Slow news day? The real deal? End of the world? 
 

They’re saying it probably came from an animal, has Somebody been shagging monkeys again? 

12 minutes ago, Not in Crawley said:

Yes, just enjoying the good weather and taking some beers, saying it'll be 23 degrees tomorrow and wednesday in central London. Might make our way to Primrose Hill or Granary Square - you've got to work out the triangulation of Supermarket, Toilets, Green Space you are allowed to drink in. Every park is going to be rammed with that weather and being allowed to meet people. I suspect the inevitable headlines with photos of London Parks/Brighton beach will pop up no doubt.

For the other half's birthday pubs will be open for takeaway's and the Old Neptune in Whitstable is right on the beach so I'm hoping that it'll be open. If not I've still got a few bottles of champagne and a F&M hamper for lunch. 

Not much in the hamper for 100 notes.

1 minute ago, leigh white said:

Not much in the hamper for 100 notes.

That is very true, but they are all nice, plus I'm getting a seafood platter to go with lunch as well, so this is mainly for after the boat trip for snacks. You also get the hamper and having got a few of these in house (xmas work gifts) are really useful for keeping yer linen in.

4 minutes ago, leigh white said:

Not much in the hamper for 100 notes.

How do you make a meal with that poncey crap?

Especially as the guestlist dietary requirements for NiC's soiree probably make yon man t'other week with his cultured veg and Orlando Bloom look like types who'd eat 10p Whoops! butties and a bag of Beef Space Raiders washed down with a can of Tango.

Besides, I reckon' Fortnum and Mason hampers are just trampy cunts idea of luxury.

Like plastinated yoof think Cristal and Chambord is classy and thick fuckers think Stephen Fry is dead clever.

1 minute ago, Youri McAnespie said:

How do you make a meal with that poncey crap?

Especially as the guestlist dietary requirements for NiC's soiree probably make yon man t'other week with his cultured veg and Orlando Bloom look like types who'd eat 10p Whoops! butties and a bag of Beef Space Raiders washed down with a can of Tango.

Besides, I reckon' Fortnum and Mason hampers are just trampy cunts idea of luxury.

Like plastinated yoof think Cristal and Chambord is classy and thick fuckers think Stephen Fry is dead clever.

At a guess, a Youri picnic hamper would be a carrier big containing:

Strong Polish lager

Pays d’Turpentine

Skips

Soreen

6 hard boiled eggs

a lettuce

 

 

9 minutes ago, Spider said:

At a guess, a Youri picnic hamper would be a big carrier bag containing:

Strong Polish lager.

EFA.

One of my skinflint tricks when 'courting' and relatively skint would be to whisk the lucky girl up to the fields between Walker Fold Lane and Barrow Bridge with a load of food and booze from M&S...

Was a cheap date.

It usually worked a treat though.

M&S isn't my idea of posh either.

But it's as posh as the Bolton peasantry gets.

Primrose Hill sounds particularly horrendous in this weather though, no doubt it'll be full of delightfully middle-class couples marvelling at baby Quinoa trying some artisanal houmous

Edited March 29, 20215 yr by jmjhb

Weekend reporting, but that's a mega drop.

30 minutes ago, Youri McAnespie said:

M&S isn't my idea of posh either.

But it's as posh as the Bolton peasantry gets.

I got a hamper from Harvey Nichols a couple of years back when I had some cash.

we were going watching polo in Cheshire so wanted to properly look like cunts.

We did, because all the chinless lot were basically eating spam fritters out of Tupperware sat in the boots of their Subaru Forrester estates. Shit everywhere and drinking stubbies from Aldi.

There’s no need to try too hard.

Polo, by the way, is really really shit.

 

Just now, jmjhb said:

Primrose Hill sounds particularly horrendous in this weather though, no doubt it'll be full of delightfully middle-class couples marvelling at their baby Quinoa trying some artesenal houmous

Nah Primose Hill is ok, it's a decent mix being so close to Camden and Kentish Town - in fact it's just Regent's Park really. The area of Primrose Hill itself is very posh obviously but that's not the oiks sat in the park swigging from cans of larger, of which is warm weather there are an awful lot of.

