Worst Airport

[Casino]

10 minutes ago, Winchester White said:

Fucking hell, that was a hell hole, even worse than Zante and that was crap. All this was 20 odd years ago so I would hope they have improved since.

About 5 years ago it was upgraded

Caused me to drop my guard and the bites were worse than ever

[buckhurstwhite]

London City Airport cramped and shite, but I could trump that with Mwanza

[MickyD]

Every time we go to Crete, we find out the time of our pickup and book a taxi half an hour earlier. It’s very much worth the €25 to avoid getting on a bus with a bunch of pissed up kids who over-did their week in Hersonnisos. 

[MancWanderer]

2 hours ago, Casino said:

I've never been to chania but it can't be as bad as heraklion, even after the upgrade

An absolute shocker

I've never once come out with fewer than half a dozen bites

No issues with Heraklion. Perfect airport. Get the British scutters out as quick as possible. Least possible tIme spent there. In. Out. Gone. Suits me. Chania? Retirement home for the Madrid police. British? You going to suffer my friend…. 

[Youri McAnespie]

The police at Vicente Calderon weren't Madrid Police.

Hence them happily wading into the Atletico lot with batons too.

They come in from surrounding areas for football matches - domestic and European.

[Exiled Girl]

15 hours ago, Escobarp said:

Think I flew from 4 once. It was as I imagine  downtown Kabul to be. The smell to this day remains in my nostrils 

4 was built in the 80s & is very much of the time. They shunt the odds & sods international airlines there now. 3 tends to be slightly better regarded international airlines, 5 is BA & 2 is Star Alliance. Originally BMI were going to be the main airline in T2, but they got bought out so now it's mostly Lufthansa and SAS

[Not in Crawley]

Can't be arsed looking through but Edinburgh is the pits. Miles away from the city, always loads of queues - don't think I've ever not been delayed on a flight back to London. Its so bad I usually get the train as it's always quicker by the time you've checked in etc

[Not in Crawley]

On 23/10/2021 at 21:04, Dr. Feelgood said:

I've been to a good few & worked at Heathrow, Manchester, Stansted & Gatwick.

The one I dread is arriving back at Liverpool. The Scousers simply LOVE fckg the passengers around and truly don't give a fck.

The Teesside one was a laugh. A bus station with a runway. A number of smaller Greek island ones are similar, but warmer and drier 

I would once have said Tel Aviv which, for years was basically an empty Kwik Save with interminal (see what I did there ?). I then didn't go for a few years & on my return it was a Goddamn palace. I also had VIP clearance and swept past those horrific queues. That didn't have give me a smug feeling.

Manchester Airport is a blooming strange place. Possibly the worst working experience of my lives. Utterly dominated by aggressively career-minded females who'd step on their own grannies to progress.

It's owned by the various councils of Greater Manchestet and decision making gets lost in that. But that's all behind the scenes. On the actual customer experience I saw it as quite competent but variable. The upgrade of T2 was enormous & too slow & disruptive to customers. tbh it gained from the Covid impact. It could be completed without all those pesky customers getting in the way. I've not been since then but there are far worse.

The biggest issues at Heathrow are its sheer scale and a bunch of game-playing Unions who block anything they fancy blocking. The current hours & hours of queues to re-enter is precisely that. The Border Force is an incompetent and infiltrated body who have absolutely no intention of operating smoothly.

I flew from Exeter to Manchester once. Now that was a bus station, plane had propellers and there was zero security.

I'm thinking not many international terrorists are going to target Exeter.

[Not in Crawley]

6 minutes ago, Mr Grey said:

JOHN LENNON INTERNATIONAL, just because its in fucking Merseyside, SCOUSE CUNTS!

Last time I flew from there they had the city of culture carpets down that were about 10 years old then.

Place seemed utterly uncared for.

