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Wanderers Ways. Neil Thompson 1961-2021

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Favourite Comedy Lines......

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"I'm playing all the right notes but not necessarily in the right order."

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    There are very fine lines in the ***pick the division Mr Coyle's team are losing in****

"I'm playing all the right notes but not necessarily in the right order."

We have a winner.

Ken, I grew up in Dublin. I love Dublin. If I grew up on a farm, and was retarded, Bruges might impress me but I didn't, so it doesn't.

To the regiment!....

 

I wish I was there!

Crime won't crack itself.

“I can speak for every guy in this room here tonight. Guys, if you could blow yourselves, ladies, you'd be in this room alone right now. Watching an empty stage.”

Crime won't crack itself.

If you were any squarer, you'd be an oxo cube Ken

"DAN! DAN! DAN! DAN! DAN! DAN! DAN! DAN! DAN! DAN! DAN! DAN! DAN! DAN!"

I'd offer you a can but I've only got 6

A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.


Steve Martin


Plugs. What kind of plugs?

 

A rubber one, bathroom.

 

What size?

 

Thirteen amp.

I was never a big fan, but that's the funniest comedy sketch I've ever seen, we are talking uncontrollable laughter.

http://youtu.be/oaGpaj2nHIo

"Look at you stuffing your face, sweets sweets sweets, your like a dustbin. No I dont want a fucking sweet, go on, get out mi car yer fat bitch, go on, fuck off"

Haha the krays BB??

"People used to call me a racist. How could I be a racist? My uncle died at Auschwitz"

 

"He fell out of a machine gun tower"

 

 

Bernard Manning.

"It's not how it looks? It's a 20 foot cock and balls, man. It don't look like nothing else." Phoenix Nights.

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'Where do these stairs go?'

 

'They go up'.

 

Ghostbusters

Treat your Camel like your woman, get into her 5 times a day and take her to heaven and back.

 

Lord Flasheart

'I wanna moonwalk son but life's a shihouse'

"Do you find it risible, when I say the name...Biggus Dickus?"

How far away are they?

You've got shit on yer shoes and I'm the shoe shine boy, ya shitty shoed bastard.

'Fuck mini Babybels'

 

Don't tell him, Pike

OK, Johan, you play centre midfield today.

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