And then you can , take a hop down the canal and have a drop with the punks on the lock.

4 minutes ago, Spider said:

I got a hamper from Harvey Nichols a couple of years back when I had some cash.

we were going watching polo in Cheshire so wanted to properly look like cunts.

We did, because all the chinless lot were basically eating spam fritters out of Tupperware sat in the boots of their Subaru Forrester estates. Shit everywhere and drinking stubbies from Aldi.

There’s no need to try too hard.

Aye. Proper posh people are real scruff bags.

 

3 minutes ago, Not in Crawley said:

Nah Primose Hill is ok, it's a decent mix being so close to Camden and Kentish Town - in fact it's just Regent's Park really. The area of Primrose Hill itself is very posh obviously but that's not the oiks sat in the park swigging from cans of larger, of which is warm weather there are an awful lot of.

And then you can , take a hop down the canal and have a drop with the punks on the lock.

Primrose Hill is a great place to spend a couple of hours on a nice day. Went up a couple of times whilst working in London to get away from the stickiness of all the people on the tube/streets.

 

1 hour ago, Youri McAnespie said:

How do you make a meal with that poncey crap?

Especially as the guestlist dietary requirements for NiC's soiree probably make yon man t'other week with his cultured veg and Orlando Bloom look like types who'd eat 10p Whoops! butties and a bag of Beef Space Raiders washed down with a can of Tango.

Besides, I reckon' Fortnum and Mason hampers are just trampy cunts idea of luxury.

Like plastinated yoof think Cristal and Chambord is classy and thick fuckers think Stephen Fry is dead clever.

You don't, its just snacks - bit of a treat for her 40th, having had them at work they are actaully really good, and as I say, the hampers themselves are decent. Bit annoyed about having to order a seafood platter to bring to whitstable as Wheelers Oyster Bar is shut.

 

Take a rod and line and try your luck?

 

Deaths up

Close the golf courses

Send the buggers back

In all seriousness, that's still an exceptionally low figure

Edited March 29, 20215 yr by jmjhb

You could smear some of the eighteen jars of jam on whatever you catch...

One hardly sees anyone fishing the sea here in the UK, even in cities on the sea on the continent you see folk fishing.

2 minutes ago, Youri McAnespie said:

Take a rod and line and try your luck?

 

I'd need Bolty on a fishing trip.

He'd hook a whopper or two.

 

2 minutes ago, Youri McAnespie said:

He'd hook a whopper or two.

 

Stood in on a boat in the Thames shouting ''get back from whence you came'' to bemused oyster catchers.

The birds or the fisherfolk?

https://britishseafishing.co.uk/south-east-england/

I like to think I'd catch and cook sommat, sad fact is even if I did I'd feel like a murderer.

I should be a vegetarian by rights...

Vegetarian food is laden with oestrogenic compounds though.

Got a piece of fillet steak at the weekend for the first time in ages.

Realised this afternoon I don't really want it.

I expect I'll be wearing a fedora and waxing lyrical on films about gay farmers soon enough.

22 minutes ago, Spider said:

Primrose Hill is a great place to spend a couple of hours on a nice day. Went up a couple of times whilst working in London to get away from the stickiness of all the people on the tube/streets.

 

Its so close to all that grimness it's just a nice place to spend an afternoon when its baking, plus a great walk across north London avoiding the tube.

17 minutes ago, Not in Crawley said:

Its so close to all that grimness it's just a nice place to spend an afternoon when its baking, plus a great walk across north London avoiding the tube.

I always like the smell of the tube, it reminded me of the unusual aroma you got down the pit.

3 minutes ago, leigh white said:

I always like the smell of the tube, it reminded me of the unusual aroma you got down the pit.

And I thought Whitt was a deviant.

3 minutes ago, leigh white said:

I always like the smell of the tube, it reminded me of the unusual aroma you got down the pit.

I have to say I agree, there is something about it, but I always try and walk if I can as places are never as far away as you think and nothing ever gets joined up properly if you just take the tube. Took me about five years to realise that!