fishbulb

But you're missing gems like this: http://boards.rivals.net/default.asp?sid=1...ytoid=533130656

1-0 us. Scorer? Er, Okocha - he's due one!

'Bout time we gave somebody a spanking!!

Calp?

With Zozzy and pb on this one. NOT KEANE at all.

Nowt to do with me but if anyone is interested: http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/New-Reebok-Bolton-Ho...1QQcmdZViewItem

Looks like somebody's drawn a beard on Tiger Woods!

Me & No.1 child plus 2 will be going. Feeling a leeetle bit apprehensive about this one.

They can feckin' have the tw@ , for me.

Best have a look at the last sentence too, mate!

What's the betting on the headline 'Del boy: Trotter' appearing in the tabloids?

If I was a pedant (and brave) I'd point out that EG missed a fullstop out of that last sentence ... :-$

I think his point went a bit to shit when he mentioned Sourpuss!

I'll be avoiding the Town Hall steps just in case...

Anyone got one I can use as a background ont' PC? Used the one off BBC but it's too pixilated when you stretch it (missus).

http://www.manchesteronline.co.uk/sport/fo...ded_chants.html I vote yes! Then every visiting club can take the p1ss.

www.gamebooker.co.uk

... or he'll come after you with the swords of a thousand men.

Any chance of playing The Clash's 'Should I stay or should I go' for a short, bald Greek mate of mine?

T'isn't. It's OPEN or so I'm told.

He could start by not putting squares all over the place.

QANTAS AIRLINES After every flight, pilots fill out a form called a gripe sheet which conveys to the mechanics problems encountered with the aircraft during the flight that need repair or correction. The mechanics read and correct the problem, and then respond in writing on the lower half of the form what remedial action was taken, and the pilot reviews the gripe sheets before the next flight. Never let it be said that ground crews and engineers lack a sense of humour. Here are some actual logged maintenance complaints and problems as submitted by Qantas pilots and the solution recorded by maintenance engineers. By the way, Qantas is the only major airline that has never had an accident. P = the problem logged by the pilot.) S = the solution and action taken by the engineers.) P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough. S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft. P: Something loose in cockpit. S: Something tightened in cockpit. P: Dead bugs on windshield. S: Live bugs on back-order. P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent. S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground. P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear. S: Evidence removed. P: DME volume unbelievably loud. S: DME volume set to more believable level. P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick. S: That's what they're there for. P: IFF inoperative. S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode. P: Suspected crack in windshield. S: Suspect you're right. P: Number 3 engine missing. S: Engine found on right wing after brief search. P: Aircraft handles funny. S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious. P: Target radar hums. S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics. P: Mouse in cockpit. S: Cat installed. P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer. S: Took hammer away from midget.

Starts with 'R' and ends with 'ivaldo'...