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Wanderers Ways. Neil Thompson 1961-2021

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Don't one arrow terracotta plant pots.

Was doing a job yesterday, which involved taking plants out of pots and putting them in the ground.

One pot is a terracotta job; some damage and cracks but largely intact. 

She can't get the plant out, so lad decides to do his finest Tyson Fury impression.

The fucker didn't break, whereas his knuckle did. Knobhead. 🤪

The joys of being 17.

Any other mentalist teen injuries?

Featured Replies

I broke my coccyx trying to jump into a moving car like it was the Dukes of Hazard.

Missed by a mile and landed on the edge of the kerb full on my bum bone.

Hurts like fuck I tell you.

5 minutes ago, Spider said:

I broke my coccyx trying to jump into a moving car like it was the Dukes of Hazard.

Missed by a mile and landed on the edge of the kerb full on my bum bone.

Hurts like fuck I tell you.

Starsky or Hutch did that too. Blonde one 

  • Author
7 minutes ago, Spider said:

I broke my coccyx trying to jump into a moving car like it was the Dukes of Hazard.

Missed by a mile and landed on the edge of the kerb full on my bum bone.

Hurts like fuck I tell you.

Always remember primary school teacher warning us about landing on the coccyx. Kids pulling chairs from under each other as they were sitting down displeased him, so he said it can kill you. True or not, it stuck.

18 minutes ago, Spider said:

I broke my coccyx trying to jump into a moving car like it was the Dukes of Hazard.

Missed by a mile and landed on the edge of the kerb full on my bum bone.

Hurts like fuck I tell you.

Did you jump up and carry on as if nothing had happened ?

Gave my mate a backie on my bmx. He said what would you do if I tried to put you in a sleeper hold, I said this

Tried bunny hopping the kerb, hit it wrong, ended up with the uncovered handlebar into my stomach muscle, pissing out claret , and my mate knocked out on the middle of the road. Luckily it was down the hill to the hospital from plodder lane. I ended up with stitches in my stomach my mate ended up with stitches in his forehead. 
 

Good times. 

Trying to fit pallets in a van,  and the last one wouldn't quite fit. I'm lifting it trying to gently move it in and tge customer kicks the bottom and jams my hand.. 3 dislocated fingers and one broken.. thankfully on my left (cack) hand. 

We had a race as kids on our BMXs across a carpark that had a tight downhill turn, everyone who knew took it wide and careful as it was slippy as fuck with loose gravel, novice dickhead here ended up in Bolton Royal.

Broke my coccyx after getting the ex to take off my knee high boots (off me) pissed up and fell on my arse on my tiled floor. 

I sat and cried for about 20 minutes. Think he pissed off to bed. 

Also jumped over a wall playing with lads not realising it had barbed wire across it. Split my lip in half. Dad nearly passed out from the blood. I was more arsed about having blood on my reebok classics. 

8yrs old, flying about on bikes with mates, misjudged a corner & ploughed straight into a wall...shot forward off the seat onto the frame & played a cannon & knocked both balls into the same sack, never known pain like it!! 

      Glad I had no idea about the joys of sex back then or I would have cried even more 😁

  

Edited by RONNIE PHILLIPS

17 minutes ago, RONNIE PHILLIPS said:

8yrs old, flying about on bikes with mates, misjudged a corner & ploughed straight into a wall...shot forward off the seat onto the frame & played a cannon & knocked both balls into the same sack, never known pain like it!! 

      Glad I had no idea about the joys of sex back then or I would have cried even more 😁

  

Like this? 

 

  • Author

Goes through me that vid.

We've all mis judged stuff on a bike, but that looks sore!

Jumped through a chemist window, 14 stitches in my elbow. Was my first night out with our peg. She waited in A&E with me all night then I went straight to V99.

 

 

4 minutes ago, gonzo said:

Jumped through a chemist window, 14 stitches in my elbow. Was my first night out with our peg. She waited in A&E with me all night then I went straight to V99.

 

 

The fuckin irony 😂

1 hour ago, bolton_blondie said:

Like this? 

 

I think I made more of a fuss!!! 😁😁

1 hour ago, bolton_blondie said:

Like this? 

 

Having the doctor pop it back wasn't fun either!! 

Not me but a lad I worked with. 
both 1st year apprentices in plant hire. 
tasked with rebuilding an engine from a generator. 
had it on the test bench and started it up, minus the generator,  little trickle of oil on the outside edge of the wheel, because we’ve not put the seal in quite right . 
flywheel going so fast on a running engine can look still and the film of oil just making a complete ring around the edge .
even struggling to type this as I remember him putting his finger in a rag and on to the flywheel to wipe it off . Last thing he ever did with the tip of that finger and not much else with that hand for a while 🤢 

the generator did get fixed and go out and earn though 

Dad had a portacabin dropped on his finger whilst pushing it into place on a site. De-sleeved it and passed out. Kept it in a jar the dirty bastard and every year we get to see a pic of it on its anniversary 🤢

Edited by bolton_blondie

I once got a nasty papercut. Stung for days.

46 minutes ago, Not in Crawley said:

I once got a nasty papercut. Stung for days.

See, now we're talking about real pain.
Standing on a plug/lego type of pain.

12 minutes ago, Traf said:

See, now we're talking about real pain.
Standing on a plug/lego type of pain.

I once had my Mrs moaning in my ear constantly about the pain of labour for 4 days whilst she got free drugs to sleep and rest and I had to pay hospital prices for food and drinks. 

And I couldn't read my Thursday paper until Sunday when she got an epidural. 

Fucking liberties 

57 minutes ago, stevieb said:

I once had my Mrs moaning in my ear constantly about the pain of labour for 4 days whilst she got free drugs to sleep and rest and I had to pay hospital prices for food and drinks. 

And I couldn't read my Thursday paper until Sunday when she got an epidural. 

Fucking liberties 

Poor woman. Mine was a breeze. Women hate me when I say that 😂😂

3 minutes ago, bolton_blondie said:

Poor woman. Mine was a breeze. Women hate me when I say that 😂😂

Like a clowns pocket I’ve heard 

Like a wizard's sleeve down in the village.

  • Author

No magic in the village.

More likely to be a badly packed kebab.

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