Stuff You Can't Do......that You Should Be Able To

[Sweep]

1) "Cutting In" when decorating, I'm fucking rubbish at it, I shake like a shitting dog and can't paint in a straight line - I can also add glossing to that as well, I'm shit at that as well.

 

2) Hang pictures up properly, all the walls in my house are solid brick and plaster, so I always have to get the drill out and end up making a right fucking mess. I'm going to have to to sticking pictures to the walls using "no more nails" I think

 

 

CWP = DIY Spaz

 

 

 

Any other things that folk on here struggle with?

 

A bloke here in the office has just admited to not being able to make an omlette?!?! -

[Judge Fudge]

Sorting my daughters hair out.

 

Missus, sister in law, mam etc quick brush, twist and a turn and she looks like a little princess.

 

I can spend half an hour and there's bits sticking out here there and everywhere and within 10 mins she favours bastard scarecrow.

[Maggie Tate]

Almost everything. My lack of ability where practical things are concerned is shameful and made a lot worse by my missus being brilliant at all of it.

[DazBob]

I can't do owt that involves the slightest bit of DIY skills.

 

When I was in my marital home I sanded down and painted the front door. A five year old could've done a better job.

[Sweep]

I can't do owt that involves the slightest bit of DIY skills.

 

It must be a genetic thing

[Danny G]

I could never skin up, i dont smoke that crap anymore so not too fussed

[Breightmet Boy]

Algebra, I just can't do it. I did a Automobile Engineering course at Horwich College and I'd of lost points on my exams.

[Carlos]

I decorated my last house and it took me fucking ages. When I'd finished, I couldn't relax for looking for imperfections so moved.

[Traf]

DIY = Don't Involve Yourself

[jazza]

Stay sober

[Smiffs]

Shoot my load when I'm wankered

[Eavesy]

Shoot my load when I'm wankered

 

We have a winner.

 

You do well to get near that stage....

[Guest]

I should know how to change a tyre

[Casino]

loads of stuff i can't do

 

so, i got married

[Guest]

loads of stuff i can't do

 

so, i got married

 

 

wonderful creatures

[jules_darby]

Self fellatio

[Burndens Bogs]

Get a blow job off the Mrs any time you fancy.

[Smiffs]

See I'm not sure I would do that.

 

Whilst understanding yhe benefits, the thought of my nob in my mouth makes me feels bit sick.

[jules_darby]

See I'm not sure I would do that.

 

Whilst understanding yhe benefits, the thought of my nob in my mouth makes me feels bit sick.

Just your nob?

 

[Guest]

See I'm not sure I would do that.

 

Whilst understanding yhe benefits, the thought of my nob in my mouth makes me feels bit sick.

 

dogs quite enjoy slavvering over themselves

[Leyther_Matt]

I should know how to change a tyre

I got one yesterday. Apparently my breakdown cover doesn't allow for flat tyres (serves me right for taking it as a freebie with my insurance) so £78 lighter for getting someone to come out to it. Granted I didn't have any of the tools anyroad apart from a spare tyre, but the whole job took him 8 minutes from start to finish including paperwork!

 

I can't cut/saw owt in a straight line either, but I blame that on being left handed.

[no balls]

Scratch my own back. I hate being a flid

[Traf]

 

I can't cut/saw owt in a straight line either, but I blame that on being left handed.

 

Me too.

Can't use scissors, my gran says I'm cack handed.

[DazBob]

Get a blow job off the Mrs any time you fancy.

 

Very generous of you (and her).

 

How much notice do I need to give?

[tarian1979]

Im fucking terrible at DIY. I dont bother hardly if truth be known i know im that bad.

Missus put our flatpack furniture together when we bought our house in 2007. We got people in to paint every room before we moved in. Her dad hung mirrors. He comes round now still now and again and fixes things.

This year is first time ive attempted to do anything really - paint the back garden fence - id left it unpainted for 6 years and had enough of "we need to paint the back garden panels it looks awful" lines.

Downstairs loo has been bust for 3 years - well when you flush it water keeps coming out for minutes and minutes. Probably a two minute job fix it (her dad couldnt get the top thing off to do it when he tried) - cant be fked doing it myself. She'll wait forever if she waits for me to ring a plumber as well.

Also remember at school being forced to do woodwork as a GCSE, hated it, my coursework was 4 pieces of sanded down wood not even put together (cant remember what i was trying to do).