Site Supporter MickyD Posted September 22, 2021 Site Supporter Share Posted September 22, 2021 On 21/09/2021 at 13:13, Youri McAnespie said: When you wake up with heartburn at 4am and instead of thinking "Maybe gorgonzola on toast at 1am wasn't the best idea..." You instead think... "I've been so sedentary, a clots's probably formed, broke free and I'm minutes from a Pulmonary Embolism..." Then gone and swigged heavily from a bottle of Amaretto as an emergency blood thinner... My sudden wake ups with heartburn usually coincide with me thinking I’m being put to death in some Caligula-style amphitheatre and the method of death involves molten metal being poured into my mouth. I really don’t know how the hell I survive a night’s sleep. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Youri McAnespie Posted September 22, 2021 Share Posted September 22, 2021 (edited) 22 minutes ago, MickyD said: My sudden wake ups with heartburn usually coincide with me thinking I’m being put to death in some Caligula-style amphitheatre and the method of death involves molten metal being poured into my mouth. I really don’t know how the hell I survive a night’s sleep. I rarely get it. But I suppose that's why I mention it in the 'getting owd #365' thread. Costochondritis is still No.1 for "I'm having a cardiac arrest - ring th'Ambulance" Edited September 22, 2021 by Youri McAnespie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mona Posted September 22, 2021 Share Posted September 22, 2021 On 21/09/2021 at 09:09, bolton_blondie said: Orange juice in coffee I've done a few times White wine instead of milk is my failure on the other hand , maybe not Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Site Supporter FrancisFogarty Posted September 23, 2021 Site Supporter Share Posted September 23, 2021 On 22/09/2021 at 08:59, Rudy said: my morning piss is getting earlier and earlier 6:45 this morning Ill be in the 4am club and needing to do a second wipe soon enough I have a shit 7:30 every morning without fail. Problem is I don't get up until 8:00 Talking about age ,that's an old one too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stevieb Posted September 23, 2021 Share Posted September 23, 2021 On 22/09/2021 at 08:57, Youri McAnespie said: Either shave them twice weekly or not at all. Solid advice. On 22/09/2021 at 14:05, Rudy said: Blondie is 46. Little lever for you Was it @Pablo who was a grandad at 29? Fucking skillz.. I'd only just got my number one son at 28. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Rudy Posted September 23, 2021 Members Share Posted September 23, 2021 10 minutes ago, stevieb said: Solid advice. Was it @Pablo who was a grandad at 29? Fucking skillz.. I'd only just got my number one son at 28. Scousers for you Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
little whitt Posted September 23, 2021 Share Posted September 23, 2021 WHEN YOU PISS 2/3 TIMES A NIGHT Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Youri McAnespie Posted September 23, 2021 Share Posted September 23, 2021 If someone was to become grandparent at 29, even two minutes to midnight before their 30th birthday, including gestation periods, it would take two successive generations to become pregnant or impregnate at 14 1/4 years of age... Or sommat. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Site Supporter Winchester White Posted September 23, 2021 Site Supporter Share Posted September 23, 2021 48 minutes ago, stevieb said: Solid advice. Was it @Pablo who was a grandad at 29? Fucking skillz.. I'd only just got my number one son at 28. What? Not having that, surely not? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Site Supporter FrancisFogarty Posted September 24, 2021 Site Supporter Share Posted September 24, 2021 13 hours ago, little whitt said: WHEN YOU PISS 2/3 TIMES A NIGHT And not one during the day when you've had some pints, tea coffee etc. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pablo Posted October 1, 2021 Share Posted October 1, 2021 On 23/09/2021 at 21:55, stevieb said: Solid advice. Was it @Pablo who was a grandad at 29? Fucking skillz.. I'd only just got my number one son at 28. Woooow. It was Baz Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Site Supporter FrancisFogarty Posted October 1, 2021 Site Supporter Share Posted October 1, 2021 When, three pages in you've just noticed that the thread title says 'your' which should be 'you're' and you can be bothered bringing it up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members bolton_blondie Posted October 1, 2021 Author Members Share Posted October 1, 2021 10 minutes ago, Francis Fogarty said: When, three pages in you've just noticed that the thread title says 'your' which should be 'you're' and you can be bothered bringing it up. I have a terrible habit of doing that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Site Supporter FrancisFogarty Posted October 1, 2021 Site Supporter Share Posted October 1, 2021 14 minutes ago, bolton_blondie said: I have a terrible habit of doing that. But now I feel bad about bringing it up. Mind you I'm getting old. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fatty Posted October 1, 2021 Share Posted October 1, 2021 Going for a piss and finish. Put the old chap away and realise there’s that tiny bit left. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fatty Posted October 1, 2021 Share Posted October 1, 2021 14 minutes ago, fatty said: Going for a piss and finish. Put the old chap away and realise there’s that tiny bit left. Normally when wearing beige trousers. Deliberately getting them wet when washing hands to mask it ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Youri McAnespie Posted October 1, 2021 Share Posted October 1, 2021 (edited) Take an odd sock and do a 'Red Hot Chilli Pepper' then put the old man away. Remove after a while. The same sock can then act as a hanky (use the non-pissy 'ankle' section). Wetting trousers elsewhere just looks like you can't piss straight AND that you suffer 'dewdrops'... Edited October 1, 2021 by Youri McAnespie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Rudy Posted October 1, 2021 Members Share Posted October 1, 2021 3 hours ago, fatty said: Going for a piss and finish. Put the old chap away and realise there’s that tiny bit left. You took your dad? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Site Supporter RONNIE PHILLIPS Posted October 1, 2021 Site Supporter Share Posted October 1, 2021 6 hours ago, Rudy said: You took your dad? No, it was just the pensioner at the next urinal 😁 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Site Supporter MickyD Posted October 2, 2021 Site Supporter Share Posted October 2, 2021 17 hours ago, Francis Fogarty said: When, three pages in you've just noticed that the thread title says 'your' which should be 'you're' and you can be bothered bringing it up. 16 hours ago, bolton_blondie said: I have a terrible habit of doing that. I used to get pissed off about it too but this site, if nothing else, has taught me that it really doesn’t matter on a football forum. If it was a job application, fine, bin the fucker. But swapping of for have… that really gets my goat. (Could of, should of, etc.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Site Supporter FrancisFogarty Posted October 2, 2021 Site Supporter Share Posted October 2, 2021 14 hours ago, MickyD said: I used to get pissed off about it too but this site, if nothing else, has taught me that it really doesn’t matter on a football forum. If it was a job application, fine, bin the fucker. But swapping of for have… that really gets my goat. (Could of, should of, etc.) And that Micky sums up WWays. It's an opinion and means fuck all. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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