Fuck knows what's actually in a Peperami.

 

108% pork

You find that a lot of processed meat products contain over 100g of "meat" per 100g of finished product.

 

Just think about taking 108g of unspecified pork matter and rendering it down: it'll weigh less than half.

 

Fuck knows what's actually in a Peperami.

is it a bit of an animal?

Yes, but it's a unspecified bit.

 

Possibly a pig's ear.

Hello from Peperami

 

Dear XXXX, Thank you for your recent query regarding the confusing labelling on Peperami. Under the labelling laws for processed meat products like sausages, we are required to state the amount of raw meat as a percentage of the finished product -including all the other ingredients like spices, salt etc. For raw sausages, the meat percentage will be less than 100% because other ingredients are added during manufacture. However, Peperami is a cured sausage and weight is lost through evaporation of water during manufacture. This means that the weight of the raw meat we put in before cooking and curing is higher than the weight of the finished Peperami that is sold. The meat content is therefore, more than 100%. As an example - a 25g Peperami is made with 27g of raw meat. I hope that this has helped and if you require any further information orassistance, then please do not hesitate to contact us.

 

Kind regards, Chantal Barnard

You find that a lot of processed meat products contain over 100g of "meat" per 100g of finished product.

 

Just think about taking 108g of unspecified pork matter and rendering it down: it'll weigh less than half.

 

Fuck knows what's actually in a Peperami.

 

Beef Jerky for one.

Dear Chantal,

 

HBAYT

 

Kind regards,

WW.

Yes, but it's a unspecified bit.

 

Possibly a pig's ear.

 

Aye, if you're lucky

I used to know a lad who worked at a place on Union Road where they made Pork Scratchings.

 

He used to tell us about the pig carcass coming from the abbertoir bereft of any useable meat. They would pretty much blast it with a high pressure jet-wash and throw the big bits into a deep fat fryer to make the scratchings. This was after they cut around the pig's anus and threw that in.

"Mechanically recovered meat"

 

Those who don't know of it: use the power of Google.

"Mechanically recovered meat"

 

Those who don't know of it: use the power of Google.

 

I watched a programme about it on Discovery Channel with the wife. At the end she went in the kitchen and threw out 5 tins of hot dogs. She heaves at the very thought of eating a hot dog now and never misses a chance to ask anyone eating one, "Do you know how they're made?"

 

Fucking embarassing at the football matches with them roll-over-dog things.

I watched a programme about it on Discovery Channel with the wife. At the end she went in the kitchen and threw out 5 tins of hot dogs. She heaves at the very thought of eating a hot dog now and never misses a chance to ask anyone eating one, "Do you know how they're made?"

 

Fucking embarassing at the football matches with them roll-over-dog things.

 

I suppose if folk knew the ingredients of black pudding,they probably wouldn't eat it again.Bit of an offal fan meself - Haggis/black pud/sausage etc.....bring it on

Back onto what sayings get on your tits, I have loads. "Epic." Especially when used in the context of an "epic fail."

 

On a Christmas theme, Santa. Why is everyone saying that yank term now? It's Father Christmas. The term "holidays" for the Christmas period. Also, not so much a spoken term, but when people type Xmas rather than Christmas. They're either lazy or scared stiff of offending none christians.

I would have thought Santa would be more of Germanic origin than American. Just saying like.

Xmas is a credible and acceptable shortening. Your RE teachers was having you on.

It was previously Father Christmas in the UK and Sinterklaas or Saint Nicholas in Europe. Santa Claus is the American name as far as I am aware.

 

 

I prefer Father Christmas as that was his name in the NB household in the 60s/70s, so yes, it gets on my nerves too.

Father Christmas in my house.

 

Although my lad calls him farmer Christmas

Back on to " Sayings That Get On Yer Tits '. Cold callers on the phone. " Hello are you the householder " ? No, its a fucking burgler.

Back on to " Sayings That Get On Yer Tits '. Cold callers on the phone. " Hello are you the householder " ? No, its a fucking burgler.

 

After my dad died I took on his house as well, anyway, there used to be cold calls all the time (he fell in their '+70 years old, perhaps we could bamboozle them?' category)

 

"Could I speak to Mr. ***** ********* please?".

 

I used to reply: "Well, I can take your details, and the next time I'm having a Seance..." or "Have you got a shovel?" Most hung up, but some of the thick f*ckers on the other end reeled off their details/enquired could they call again etc.

Edited December 18, 201114 yr by Youri McAnespie

After my dad died I took on his house as well, anyway, there used to be cold calls all the time (he fell in their '+70 years old, perhaps we could bamboozle them?' category)

 

"Could I speak to Mr. ***** ********* please?".

 

I used to reply: "Well, I can take your details, and the next time I'm having a Seance..." or "Have you got a shovel?" Most hung up, but some of the thick f*ckers on the other end reeled off their details/enquired could they call again etc.

I used to have a number to stop all these cold calling cunts, but its failed, only way round is slamming it down after a three second delay.

I used to have a number to stop all these cold calling cunts, but its failed, only way round is slamming it down after a three second delay.

 

My old man had subscribed to the Telephone Preference Service, I think you have to renew every few years. Also if you don't tick those boxes (which say: we may sell your details to every Tom, Dick and Harry - 'tick if you don't mind' or 'tick if you mind') when you give out details, then 'implied consent', or something like that, is given. If I wasn't feeling jovial/sick I'd just say nothing and quietly put the receiver down (on the table not the cradle) and leave 'em to it.

Edited December 18, 201114 yr by Youri McAnespie

I put the phone down at the side of the cradle and let them go on for a while. That way it's costing their company the telephone charges and them the time.

This has probably been put forward earlier but,

 

"End of"

 

Usually to reinforce a pathetic viewpoint and [an attempt] in preventing a retort.

"And Bolton find themselves two goals down at half-time"

when someone who isnt from bolton hears your bolton accent and they say peter kay jokes over and over "garlic bread!"

 

Go and fuck off.

if we go down, season tickets will be cheaper