On a roll today.

 

Lad at our school came up with the following:

 

1) Said he was going out with Chun Li from the Streetfighter games

2) Said he had a United season ticket (when they were hard to get), but when someone rang him up at his mum's house at half time claimed the next day that he'd just popped home for a brew

3) Said that he had avoided being run over by a Mini Cooper by jumping over it as it approached

4) Claimed to suffer from delayed reactions to pain, so someone smacked him over the head with a ruler....ten minutes later he let off a massive cry and held his head.

 

Pretty sure they were all lies.

 

NB - if you went to school with Alan Nixon then you cannot use him as an example

Lad I went to school with came back off summer holidays and said he'd been down south and watched a giant air battle between the RAF and Russia but it was being kept on the quiet

 

He was also always a series ahead with X-Files when we all watched that, said in the next series there was an episode where Mulder and Scully just shagged all the way through it. Clearly never occurred!

Didn't you see that episode? No, course you couldn't have, you needed a special Satellite DIsh that showed the FOX Channel direct from America, I used my Atari ST to get a screengrab of 'The  X-Files - After Dark' Episode at the time. I've still got it on a Floppy Disc somewhere, aha, here it is, Mulder and Scully shagging.

 

Edited September 25, 201312 yr by Youri McAnespie

I had a mate called Jet we were both ten and he told me he was shagging a brahma called Sophie. I said 'Aren't you worried you have got her pregnant' he said no because he couldn't produce cum. Stupidly I have believed this for years and only recently questioned it.

Mate of mine explained the concept of blowjobs to me.

Then proceeded to explain there was a thing called a J-job, in which a man gets a condom surgically attatched to his nob.

Edited June 15, 201610 yr by Clean Shirt

Isn't Germany considered the business and economic powerhouse of Europe?

I work for a German company and everyone speaks English superbly well

I work for a German company and everyone speaks English superbly well

Which doesn't mean one shouldn't bother to learn it though.

There are a number of subjects I'm sure some people will think are pointless. This isn't aimed at you obviously but those who think that aren't usually high achievers

Languages should be an option, not mandatory, if I want/need a different language then I'll learn it, not learn it then forget it when I've finished school, I had to do both French and German because I was set 1, I tihnk I've mentioned before that I on purpose got moved down a set, so I didn't need to do German, I know a few things, can count to 100 in both, know how to say please, thankyou's etc, but most of it as been completely forgotten.

 

I'd have preferred to do double Games/P.E or summat cool/interesting like more design tech.

I work for a German company and everyone speaks English superbly well

It was more the idea of getting kids to learn the language of a country which is epicentre of business across Europe i was getting at.

 

Not wether foreign companies uk based employees speak it or not,that's obvious.

 

The sentiment is right,but we are an ignorant race.

I like that I can speak several languages, as it stops me looking like an ignorant cunt on my travels.

Plus I can understand what the foreigners are calling me.

Not speaking German doesn't matter in business. However it's a barrier if you want to go work there, and it's a great place to work. I've worked in Munich, Frankfurt, Karlsruhe, Hannover, Dusseldorf, been to Hamburg, Berlin, Cologne, Nuremburg, Munchengladbach etc. with football. Wish I'd done German TBH.

I conversed in Spanish 90% of the time with the locals this year on holiday. I found it very hard at times and resorted to yo besos Ivan campo more than once. It was clear my efforts were appreciated. I mastered los sientos in the end.

Edited September 25, 201312 yr by tomski

The problem with languages;

 

 

Which one to learn?

The problem with languages;

 

 

Which one to learn?

Probably best going for Urdu living in Bolton...

A well known liar told me he'd had a shit on the centre circle at the Reebok, when it had just been laid and fenced off. I can just imagine him climbing over the little fence in the middle of nowhere on Red Moss and having a dump.

I like that I can speak several languages, as it stops me looking like an ignorant cunt on my travels.

Plus I can understand what the foreigners are calling me.

 

Casse-toi pov'con.

A girl I went to primary school to ld outrageous lies, she'd put Aldridge Prior to shame.  Most notable being she was dying of diabetes, I was only 6 at the time so didn't know any different

Casse-toi pov'con.

 

Merci, Monsieur Sarkozy

stops me looking like an ignorant cunt.

 

 

...so tempting...must resist from doing the obvious

A girl I went to primary school to ld outrageous lies, she'd put Aldridge Prior to shame. Most notable being she was dying of diabetes, I was only 6 at the time so didn't know any different

I had a mate who told me he was dying once.

I had a mate who told me he was dying once.

 

What happened to him?

What happened to him?

Medical phenomenon I bet.

Lazarus.

What happened to him?

 

Went on to be a poor Jewish milkman.

Went on to be a roofer.

My mum and dad went to open night at farnworth grammar and the headmaster at time mr Gibson said if he had his way then all pupils would do Russian as a language cos we would need it in the future - liar,mind you it might have helped me on that Ukraine trip the