Be a painter and decorator. It’s shit. Proper shit. Stairs and landing next. I’m even thinking of getting little Whitt in and leaving my wash basket open. Glossing can kiss my fucking arse. 

I really couldn't be a Slaughterman.

I used to hate decorating, but I don't mind it now. Took me years to realise I could/should take as long as possible and do a proper decent job - with the added bonus of hours and hours of nobody mithering me because "I'm busy". Couldn't do it professionally though, unless I charged a grand per wall.

One job I definitely couldn't do is nursing. Can't even pick up a dog turd in a dog turd bag without gagging.

If I needed to I could do any job at all ... but, as mentioned above, I couldn't do one that kills animals.

Once knew a lad whose job was to murder male chicks.  Used to sort them, then fling the males to one side and then gas them like a Nazi. Something like that'd give me nightmares for life.

Work in a care home and do what the care staff do, they have my upmost respect. 

1 hour ago, Mounts Kipper said:

Work in a care home and do what the care staff do, they have my upmost* respect. 

*utmost

Edited September 17, 20232 yr by Cheese

8 hours ago, DazBob said:

If I needed to I could do any job at all ... but, as mentioned above, I couldn't do one that kills animals.

Once knew a lad whose job was to murder male chicks.  Used to sort them, then fling the males to one side and then gas them like a Nazi. Something like that'd give me nightmares for life.

There was a video on here years ago of a machine with interlocking toothed wheels in the bottom of a hopper. The male chicks were just put into the hopper and dragged in to be crushed. 
 

When we had a CO2 shortage a few years ago I hadn’t realised it was part of the killing process for pigs

9 hours ago, bolton_blondie said:

Be a painter and decorator. It’s shit. Proper shit. Stairs and landing next. I’m even thinking of getting little Whitt in and leaving my wash basket open. Glossing can kiss my fucking arse. 

IM IN

Not sure I could work in an office.

Probably best kept away from women in nylon as well.

 

 

Sales 

Especially Tele sales 

Fuck that

Could never work behind a bar either, well a busy one anyway 

Anything customer facing 

Just let me get on with things locked away in a dark room with minimal human contact

Greggs at a service station. They work bloody hard, serving all kinds of numpties probably for a pittance. 

I'd do that before I ever became a prison officer though.

2 hours ago, Duck Egg said:

Greggs at a service station. They work bloody hard, serving all kinds of numpties probably for a pittance. 

I'd do that before I ever became a prison officer though.

Him off Bad Girls had it good. Fenners wasnt it?

4 minutes ago, gonzo said:

Him off Bad Girls had it good. Fenners wasnt it?

I don’t like any jobs

Just now, tomski said:

I don’t like any jobs

hand jobs?

Just now, Sweep said:

hand jobs?

Nah As I assume I’d be giving them.

Going round knocking on doors either getting someone to change their utilities supplier of sign for a charity that saves cats in Romania and being to told to piss off multiple times a day.

Dentist Or High school teacher

 

5 hours ago, gonzo said:

Not sure I could work in an office.

Probably best kept away from women in nylon as well.

 

 

I did best part of 40 years in offices in the paper trade and can confirm the nylon distraction, then got a job support worker in a day centre. I've not worked a day for 14 years. Still doing two days now.

Slaughterhouse was also mentioned. I saw a little video the other week for some vegan outfit. The commentary upset me for days.

6 hours ago, royal white said:

Dentist 

 

Given the wedge my dentist charged me today I'd be happy to do that if I had the ability.

Charity mugger

Gynaecologist in Pakistan. 

Cleaner at the video cabins in Amsterdam 

Rent Boy, according to @Big Ethe hours are terrible and some of the bummings are brutal

just dropped my car off for a service & mot, which made me realise I could never be a mechanic 

covered in shit and oil all day, no thanks

41 minutes ago, Sweep said:

Rent Boy, according to @Big Ethe hours are terrible and some of the bummings are brutal

Yeah, but what bits of the job doesn't he like?