I had a dream that I put sugar in Kevin Davies brew the other night, and woke up in Bolton Royal Infirmary 3 days later. I don't even live in Bolton.

Not living in Bolton is the least of your concerns - you'd need to go back in time also.

 

I didn't think dreams had to be current. I think Cheese is quite entitled to be visiting BRI in a dream.

Apologies, I was born in Bolton Royal, and it's just by habit that I refer to Royal Bolton hospital as such.

 

Also, thanks MickyD, but I was trying to insinuate that SKD twatted me in a dream but, such is his hardness, I woke up in hospital in real life. Clearly a shit attempt at humour.

Edited October 14, 201015 yr by Cheese

he didn't cry after Richard LOgan beat the crap out of him in the back of the net during The Battle Of Saltergate

"The two No 6s [Carr and James] were having a boxing match in the net and the two No 8s [Davies and Logan] were exchanging blows outside the area."

...Freddy Krueger has nightmares about him.

He relieves his itchy piles by eating raw rotten chicken with broken pint pots, so he can shit glass diarrhea.

 

 

....he'd dive in on and foul Brixton the daubhill dribbler

 

Oh no, wait, that was someone else...

...he doesn't turn the central heating on until November at the earliest.

 

Unlike my missus who thinks warming the whole of South Lancashire from September onwards is a good idea.

...he doesn't turn the central heating on until November at the earliest.

 

Unlike my missus who thinks warming the whole of South Lancashire from September onwards is a good idea.

 

walked into our front room 2day had the fire on, and the radiator for fucks sake!

 

anyways back on topic, SKD is so hard he eats a pot noodle raw.pot included.

Edited October 14, 201015 yr by Frandsen08

he stubbs his little toe on the bottom of door casings and skirting boards because he loves it and also trods on upturned plugs just for a laugh...

....he'd dive in on and foul Brixton the daubhill dribbler

 

Oh no, wait, that was someone else...

 

funny as fuck

 

seems a long time ago

... the next Rambo film is being renamed DAVIES

....he'd dive in on and foul Brixton the daubhill dribbler

 

Oh no, wait, that was someone else...

 

archive footage found of the said challenge

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SqYEpVjpinI

He performed the snip on himself with nothing but a drinking straw.

 

 

He was on United flight 93 on 9/11 and was the only passenger to walk away saying "fucking ragheads, where's the nearest taxi rank?".

He's that hard, he holds his piss in and only goes to the toilet when he's on holiday

archive footage found of the said challenge

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SqYEpVjpinI

 

it was only a weee poooosh

He once had root canal surgery done without anesthetic. He also once sewed his own ear back on following a fight with a bear, and

can hold his testes in naked flame for two minutes without flinching.

He did the Antarctic crossing in just a pair of Y-Fronts and flip-flops. No food, no tent, no dogs or sledge. He actually thought he was being a bit of a whimp for taking a toothpick with him in case he came face to face with a polar bear!

For his summer holidays, he drives across the sahara desert in one of these wearing nothing but Y fronts and a pair of shitflickers.

 

 

 

 

He once had root canal surgery done without anesthetic.

I had that done once, it really fucking hurt. The dentist told me it was "all in my mind" as the tooth was dead. Anyway, when he got down the the root and pulled it out on one of those little screw/drills they use he said "Oh sorry, it seems it's still a live root...sorry about that"

He once had root canal surgery done without anesthetic. He also once sewed his own ear back on following a fight with a bear, and

can hold his testes in naked flame for two minutes without flinching.

How was the bear?

How was the bear?

 

Extinct in this country now, coincidence?

When thieves realised they'd stole SKD''s car outside of the Reebok, they returned it after having it valeted, waxed, serviced & with a years free petrol before handing themselves in to the police.

He can shoot fire out of his cock

He's eaten one of Satan's nagas and described it as "tickly"

Edited October 16, 201015 yr by Spider