Allen Carr (not the goofy “comedian”) writes books about how to stop drinking and/or smoking.

My sister read it a few years back and, whilst she want a full on alky, was overdoing the booze.

After reading this book, she hasn’t touched a drop since. Not one.

So, as a challenge, I said I’d read the book and prove that this kind of thing doesn’t really work and that she was just ready to stop anyway.

about 2 weeks ago, I reached just over the halfway point. Since then, I’ve probably had 2 pints and one glass of wine, none of which I particularly enjoyed.

I’m annoyed for several reasons:

* I adore a drink, and I feel the pleasure has been stolen from me

* My sister was right and I was wrong about the book

* I feel somehow invaded by this author who I never invited into my life in the first place.

* I want a beer, but don’t want a beer. It’s fucking WEIRD.

 

I need help in getting back on the horse.

Im not going to preach, but if you really want to kick the booze (he does fags as well), then I’m here to tell you, brothers and sisters, that this fucker works.

 

4 minutes ago, Francis Fogarty said:

I had a spell a few years ago of going in 'Spoons 10:00am.

The same blokes, drinking John Smiths for hours. There was a tenner that seemed to go from one to the other as a transferable loan. 'Have you got a tenner until Bill comes in? He's just in the Balmoral.'

'Yes, but I'll need it back because I owe it Tom. He'll be in later '

And so on.

Fortunately I got out of the habit before I got in too deep.

Last time I was in spoons in Bolton the ceiling caved in near the door at water came smashing down all over the tables below. The nearby piss pots didn't bat an eyelid and just cracked on

I always wonder what happens after 3pm with daytime pisspots. Do you just go home and carry on? 

12 minutes ago, gonzo said:

Last time I was in spoons in Bolton the ceiling caved in near the door at water came smashing down all over the tables below. The nearby piss pots didn't bat an eyelid and just cracked on

I always wonder what happens after 3pm with daytime pisspots. Do you just go home and carry on? 

Spoons, is like a social club these days. A student type came in a few weeks ago, perched on the same table as me and Mrs.F and plugged his phone and laptop in and started charging them up. Then he disappears for ten mins with a cheery 'watch my stuff mate'.

 He eventually comes back with a never ending coffee.

Apart from taking a picture of my knob on his phone, and ringing our Loft in Israel, no harm done.

22 hours ago, Francis Fogarty said:

Apart from taking a picture of my knob on his phone, and ringing our Loft in Israel, no harm done.

Haha. Brilliant!!

On 07/01/2023 at 12:16, gonzo said:

Last time I was in spoons in Bolton the ceiling caved in near the door at water came smashing down all over the tables below. The nearby piss pots didn't bat an eyelid and just cracked on

I always wonder what happens after 3pm with daytime pisspots. Do you just go home and carry on? 

I refer you to the honourable @leigh white

I went into Spoons in Burnley at 9am today for breakfast, it was heaving.

49 minutes ago, Traf said:

I went into Spoons in Burnley at 9am today for breakfast, it was heaving.

They can’t tell the time up there anyway so I doubt they even realise how early it is

8 pints friday in town and 3 cans of rivi, average 5.5 last night

Thats reasonable in my book

On 06/01/2023 at 22:26, gonzo said:

Maybe not as extreme as John but every pub has em. Blokes that sit there all day every day.

£30-40 a day alone just on pints. Chuck a 20 deck in there and your kicking on £300 a week just on sitting in the boozer all day.

Madness.

Was thinking about pubs and regulars the other day. 

I'm under the impression the likes of John's are dying out. Once this generation of John's passes, more and more pubs will be shut 

New generation don't bother going out unless there's something going on in the pub 

Current crop of regular drinkers go out for a chat and some company as they don't know how to sit on social media all day talking bollocks 

 

21 minutes ago, Casino said:

8 pints friday in town and 3 cans of rivi, average 5.5 last night

Thats reasonable in my book

They've some new 9% jobby due out Rivi tap

On 06/01/2023 at 22:26, gonzo said:

Maybe not as extreme as John but every pub has em. Blokes that sit there all day every day.

