What's the best goal that you have ever scored. Not seen but actually stuck in the onion bag yourself.

 

Mine was as follows

 

I was stood on the corner of the 18 yard box waiting for a throw in. My first touch was, as ever, shite, so the ball looped up and away from me to my left. As it reached the apex of its loop, I volleyed it over my shoulder and into the top corner. We're talking Marco Van Basten.

 

I then nonchalantly walked back to half way line for the restart like I'd meant it all along and score them every day.

1-1, with a couple of minutes left against a team who were talented but also cocky pricks who never stopped talking, giving shit etc.

 

anyway, a corner came into the box but was headed out to the edge of the box were i was stood, dint even have time to think, it bounced just in front of me and i hit it on the up, almost fully expecting it to dissapear into the trees, but it rocketed into the top right hand corner!

 

the sweetest half-volley ive ever hit and unlike mickbrown i did not act so nonchalantly, i ran around like a fuckin cock calling each and every member of the opposition every name under the sun and then showed em my arse (not sure why)

 

i then got booked, but it was oh so worth it!!!

First ever goal, first ever game.

 

25 yarder, Chorley New Rd C.P vs Blackrod Church school

 

went 1 nil up

 

lost 7-1

undies once buried an absolute cracker against this shower called heaton casuals

 

shite they were, but the keeper thought he was something

 

made it all the more enjoyable

'Buried a cracker in the shower'

 

I don't wanna know about his sexual exploits thankyou

Away game, Bury Hotshots v Blackhorse with Mr The Greek playing central defence. We had a corner and I stayed back, the ball came out to me and I hit it from within the centre circle straight over the goalies head into the back of the net. The goal was then disallowed... for offside

'Buried a cracker in the shower'

 

 

you're obviously itk about who was in goal

 

and more to the point, undies sexploits

Theres just too many....

 

But, Scored the perfect hatrick in a 3-2 win against a select Junior Whites many years ago for Tempest Utd youth and made it into the matchday programme.

Middle of the opposition half, conrolled on the chest, then the knee then cracked (admitedly meant top be a punt back into the box) into the top corner SCORCHER!!!! :-SS'

NOT SPECTACULAR BUT MEMORABLE. A PENALTY AT HAMPDEN PARK AT HALF TIME IN THE BOLTON V QUEENS PARK PRE-SEASON FREINDLY.TOOK 3 ATTEMPTS{DUE TO ALCHOHOL} BUT GOT THERE IN THE END......

not a goal scored but saved for me

 

my moment came the other night where I'm goalie for our 5-a-side team

 

a shot was coming in towards my far post so I started to move in that direction, when it deflected off one of our lads to send it to the other corner, quick as you like I twisted my body and managed to get a dive in and mi hand down to the bottom right corner and palm it away

 

felt like doing a lap of honour

 

we're talking a cross between geoff banks and that one seamen did against sheff utd in the cup semis a couple of seasons ago

 

I can't remember many primary school goals but I probably nutmegged Horwich at some point because Chorley New Road were a right shower of shite at footy, as were Rivvy and Blackrod - the gaylords

Was you a "HOLY FAMILY" rent boy? Never played against you at junior school.

 

Played Joey's quite a few times at football.

 

Zico must have been shi.te coz he didnt play for the awesome HORWICH ST MARY'S.

i once chipped the keeper at 5 a side.

 

perfect little clip over his shoulder into far corner.

 

the fact i had beat 3 players to set the chance up adds to the story but the finish was walkeresque.

Was you a "HOLY FAMILY" rent boy? Never played against you at junior school.

 

Played Joey's quite a few times at football.

 

Zico must have been shi.te coz he didnt play for the awesome HORWICH ST MARY'S.

 

I went to Our Ladies on Chorley New Road, next to St Marys

 

I played for Horwich Tigers till they found out I was too old

 

they were gutted as I'd banged them in during pre-season

 

my debut goal was a 35 yard lob* against MorrisGreen**

 

*I was 13 so it could've been 10 yards, it's hard to judge at that age

 

** the U13s team, not Uncle 'Amptons 80s war buddy

i was original member of the "HORWICH TIGERS". team was made up of a loada kids who used to have a kick about on telford st field.

we always played better after watching jossie's giants and then going for a kick about.

 

you might be right about the distances, my 25 yarder could have been like 10yards.

Every goal I score is worthy of goal of the season.

 

Fenrik

we're talking a cross between geoff banks and that one seamen did against sheff utd in the cup semis a couple of seasons ago

 

I

 

Who did Geoff Banks play for?

i know that jeff banks makes clothes for sainsburys but geoff no idea!

Every goal I score is worthy of goal of the season.

 

Fenrik

 

Apart from that occasion you played in your slippers.

we're talking a cross between geoff banks and that one seamen did against sheff utd in the cup semis a couple of seasons ago

 

I

 

Who did Geoff Banks play for?

 

sorry, I forgot to mention I was wearing these

 

 

one for the ladies/Horwich there

 

Zico

Women use this board too

25 yard volley against Holy??Infants back in '83.

We lost 4-1 in a shock result.

does anyone remember the back heel go i scored behind on the pitch behind burnden ?

 

think i made a fool out of fenginiho.

I remember when Mr Anderson did a shot that cleared them 25ft nets on Leverhulme, we all laughed and then he walked off the pitch & went home!

My first against Barrow for WWXI was pretty damn spectacular =P~

 

best ever was first game of last season, got ball on left wing just in their half, took it round 2 then faked a shot, keeper went down and did a kinkladze-esque chip into the back of the net. :D/

under 12's vs radcliffe boro.

 

i had just had an argument with this fat bastard and told him so!

 

both got bolloked by the ref and the keeper took the goal kick. came to me about 35 yards volleyed it first time in the top corner.

 

turned around to see the fat fcuk on the floor crying :D/

undies once buried an absolute cracker against this shower called heaton casuals

 

shite they were, but the keeper thought he was something

 

made it all the more enjoyable

 

HMMMMMMMMMMMMM