gonzo Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 (edited) i feel like ive got a whole romanian orphanage inside my fucking house. whoever devised the method of 'i know the best way to get your baby to sleep,put it in its cot and let the fucker scream its head out at decibel levels ac-fucking-dc would be proud of until it goes to sleep,which could be anytime between now and 2036!'...... wants to come and sit with me right now. that is all. Edited January 24, 2012 by gonzo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TroySwoosh Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 got one of them baby things due in 2 weeks, will not be doing that then Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Site Supporter fatolive Posted January 24, 2012 Site Supporter Share Posted January 24, 2012 i feel like ive got a whole romanian orphanage inside my fucking house. whoever devised the method of 'i know the best way to get your baby to sleep,put it in its cot and let the fucker scream its head out at decibel levels ac-fucking-dc would be proud of until it goes to sleep,which could be anytime between now and 2036!'...... wants to come and sit with me right now. that is all. with you there mate,and share your pain, I fucked that method off after about 20 minutes,way I see it,any method that doesn't work after that length of time is shit anyway. pissed the wife off, but it's all right thinking these super nanny types on TV and writing shit in magazines know everything , but they don't have to listen to it all night with no sleep then get up at 6 and do a days work. I'm more favourable of he " you get up and give him what he wants to get him to shut the fuck up love" method myself, and I find that helps me sleep a lot better Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mona Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 (edited) Put the Hoover on 1 consistent noise lulls them to sleep 2 you can't hear them Ps... Only for 5 mins mind you NB and I hate this bloody iPad, it's got mind of it's own Edited January 24, 2012 by Mona Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gonzo Posted January 24, 2012 Author Share Posted January 24, 2012 i like your method! its not the noise that bothers you most,its the fact your lad or girl is in complete distress screaming its head off,but you have to sit there and try ignore it! total stress. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
no balls Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 Neighbours used to put theirs in the car seat and drive round, always sent them to sleep. disclaimer: I know fuck all about this sort of thing by the way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mona Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 (edited) Aye , did that an all, cost you a bloody fortune in petrol, and it don't help when you've had one over the eight! Edited January 24, 2012 by Mona Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gonzo Posted January 24, 2012 Author Share Posted January 24, 2012 whats up with a couple of tremadol and lastys on my tin of carlin? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
no balls Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 whats up with a couple of tremadol and lastys on my tin of carlin? It's a baby for crying out loud! A librium and a swill of brandy will suffice. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mona Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 Bloody hel NB , did you live next door to me as a kid The old biddy next door used to bang on the paper thin walls, and yell " stick a crust in 'is gob dipped in brandy " Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Site Supporter Winchester White Posted January 24, 2012 Site Supporter Share Posted January 24, 2012 Funnily enough, our 11 month old has just this minute finally stopped crying and has (touch wood) fallen asleep. Its unusual for him as he is usually a good sleeper but he is overtired (yes its a stupid fucking phrase but it does apply to kids unfortunately). We have always gone for the middle ground when it comes to sleep - don't go to him at every whimper or rock him to sleep but also don't leave him to bawl for hours on end. Seems to work for us, well, usually... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gonzo Posted January 24, 2012 Author Share Posted January 24, 2012 It's a baby for crying out loud! A librium and a swill of brandy will suffice. ....all is quiet on the western front at the moment by the way! in the old days,id reach for channel 906 with one ear on the creeking floor boards(damn you boiler!,,you have denied me many-o-wank!) now im scared to press the space bar incase it wakes the lad! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Site Supporter fatolive Posted January 24, 2012 Site Supporter Share Posted January 24, 2012 Neighbours used to put theirs in the car seat and drive round, always sent them to sleep. disclaimer: I know fuck all about this sort of thing by the way. aye that works a treat, but, these folk who know best say to do it as Gonzo describes, they reckon it's best in the long run,but as Gonzo points out,not only noisy as fuck, but it's also hard to ignore your child when somethings obviously up with him/her, and for that reason iamout as the natives on here say, and always have been with mine. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gonzo Posted January 24, 2012 Author Share Posted January 24, 2012 Funnily enough, our 11 month old has just this minute finally stopped crying and has (touch wood) fallen asleep. Its unusual for him as he is usually a good sleeper but he is overtired (yes its a stupid fucking phrase but it does apply to kids unfortunately). We have always gone for the middle ground when it comes to sleep - don't go to him at every whimper or rock him to sleep but also don't leave him to bawl for hours on end. Seems to work for us, well, usually... spot on....always boggles me why if your baby misses its morning or afto nap,its then a nightmare getting em to sleep at night? mines 1 year old the day we play arsenal...... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Traf Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 ....im scared to press the space bar incase it wakes the lad! thenjusttypeeverypostyoumakeasonebiglongworditwillstillmakemoresensethananythingwrittenbylittlewhitt Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
no balls Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 I've just checked what is on channel 906 & was surprised how tame the said channel is..... for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mona Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 So funny, and so many worrying fathers How times change ... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gonzo Posted January 24, 2012 Author Share Posted January 24, 2012 906 is very tame nb! ....gets better later on though.bird normally rolls around with a tea towel or summet. and traf....can you answer me this?.... why is the space bar so fucking big? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
no balls Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 906 is very tame nb! ....gets better later on though.bird normally rolls around with a tea towel or summet. Who texts in to get them to pretend to wash up?? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jazza Posted January 25, 2012 Share Posted January 25, 2012 weren't crying babies what garden sheds were invented for? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zulu Posted January 25, 2012 Share Posted January 25, 2012 Takes me back. I remember when my lad was about six months old - twelve years ago. We were staying in a hotel at Stansted prior to getting a holiday flight at half past daft. Usual thing, one in the morning and the boy screaming his head off. Muggins here delegated to walk him round in his buggy until he dropped off to sleep. Half way around the car park and taxi draws up bringing bride and groom (bride in full white kit) back to hotel from their wedding reception. Cue my advice to groom "Enjoy tonight pal, cos this is the future!" Groom smiled then looked slightly worried. Bride frowned and security mon on hotel door very nearly pissed himself. Happy days. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andydee Posted January 25, 2012 Share Posted January 25, 2012 Standing joke that I used to give our's Fennigans (sic) to get them off to sleep. (Disclaimer: I am not medically qualified and do not advocate giving prescription drugs to children - but I was fuckin knackered!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Site Supporter barryk32 Posted January 25, 2012 Site Supporter Share Posted January 25, 2012 We took our youngest camping when he was about 5/6 weeks old. After that the little sod would only go to sleep outside for about a fucking fortnight!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Site Supporter Tonge moor green jacket Posted January 25, 2012 Site Supporter Share Posted January 25, 2012 ....all is quiet on the western front at the moment by the way! in the old days,id reach for channel 906 with one ear on the creeking floor boards(damn you boiler!,,you have denied me many-o-wank!) now im scared to press the space bar incase it wakes the lad! Memories- would refrain from even going for a piss, for fear of the creeking floor boards waking ours up! Thank fook he was born in Oct.- the nights were dark early, so could creep down the garden for slash in the shrubs! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wiggy Posted January 25, 2012 Share Posted January 25, 2012 I can heartily recommend a rocking chair. Didn't have one for our first baby but got one just before our second was born last September. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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