£30-40 a day alone just on pints. Chuck a 20 deck in there and your kicking on £300 a week just on sitting in the boozer all day.

Madness.

Surname begins with H by any chance 😂😎

5 hours ago, Ani said:

Surname begins with H by any chance 😂😎

My fave story of his is him getting to the york on xmas day at 9am. Landlord had a lock-in night before and wasnt up yet. He let H in and went back to bed and said help yourself and dont put the lights on.

Said it was a perfect Christmas morning. 9am stood in a pub in total darkness pouring his own pints. Family turned up at dinner with his pressies

 

Discovered that Poretti is like loopy juice for me. Was working Saturday, bit of a shit day so met my Dad and football lads at cricket club after match. Fuck me I only had 5, I was a pain in the arse. Fella thinks I'm a bloody lightweight now. 

Just now, bolton_blondie said:

I was a pain in the arse.

I heard that's nothing to do with ale.

2 minutes ago, Traf said:

I heard that's nothing to do with ale.

Sorry. Even more of a pain in the arse than usual  😁

Just now, bolton_blondie said:

Sorry. Even more of a pain in the arse than usual  😁

I'll give you that one.

Nice night on Friday and then nothing else all weekend, couple of trips to the gym (just me and Millwall Bandana Man at 6.30 this morning, although last night an Ipswich fan came in - how on earth can you wear a top with Ed Sheeran albums on it? Terrible) 

Got a voucher for Picturehouse for xmas so that should be good to keep us out of the pub for a few weeks. Going watching this tonight if work doesn't overtake me https://www.searchlightpictures.com/empire-of-light/ Set in Margate so it'll be interesting to watch given its changed so much and when it's set, and its got Toby Jones in it, who I love watching.

got the first weekend out the way, that's the hardest one

nearly a 3rd of the way through now

by Sunday it'll be half way

back in the gym properly today

all going in the right direction

I think I'll try and do the whole month now just to see how much, if any, weight I lsoe by not drinking

5 minutes ago, Zico said:

got the first weekend out the way, that's the hardest one

nearly a 3rd of the way through now

by Sunday it'll be half way

back in the gym properly today

all going in the right direction

I think I'll try and do the whole month now just to see how much, if any, weight I lsoe by not drinking

You’ll be saving a £fortune n all!

Spoons near me has the same folk day in day out. They got all excited with the World Cup banners and advertising the games would be on. No matter what time you walked past, or who was playing, it would always be horse racing on every telly.

 Glasgow has a different breed of drinkers. No idea how they do it. It’s the cigs as well, they make folk look permanently ill. 

Reality is that’s all they’ve ever known and it’s where their pals are. Most choose the pub over the loneliness.

36 minutes ago, Zico said:

got the first weekend out the way, that's the hardest one

nearly a 3rd of the way through now

by Sunday it'll be half way

back in the gym properly today

all going in the right direction

I think I'll try and do the whole month now just to see how much, if any, weight I lsoe by not drinking

Just one pint for me at the weekend and plenty morning light and walking.

Do feel good today for it.

Gym later for me as well.

Hope it continues to be a good month for you👍

went out for a quite pint yesterday about 4 

on way home bumped in to Big City Girl so had a few with her 

 Then ended up with a Random bird  Back at mine 

Edited January 9, 20233 yr by little whitt

2 minutes ago, little whitt said:

went out for a quite pint yesterday about 4 

on way home bumped in to Big City Girl so had a few with her 

ended up with her Mate Back at mine 

carry on

51 minutes ago, L/H White said:

carry on

He wiped her arse with a lemon floor wipe

1 hour ago, little whitt said:

went out for a quite pint yesterday about 4 

on way home bumped in to Big City Girl so had a few with her 

ended up with her Mate Back at mine 

Did you RUIN her?

1 hour ago, little whitt said:

went out for a quite pint yesterday about 4 

on way home bumped in to Big City Girl so had a few with her 

ended up with her Mate Back at mine 

are you taller than @no balls?