

now whatever your preference,i was astounded to see the reaction from opposing opinions....

and out of 20 blokes,it was split 50/50!!

you can't get at it proper sat down, you need a good bit of elbow room to get into the nooks and crannies

I find wet wipes are prone to smearing, although do help prevent poke through.

 

I'm with Smiffs, that wet after feel of wipes just makes you feel like you have followed through.