You can do 3 things.

 

For me :-

 

1) go and see the people I've hurt in my life and say sorry.

2) go and see all my family and give them a hug and a kiss.

3) get myself a huge bag of coke and a bus load of high class escorts.

I can confirm that Little Whitt is alive and well.

 

He's just sent me a holiday snap from Down Under.

 

All the morons should now do the decent thing and jump into the nearest volcano

All the morons should now do the decent thing and jump into the nearest volcano

 

panic over, turns out they've found another calendar

 

and it wasn't the mayans predicting the end of the world, but those who interpreted it

 

http://digitaljournal.com/article/324711

 

end of the day, it's nt different to the bible - plenty of folk think Jesus and God exists off the back of that - the only difference is, they've not got the balls to choose deadlines for shit to happen, otherwise they'll look like nobs as well

Booooooooooooooooooooooo!

 

Mayans Out.

Still here by the way.

 

Contemplating whether this is a good thing when I read Diddles inane ramblings.

fucked off now, gotta pay fuckin bills

fucked off now, gotta pay fuckin bills

 

on the plus side, you might win the Euromillions later tonight...

on the plus side, you might win the Euromillions later tonight...

 

Unlikely, the Greeks have put a claim in.

fucked off now, gotta pay fuckin bills

 

 

Kill all hippies.

 

 

 

Missed a good discount on Scootering magazine thanks to them gormless twats.

For fucks sake

 

Them fucking scousers will get Xmas number 1 now

 

 

Fed up with people going on about it like there's no tomorrow.

Fed up with people going on about it like there's no tomorrow.

 

Very good, sir.

I can confirm that Little Whitt is alive and well.

 

He's just sent me a holiday snap from Down Under.

 

By the sound of it he spends a lot of time "down under"

...plenty of folk think Jesus and God exists off the back of that - the only difference is, they've not got the balls to choose deadlines for shit to happen, otherwise they'll look like nobs as well

 

I'm pretty sure that there was a Jesus. There was also a Jesus, an odd fellow, round Great Lever too. He once removed his floorboards and started digging the foundations of his living room "To make the ceiling higher..." Everyone could see his excavations because he didn't have curtains, anyway he hit a water pipe with the pneumatic - instant indoor paddling pool!

 

This was Jesus of G/L, not Jesus of Nazareth by the way.

 

Edit: He also had a big blue elephant painted directly on his living room wall (frescoed to be exact), perhaps he was the one Animist mentioned in the census?

Edited December 21, 201213 yr by Youri McAnespie

I'm pretty sure that there was a Jesus.

 

Aye ok, i accept he was knocking about and if he was real he was the best prophet with most convincing stories of the time but his birth, acts in life and death are very questionable

I've just seen a UFO-Shit!

 

 

Aye ok, i accept he was knocking about and if he was real he was the best prophet with most convincing stories of the time but his birth, acts in life and death are very questionable

 

Dunno.

 

I've collapsed in a heap and woke up 2 days later many times before now.

 

It's the 500 year old bloke building a boat on page 3 of the bible that makes me thinks its a load of old bollocks.

For fucks sake

 

Them fucking scousers will get Xmas number 1 now

 

On that

 

Wasn't this record to pay for legal fees?

 

And did I hear today that the government is gonna pay all their legal fees?

 

I've also read that its public prosecution so we foot the bill for the fees anyway?

 

I'm confused

Edited December 21, 201213 yr by HomerJay

Dunno.

 

I've collapsed in a heap and woke up 2 days later many times before now.

 

It's the 500 year old bloke building a boat on page 3 of the bible that makes me thinks its a load of old bollocks.

 

How do you explain The Grand Canyon then? He (Noah) chose baby animals to go on the Ark, and only land ones - insects, fish and birds were OK as they could fly (or swim). There were less species of animals too back then.

I'd probably put the Grand Canyon down to some kind of geological activity over a couple of million years or so, with the odd ice age thrown in for good measure.

 

It could be a completely wild and random guess though.

 

I'm pretty sure it didn't piss down one day and whilst driving along with his horses and pigs, it suddenly appeared like this.

 

It did, to punish the sinful.

 

Edit: The bloke above had probably just been betraying his wife with a paid, painted harlot.

Edited December 21, 201213 yr by Youri McAnespie

See thats whats so fucking annoying about the bible and religeon, its always taking the moral high ground with whatever happens.

 

Rained for 40 days and 40 nights? Nowt to do with weather patterns.Oh no. Farmer Joshuas been fucking his camels again.

 

Calling a dozen mates together for a sit down dinner, preeching that he'd be betrayed by some of them that night? Too fucking right, they wanted to be down Jerusalem slapping some whores tits whilst they snort lemongrass off their cocks or sommat, not sat with that patronising sandal wearing bearded minge eytin lentil soup and stale bread.

 

Born in a stable. Aye right. Fucking council house scutter, his Dad should have got off his arse, plenty of work for joiners in them days building huts shacks and wardrobes.

 

And as for the 'Virgin' Mary. Aye, righto. Dirty bitch had been at it with the firewood mon.

 

Big load of old cunt it is.

Drugs? Whoremongering?

 

You probably think it's alright for 'A Man to lyeth with another man' too - well it isn't, it is creating an abummer nation and they'll all end up in the lake of fire.