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Wanderers Ways. Neil Thompson 1961-2021

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Spider Season

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I'm guessing it's started.

 

A Godless, scuttling octoped with eyes bigger than golf balls and the leg span of an A380 just cunted its way across the lounge.

 

Apparently they come indoors looking for sex. I reckon that one might bum me later.

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  • I like the wing mirror spiders, love taking them for a drive out somewhere they would not normally go to.

My dog eats them & daddy long legs too. She's some odd habits.

A Godless, scuttling octoped with eyes bigger than golf balls and the leg span of an A380 .

 

Apparently they come indoors looking for sex. 

 

So that's why you picked your username?!

Fucking monster living on my window.

Fuckers are huge!!! I never kill em. Pint glass over the top and sling em in the garden. One earlier today had its legs sticking out of the fucking glass

Sure they breed in my van. Forever chucking them out, but always more to replace them

Fuckers are huge!!! I never kill em. Pint glass over the top and sling em in the garden. One earlier today had its legs sticking out of the fucking glass

Buddha and BCG like this post.

 

I like Spiders, they serve a purpose and they aren't slimey.  It's slugs and worms that need banishing from the earth.

And wasps.

 

They are just wankers.

Buddha and BCG like this post.

 

I like Spiders, they serve a purpose and they aren't slimey.  It's slugs and worms that need banishing from the earth.

 

Amen

And wasps.

 

They are just wankers.

 Correction. They are vicious bastard cunts who will harm and scare you for no other reason than they can

 

Got one stuck in my shirt sleeve last summer in a beer garden. Fucking thickshit mate batted me on the arm to try to get it out. 6 stings all down my arm. I looked a right twat leaping all over the place and whining like a baby

And wasps.

 

They are just wankers.

Yes, wasps also.

 

I bloody love Bees though.  In summer, I have about 100+ in my front garden.  No problem at all.  Gets on my nerves when people start panicking and flailing their arms about because there's a bee within 10m.

I'm guessing it's started.

 

A Godless, scuttling octoped with eyes bigger than golf balls and the leg span of an A380 just cunted its way across the lounge.

 

Apparently they come indoors looking for sex. I reckon that one might bum me later.

 

Ha, take it you googled it too.

 

I'm over run with the fuckers, but decided to just leave em tio it, the dirty bastards

I don't fancy a ginger Horwich dwelling bloke coming in my house trying to bum me.

 

I've had worse offers, like. But still, you could at least take me out for a meal first.

Buddha and BCG like this post.

 

I like Spiders, they serve a purpose and they aren't slimey. It's slugs and worms that need banishing from the earth.

There's hundreds of slugs appearing each night round here

 

What do they offer

I tried to pick one of the massive ones up yesterday and it gripped the rug so hard its leg came off in my hand. And then the fucker grabbed it back from me with its remaining seven. It's even nabbed the remote tonight and put Dave+1 on.

There's hundreds of slugs appearing each night round here

 

What do they offer

Nightmares

My dog eats them & daddy long legs too. She's some odd habits.

 

apparently those weird daddy long legs with a tiny round body and no wings you find in the garden are highly poisonous if eaten.

 

As for slugs they get fuckin everywhere, found one in my car this mornin, how the fuck it got in has me baffled. 

Slugs in the house......

 

worse is when you stand on one in the morning in bare feet :angry2:

apparently those weird daddy long legs with a tiny round body and no wings you find in the garden are highly poisonous if eaten.

 

As for slugs they get fuckin everywhere, found one in my car this mornin, how the fuck it got in has me baffled.

 

I'll keep my eye on her with those then, ta. She's a right scratter when we're out, it's embarrassing as it's not like she doesn't get well fed.

 

And slugs, fucking horrible things. Someone once told me they're for the birds in the food chain but if that were true why do the bastards only come out at night when the birds are fast a bo bo?

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It's just sat there in the corner, plotting.

 

From its weird, jerky movements I assume it's having a wank. I'm also fairly sure it has a swastika tattooed on its thorax.

 

They can fuck off for me.

I'll keep my eye on her with those then, ta. She's a right scratter when we're out, it's embarrassing as it's not like she doesn't get well fed.

 

And slugs, fucking horrible things. Someone once told me they're for the birds in the food chain but if that were true why do the bastards only come out at night when the birds are fast a bo bo?

 

wifey now tells me the wingless daddy long leg poison thing is a myth. however the slugs are a mess, birds don't even eat em, heard hedgehogs do but they seemed to have disappeared.

Oh. My. God.  What did I just read.  Only 5% above the ground??  I'm moving on top of a mountain, to a house on stilts (in saucers of beer).  There were bloody 100's here last autumn.

Slugs eat dog shit

 

That's all you need to know

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