Best invention ever

 

We have 1 on every floor in our office and today i was busting for a shat and out of the 3 traps available the 2 outside ones were full and i didn't want to sit in the middle so i sneaked into the disabled 1 which is seperate from the main shathouse.

Fuck me it was like shatting in heaven, loads of leg room, comfy seat and loads of soft bog roll available it even has 1 of those electric smelly things on the wall that automatically send out a lovely oudor every couple of minutes, i could've stayed in there all day and when i eventually finished it had a store away arm that i could use to lift myself up, fucking brilliant i can't wait for tomorrow

 

Only down side is that when i washed my hands my bollocks got wet and i looked like i'd pissed myself   

Thinly veiled "I have to have sit down wee wees at my age"

Best for tramming in public houses.

You feel a bit of a twat when you leave if there's a real disabled person (as opposed to pretend or slightly - delete as applicable) waiting to use it, especially if they're in a chair.

 

I always take a pair of shinnies out with me, I don them before using the disabled bogs, then, when I leave, if there's a disabled person waiting and giving me a filthy look (the wrong kind of filthy look) I give them an aggrieved ''I am disabled!'' and rap my knuckles on one of the concealed shinnies.

Edited October 15, 201411 yr by Youri McAnespie

MR58, how many disabled folk work at your place apart from you? It's worrying when I thought there's just you, are there others?

 

P.S. Plopping at work should only be done when you're feeling a bit poorly

Edited October 15, 201411 yr by no balls

What if you're 'coming up' on Ecstasy and caught short with the need for an E-Dump?

What if you're 'coming up' on Ecstasy and caught short with the need for an E-Dump?

Where do you work?

Es-Paradis (or somewhere else if that isn't going anymore):

 

 

A mate once gave a lecture (to adults btw) after popping an E to give themself a bit of confidence, it didn't go well.

. Plopping at work should only be done when you're feeling a bit poorly

 

Rubbish

 

One of lifes great pleasures is knowing you're getting paid for having a dump

You two have had this debate on here more times than soft mick!

 

#teampooatwork

You're right Stevie

 

I also recall MR58 once being appalled at one of his colleagues dumping and not washing their hands

You're right Stevie

 

I also recall MR58 once being appalled at one of his colleagues dumping and not washing their hands

And for once he'd be right!

What if you're 'coming up' on Ecstasy and caught short with the need for an E-Dump?

Ha ha - I've never understood quite why tgat happens. We refer to it as 'the quickening'.

Serotonin is produced largely in the gastro-intestinal tract, the 're-ordering' of the chain initiated by taking MDMA produces a discombobulation which in turn stimulates the need to poo, sometimes...

 

I thought you were a man of medicine or fellow quack, Kent?

Edited October 15, 201411 yr by Youri McAnespie

with in 5 mins of wakeing in a morning i shit then thats me done for the day unless i have had a indian

Which is inconvenient considering you don't get up for 10 minutes after you wake up!

Rubbish

 

One of lifes great pleasures is knowing you're getting paid for having a dump

It's well known where I work that I won't crimp one off on the works toilet, instead I go home if I need a shit.

 

It's even better knowing I'm being paid to drive home, then back to work in a company vehicle to have a dump.

 

I love my job!

It's well known where I work that I won't crimp one off on the works toilet, instead I go home if I need a shit.

 

It's even better knowing I'm being paid to drive home, then back to work in a company vehicle to have a dump.

 

I love my job!

But you work in scotland and live in Cornwall.

To be fair, I only live half a mile from work.

You're right Stevie

 

I also recall MR58 once being appalled at one of his colleagues dumping and not washing their hands

Hope he at least washed his feet.

To be fair, I only live half a mile from work.

Why ?? We collect the aerosols out of the spray thingys in the bogs so instead of the stench of rotten intestines it smells of a market box of oranges

For an awful moment when I saw this thread title, I thought someone had taken Burndens Bogs on a stroll out of the town centre up COR like I did a few years ago.

 

Poor fucker resembled a raspberry ripple for the next few days. Definitely a non-yomper and I thought one of you had severely damaged him by asking him to take more than 7 consecutive steps.

 FFS Bolts, how many times do I have to explain that a combination of new boots and 15 pints doesn't endear me to yomping!

A year or three of cycling up to Winter hill mast and Rivvy pike on a regular basis,has transformed me into a lean mean fighting machine!

You're right Stevie

 

I also recall MR58 once being appalled at one of his colleagues dumping and not washing their hands

He'd had a dump in the bog next to me that didn't have any loo roll and then got up flushed and walked out the dirty bastard

 

Anyhow

 

This morning when i got in the office 1 of the fit birds came out of the same disabled bog so i quickly put my stuff on my desk and went back to the same bog and sat down on the warm seat, and i didn't even have a shit.

This morning when i got in the office 1 of the fit birds came out of the same disabled bog so i quickly put my stuff on my desk and went back to the same bog and sat down on the warm seat, and i didn't even have a shit.

You're my hero

 

That's fantastic behaviour