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Wanderers Ways. Neil Thompson 1961-2021

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Seagull Defence....

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Popping Candy, they love the taste, but it fucks with their insides.

 

Allegedly.

 

Oh, they don't like hot oil tipping on them either. (so I might have read somewhere)

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  • You need a theme tune. Itll help cement your identity as different to the SSASG  

  • Years ago I was in Conwy. It was a beautiful day so the pub in the harbour was rammed. After about half an hour of queueing I triumphantly returned from the bar. I'd not even had a sip before a laser

on the WW's piss up can we put some of these exploding seagulls theories into practice?

Gonzo, that made me do a snorty laugh. Nob! :)

Stopped off in Dublin after Sporting game,was stood at bus stop when one shit over my new crombie.The fucking evil cunt laughed louder than everyone else.Fucking vermin.

Have you ever noticed how, when a gull shits on you, there's always some fucker who pops up unexpectedly, in the manner of that fucker who always stopped Mr Benn mid-adventure, to tell you how lucky it its to be covered in shit?

 

Where do these harbingers of good luck come from?

I like Seagulls. I suspect that they are just looking for some 'higher plane of existence'

Aren't we all?

(great little novel, Jonathan Livingston Seagull)

There were 10 blackpool seagulls in the air...

 

There were 10 blackpool seagulls in the air...

 

There were 10 blackpool seagulls

 

10 blackpool seagulls

 

10 blackpool seagulls in the air

 

And the sdl by gonzo shot one down

Hate the bastards too, last time I was in fleetwood I went to the chippy on the seafront and as soon as i'd put the fish and chips down, one of the bastards swooped down and took half the fish away

 

 

here's another of em pinching

 

Chris Eagles, he hates Seagulls

Hate the bastards too, last time I was in fleetwood I went to the chippy on the seafront and as soon as i'd put the fish and chips down, one of the bastards swooped down and took half the fish away

 

 

here's another of em pinching

 

Chris Eagles, he hates Seagulls

Its because he is the only Eagle that would get twatted off one.

SDL intelligence reports the seagulls are mobbing up for a practice raid on a northern town easter friday. Be on your guard

Gonzo, you are mad as a box of frogs

When I was little, I was feeshin' at Starmount- catching fook all.

One of the bastards flew down and grabbed a fish off the surface.

 

My brother was not amused, and when it came back he fired off a pebble with his maggapult.

 

TWAT!, right under it's wing- it left.

 

Now then, arm yourselves with maggapults (not an offensive weapon) and seasides usually have pebbles about.

Put a few in to get a spread and fire away

  • Author

SDL intelligence reports the seagulls are mobbing up for a practice raid on a northern town easter friday. Be on your guard

 

thanks for the information GG....

 

Now things have hotted up a little over the last couple of days....

 

since the formation of the SDL and things going viral,ive received letters off the police,the NSPB,and the Seagull protection alliance (SPA),Warning me that if any harm is done to seagulls in connection with the SDL we will face heavy prosecution....i say bring it on.

 

im in the process of arranging our first march....

 

now its currently the beginning of nesting season,which is the most violent time for this scum,they move inland and the SSA'S go crazy.people are scarred to walk the streets.

 

i plan for our first march to take place in thornton-cleveleys where i live.now you may think why would i do it so close to home,but im right in the epi-center here,and i know these streets....we are going to hit these fuckers right where it hurts.

 

we are going to march right on the tail end of nesting season.you see at the end of nesting season,the adults teach the young how to fly.now ive seen with my own eyes this process,the adults take the young and place them on the ground and leave them to try and fly.ive seen families gather round to watch this and remark how 'cute it all is'!....un-fucking-believable!!.....its a training exercise you dimwits!

 

this is where the gulls are learning the skills and all they need to know in carrying out SSA'S And other extreme activities.

 

now inteligence has suggested to me that there are various seagull safe houses,training camps and seagull places of worship(also knows as nests) dotted around this area.

 

my plan is to strike at dusk,just when this flight training exercise is under way....

 

now my organisation has been accused of being right wings...i refute this completely,i love animals.but these beasts are not animals..they are scum.seagull scum.

 

i cant say that anyone else in our group isnt right wings,and i dont condone it,but i cant control our members beliefs.

 

our dress code is simple...black or navy and if you can get hold of one of the CP Jackets with the goggles in the hood thats a bonus.

 

so thats it men and women,lets show the gulls we mean buisness,and hopefully they will get the message and fuck off back where they came from (the beach) and stop spreading thei extreme seagull beliefs ...

 

watch out for the dates people.

 

and can i just say i dont condone any violence towards this filth,but im not in controll of our members....

 

'seag-hail seag-hail seag-hail'

Admiral Gonzo

 

I've had a thought if I may be so bold

 

These irritant pests deserve a punishment ironic of them and their crimes

 

So

 

How about an elite squadron headed up by LW sneaks up on their blindside and gets them in a suitable manner....by seagulling them

 

Pre attack training is simply no shivering one's timber for 2 weeks to gain maximum coverage

 

I suggest a pincer movement with a lone ranger in squadron 2...a cum-Rambo if you like.....this is where our secret weapon George comes into play (he must be on his own due to his well documented poor control, but estimates make out he's heavy enough to take many out on his own)

 

We will jizz them on the beaches

 

  • Author

at ease corp darby....

 

now 'seagulling the seagulls'?.....i like it,i like it a a lot.

 

full tanks like you say to a cause a full dousing.

 

it is would be the most severe insult to their faith (gullism) and their book of faith jonathan livingston 'seagull'.

 

now obviously as the leader of the SDL i do not condone such acts,but i can not beheld responsable over the actions of our members.

 

during my research on these beasts,ive noticed some celebrity backers to this horrible faith.

 

the once great neil diamond being the most high profile....its true,believe me.

 

well done corp darby good work.

 

the quest continues.

 

#SEAGY2012

  • Author

LW is already in trainning for his first seagulling mission..

 

669__0ee877d43d75bc22173bcd45829eb779.jpg?1266566933

coffee all over the keyboard Gonzo!

Two training videos for you.

 

Firstly, how to catch them alive, you can then either ransom them or torture them for further info.

 

 

And how to get them Mad Max style.

 

 

Hope this helps.

We shall go on to the end, we shall fight in Fleetwood,

we shall fight on the seas and oceans,

we shall fight with growing confidence and growing strength in the air, we shall defend our Promanade, whatever the cost may be,

we shall fight on the beaches,

we shall fight on the landing grounds,

we shall fight in the fields and in the streets,

we shall fight in the hills;

we shall never surrender

  • 2 months later...
  • Author

Got blind-sided by one the fuckers again today....

 

Wanker swooped down bashed my head a shite all over my back...

 

All this in the presence of my wife and child.

 

I had to run for cover and hide in Sainsburrys doorway.

 

Wankers.

LW is already in trainning for his first seagulling mission..

 

669__0ee877d43d75bc22173bcd45829eb779.jpg?1266566933

:thumbsup: first i have seen that

gonzo and his dog - Dastardly and Muttley ?

 

the new rage for WAGS with fuck all else to spend their shag gotten gains on is buying pots of birdshit for their skin,supposed to be the new botox.

a new moneymaking scheme for you gonzo,rich pluckings to be made with your feathered friends

I can't summon up the hatred for seagulls I feel for fucking squirrels.

 

You hate squirrels??? I love them!

You hate squirrels??? I love them!

T

 

They've cost us literally thousands in the last few years in roof repairs etc. Those grey ones are horrible bullying American rats with tails!

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