cureforsanity

As I towd our lad toneet when he asked what was for tea, "a run round t' table & a bite o' t' latch"

Waiting for your daily check in to start sounding worryingly eastern european in flavour.....

Same here, sewer collapse at bag lane/mealhouse lane sounds like it's taken the cable with it too......

Dinenage or out o' t' scooby doo band. Possibly Durst.

Honey indeed instead of sugar in your java, it's the future and Pabbers speaks the truth!

Spoken to Mary, no visit from the coppers though there is a letter issued by gmp wankers every year regarding St George's flags. Anyway, the flags will be out and ale shall be supped. She did say however that if the dibble received a complaint about the flags then she eould be asked to take them down There will be no complaints.

Salford for me too. Used to be wiggin but started to get a bit fed up when they had no competition, win after win so I went to the other extreme. What the ex leyther said though. I used to play union and reckon I could do now if I wasn't such a lazy twat. No comparison though, league is far superior. Just need a fresh team for my lad as his has folded. He plays at full back and he's like greased lightning. Getting tubby as he's not played for weeks

Whoa! You've not just moved the goalposts but taken them down and constructed bigger, wider, fancier ones on another pitch! It's still easy to answer though, you'd give them the treatment - who's to say they won't pay it back handsomely in taxes in the future or benefit the country in some great way? That of course doesn't mean to say they won't end up on jeremy kyle with holes in their arms but there you go. Until the future can be accurately predicted then we can't afford not to take the risk. Maybe the drug and NHS money could be better spent on crystal ball development?

If it was me and I (miraculously) lived to 99 I'd refuse it. I've had a good innings, let someone else benefit, always folks worse off than you. If, however, I was so much of a dribbling vegetable that I didn't know what was going on, then why bother? Just wheel me up a mountain and let me get on with it.

I think it will need more than pies and an authority to educate wiggin. I had a text off bedford high yesterday telling me not to park in the staff car park when dropping children off at school. Not that I do, but at least I THINK that's what it said, the level of spelling used is easily exceeded by my 6 year old. Why send a message from a school if you can't spell? Fuckwits.

As far as I know, Ian's a serial shagger. Mate of mine's adopted brother and straight as a die. I sold him a satnav years ago which he used mainly to shag his way around fellow female performers. The last time I heard from him he was arranging a shagathon with an unnamed star waiting for her husband to fuck off for the weekend.

Metallica? Four horsemen I think

If it's that shitbox Fuckup, sorry - Focus you've been abusing for years than I'm surprised if it's worth more than two bob Tom, especially with all the ale stains in the back and spunk stains in the front..... HTH like..... ;P

My world is a football.....

Our kid used to be a washer upper on Saturdays in there. Did it turn into the Pickwick or summat? Or was that a part of it or somewhere else?

Lamberhead Green

Aye but not telling where. Did that once, never again. If I go there now it's full of my mates' motors!

"is it just me?" "not being funny but....." Any saying that contains impossible percentages such as "I'm with you 200%" or "the lads gave it 110%". No. They didn't.

I'm a fecking girl's blouse so there's no way I'm having that done. I had a quiet word with the consultant in charge of Mrs Cure's c section and I'm having her 'spaded' (in the words of one of my blue collar neighbours about his dug). I tried my luck to see if he could chuck in a tummy tuck whilst he was rummaging around in there too but he said there was no way. She can have an excercise bike for her birthday instead. I'm all fucking heart me.

Went from one extreme to t' other today in the Scutterville (Leyth) branch of Asda. Posh (?!) bloke chastising Elouise (so I had Dave Vanian in my head for a while afterwards) until I heard destiny calling. Or rather her fat sweaty mother, replete in finest fake uggs, Dagenham facelift and a whiff of burberry and crime. "Destiny!!!!? DESTINY!!!!!" Ffs, personally I thought "Density" would've been more appropriate.... Now, daft as I am for unusual non chavtastic monikers we'll need one for late Feb when sprog #5 arrives (girl this time I've been tpld). The welshist Mrs Cure has told me no hippy names so Star and Vega (among others) are out. Maybe we should call her "Last" or "Enough"?

I've not had a sup of my ale in the last 10 minutes for fear of me spitting it on the screen. Daftest thread on here for ages, I've not stopped giggling for ages and all for the sake of a Crimbo avatar. Christ himself knows what happens when asked about any serious subject. But keep it up chaps. I think the scariest thing was Smiffs one which I could actually believe is reality. Oh, mine? I seemed to have been relegated to my pissed Santa most of the year so I thought I'd be a 'ninjervijewel'. Still, it may be quite appropriate if Friday is final day. Maybe Bolty could give us 12 hours notice if it kicks off there first, at least we could get a few beers and mucky wimmin in.........

I think the gouranga's summat to dp wi t' hare krishnas. There was another piece of literal genius can't remember where reading "I really really love you Kim" I think on a bridge in Ingley? Question is, did Kim reciprocate?

Aye, that guoranga stuff is still on bridges on the M62 towards murkyside even now. Coming off there going to switch island there's a local landmark bridge which has 'The pies! The pies!' painted on it. Years ago folks used to navigate through here 'when you see the bridge saying 'the pies' turn left/right so it became a bit of a leg end. That stretch got relaid a few years ago and the bridge repainted. It STILL says the pies on it, whether they painted around it or some local wag repainted the original nobody can be sure. It's puzzled me for years what the feck it means though.......

I didn't like to say as it's not likely this year due to budgetary (if that's a real word) restraints (I know restraints is) but one of these: my fave is in a rather restrained gentlemanly dark blue like this, not for me these acid deluded hues of red and yellow....... Sorry about the huge image, but it really DOES have to be an alloy one, preferably a 1967 like me....