Cheese

Wish I could, but I haven't got Sky.

FUCK WRAP

Which station do you listen to?

Apart from Dessert Island Discs, there are no songs on Radio 4. And the point of Dessert Island Discs is to hear the story behind each track the person picks, which is a lot different to listening to some gobby fuckwit playing the latest chart shit.

Excellent observation sir (regarding the Beetlejuice thing). I noticed that lads funny eyes a while back, but it seems to come and go. It's as if the director is giving him some direction off-camera, and his unprofessional eye has to concentrate on that while the professional one remains in character.

I'm 29 and listen to nothing but Radio 4. Why anyone would want to listen to other peoples' choices of music, I don't know.

3 episodes of Smell's traumatising face, and you're shocked by a rape scene?

Me too. I hate it with a passion. The Mrs loves it though, so she spends most of it moaning at me for being a miserable bastard. It's a vicious circle of grief.

It was Milky. Sure it showed his face.

Last nights was better, but still a bit too Shameless-eqsue. Particularly that bullshit bit at the beginning when they were singing outside at 4 in the morning. Not to mention the ridiculous way they made that little kid look like his real dad - complete with over-sized glasses, flat cap and fucking side-burns.

My first motor was a C reg Austin Metro, complete with manual choke. It was a hand-me-down from my mum. For reasons I never understood, the engine used to carry on spluttering for a good few minutes after turning the ignition off, but it got me and my mates to and from the snooker club for a couple of years, so it was a cracker as far as I was concerned.

That comedy bully is the spit of Jonny Briggs' older brother Albert. (Jonny Briggs as in the 80's kids tv programme that is).

The only Prem player I truly hate with an irrational passion is Gerrard.

Probably.

I was thinking the exact same thing this morning.

End of Harrisons career, no question. But for a payout like that, I'd gladly take a pummeling to the face and never have to go to work again.

TV for retards. It surely can't be as bad as GMTV though, can it? On the few occassions I've woken up and watched GMTV, within 10 minutes I've felt like smashing the tv and scraping my face off with the bits of broken screen.

Shoe polish.

Spot on. It doesn't take long for it to go from 'mildly amusing stunt show' to 'annoying Yank pricks screaming a lot'.

Good call. I know a few, and they're all utter knobs, for the exact same reasons you mention.

Police Traffic Wardens Rappers

Who'd have thought putting a cat in a wheelie bin would make you the next Ian Huntley? Something tells me the media are paying too much attention to fuckwits on facebook these days.

Ulrika Johnson still does it for me, which probably contradicts my previous comment.

No. Diane Oxberry looks like she's been vacuum packed.

I'm fairly sure the drummers are "special needs" type people.