Slow news day? The real deal? End of the world? 
 

They’re saying it probably came from an animal, has Somebody been shagging monkeys again? 

 

10 minutes ago, jmjhb said:

 

Good stuff, glad to se that we've moved fairly quickly on this

10 minutes ago, Tonge moor green jacket said:

Where the hell did you find that?

Quality.

Spike Milligan was before my time, but I remembered it from years ago, it was featured on one of those 'look at what was acceptable in the 70's' type countdown shows.

Most of the other non-PC stuff featured (that doesn't get repeated these days) was utterly unfunny anti-entertainment shite anyway (Love Thy Neighbour, It Ain't Half Hot Mum, Black and White Minstrels, The Comedians etc.) but that clip made me laugh out loud, which is a very rare occurrence.

 

Sir Kier Starmer's favourite sketch apparently.

John Craven's too.

😉

 

Edited January 14, 20215 yr by Youri McAnespie

They had originally asked for £360 a day to open the place for them.

Don’t know how much they are getting paid.

Good to see the town of horwich is finally starting to vac

10 minutes ago, Sweep said:

Good stuff, glad to se that we've moved fairly quickly on this

Maybe its a sign of how far expectations have fallen that you think its fairly quickly

Ill be honest, maybe theres one flight a week, i have no idea, but it shouldnt take 4 days imo

14 minutes ago, Casino said:

Maybe its a sign of how far expectations have fallen that you think its fairly quickly

Ill be honest, maybe theres one flight a week, i have no idea, but it shouldnt take 4 days imo

I know, it should have happened sooner - I'm just pleased they've made the decision without waiting for either Sturgeon to ban flights to Scotland first, or for Rashford to tweet about it.

In reality, you are correct, we've probably already had dozens of flights in from South America in the time it's taken to issue this ban, so the variant is probably already here anyway

My Dad got his appointment for tuesday in Smithills.

Anyway, back to the real matter in hand, come on then you mongrel loving hoards, whose taking on me, Miami and our Pride outside the club shop with your fleabitten packs of walking floor rugs?

Cat FACTS. BOOM!

A study by Carroll University in Wisconsin, USA, reports that cat owners tend to be more intelligent than dog owners – regardless of how intelligent their actual pet is.

600 students were surveyed to identify personality traits and whether they loved cats or dogs. The survey revealed that cat owners scored higher in terms of intelligence, and were found to be sensitive and open-minded people, while dog owners tend to be more energetic, outgoing and rule abiding people.

...well, they do spend time picking animal shit up off the floor, so.....

And there's more!

A study of 600 college students that was conducted Denise Guastello found that dog people maybe more social and outgoing and that cat people are far more sensitive and open-minded. It also noted cat owners were no more neurotic than dog owners. Cat people tend be non-conformist, somebody who stands up for what they believe in despite what anyone thinks which in many ways and perhaps mirrors the independence for which cats are renowned. Cat people also score higher on intelligence tests and more educated! Cat people are more likely to possess university degrees than dog owners. Educated people tend to work longer hours and opt for pets that compliment their personal circumstances and lifestyle."

Edited January 14, 20215 yr by Not in Crawley

Nothing. I repeat nothing stinks as bad as a cats breath. With the exception of cat shit. Which cat owners inexplicably encourage them to do inside the home and then leave it there, stinking the kitchen out.

You fucking dirty bastards! 😁

Edited January 14, 20215 yr by kent_white

3 minutes ago, kent_white said:

Nothing. I repeat nothing stinks as bad as a cats breath. With the exception of cat shit. Which cat owners inexplicably encourage them to do inside the home and then leave it there, stinking the kitchen out.

You fucking dirty bastards! 😁

Never owned a litter tray, fuck knows where the cat goes. Oh yeah. Next door's garden.

Can't say I've ever smelt a cat's breath. I have smelt dog shit though, and wet dog, and houses with dogs....

All reek to high heaven.

Horrible dog owning scumlords.

12 minutes ago, Not in Crawley said:

My Dad got his appointment for tuesday in Smithills.

 

Wheres it being done?

1 minute ago, Casino said:

Wheres it being done?

Crawleys’s garden

We had two or three shit machines that regularly dumped on our land

Rat poison put a stop to that

Exploded they did, the dirty little fuckers

Only slight downside was having to lob em over the fence to where they once lived

1 minute ago, Spider said:

Crawleys’s garden

I'm interested

I didnt think anybody was getting done in smithills

 

4 minutes ago, Not in Crawley said:

Never owned a litter tray, fuck knows where the cat goes. Oh yeah. Next door's garden.

That's fucking vile. I hope they've not got kids.

2 minutes ago, Casino said:

I'm interested

I didnt think anybody was getting done in smithills

 

It'll be Waters Meeting probably?

7 minutes ago, Casino said:

Wheres it being done?

Top of his arm  

Just now, kent_white said:

It'll be Waters Meeting probably?

Its just he said smithills

The fact i don't think it is smithills should perhaps demonstrate to mounts why its not as simple as flu or covid

2 minutes ago, Mr Grey said:

Cat Killer 

I hear, Tuna with a drop of anti-freeze does the trick.

I hear thats quick and painless, so ruled it out

2 minutes ago, kent_white said:

That's fucking vile. I hope they've not got kids.

New born, toughen the little one up I reckon. 

Cat's are way cleaner than dogs. Well, in my expereince their owners are as well.

1 minute ago, Ani said:

Top of his arm  

Are you here all week?

As much as I respect the University of some godforsaken, frozen backwater of northern USA, I prefer this piece of research by proper eggheads down at Cambridge uni:

”Cat owners are generally of average intelligence and as a result tend to be frustrated and failed academics who lean toward a need for verbatim regurgitation and a lifetime of being told what to think by scholars of measurably superior intellect.

This invariably leads to cat ownership. Believing them to be a superior species of domestic pet, they bafflingly view them as a kindred spirit.

Cats latch quickly onto this sense of subservience as it suits their narcissistic needs for food, shelter and a tray of cheap cereal to shit in.

They will sneer at dog owners, who always have respectful control of their pet, whilst their cat is probably next door slagging itself around for bacon scraps and milk.”

1 minute ago, Casino said:

Its just he said smithills

The fact i don't think it is smithills should perhaps demonstrate to mounts why its not as simple as flu or covid

I hadn't thought about that, are they doing these jabs in surgeries?