Edited October 26, 2021 by Not in Crawley

[Escobarp]

Shetland. Everyone knows everyone security alarms going off and folk just nod and waltz through. If you wear a suit to travel onto the island they will at some point ask what you are there for. If you say business it spreads like wildfire that the tax man or similar is on the island. 
strange strange place 

[Gonk]

Prefer Liverpool to Manc.

Park for 10 days for 30 quid 2 minutes from the terminal.

Queues for security maximum 5 minutes.

 

[Winchester White]

1 minute ago, Gonk said:

Prefer Liverpool to Manc.

Park for 10 days for 30 quid 2 minutes from the terminal.

Queues for security maximum 5 minutes.

 

It is certainly a lot cheaper than Manchester.

Only flown from Liverpool twice, the first time was also my 1st experience of easyjet and when they gave me a laminated, reusable "boarding card" I wondered what the fuck was going on. I didn't know if that was an easyjet thing or a scouse airport thing 😆

2nd time was with Ryanair to Pisa where a delayed flight still arrived on time which was weird.

[Gonk]

10 hours ago, Winchester White said:

It is certainly a lot cheaper than Manchester.

Only flown from Liverpool twice, the first time was also my 1st experience of easyjet and when they gave me a laminated, reusable "boarding card" I wondered what the fuck was going on. I didn't know if that was an easyjet thing or a scouse airport thing 😆

2nd time was with Ryanair to Pisa where a delayed flight still arrived on time which was weird.

They are all at it nowadays. Push the arrival time out so delayed flights arrive on time and flights departing on time arrive early - looks great on their stats, and may avoid shelling out for really late departures

[Biggish Dave]

Split - that was a shit, crowded airport. To be fair, they were building a big extension which, if finished, will be a massive improvement.

[HowfenWHITES]

Santorini.

Small, always over crowded, hot and sweaty, shite food and drink options. 

Considering the number of tourists that pass through it every year you'd think they'd have the cash to upgrade. 

[Traf]

6 hours ago, HowfenWHITES said:

Santorini.

Small, always over crowded, hot and sweaty, shite food and drink options. 

Considering the number of tourists that pass through it every year you'd think they'd have the cash to upgrade. 

If they spent millions upgrading the airport, would more people go?
Unlikely

if they spent millions upgrading the airport, would it end up costing more to go there?
Probably

[HowfenWHITES]

15 hours ago, Traf said:

If they spent millions upgrading the airport, would more people go?
Unlikely

if they spent millions upgrading the airport, would it end up costing more to go there?
Probably

Both correct but I'm not suggesting a multi-million Manchester Airport T2 style upgrade, I mean just the basics, like air-con and access to water when its 40 degrees outside. 

It's certainly made me think twice about going again purely because of that experience. 

Or maybe we just caught it on a bad day!

[Youri McAnespie]

Entebbe.

[buckhurstwhite]

2 hours ago, Youri McAnespie said:

Entebbe.

Good shout that was a dump when I went through in the early 80's. You could see all the bullet holes following the Israeli raid. I believe it's been done up since then.

Still doesn't beat Mwanza across the lake, basically a hut with a tin roof and the beer was warm.

[Youri McAnespie]

2 hours ago, buckhurstwhite said:

Good shout that was a dump when I went through in the early 80's. You could see all the bullet holes following the Israeli raid. I believe it's been done up since then.

Still doesn't beat Mwanza across the lake, basically a hut with a tin roof and the beer was warm.

When in Rome, do as the Romans do...They do a cracking gourd of Mbege.

[Youri McAnespie]

Because of Kenyan involvement in Entebbe, Idi Amin, fat crocodile, fat bastard, had as many random Kenyans living in Uganda as they could find (345) rounded up and executed.

Nice chap.

And that Jock out of 'Shameless' still became his bum chum.

[Marc505]

Always find Manchester to be a sweaty stress pit.

Berlin Schonefeld was a nightmare, fucking miles out of the centre and then a trek once you actually got there. Could easily do 10,000 steps from entry to boarding at that place. I've not been through Brandenburg yet, any good?

Also, never believe your missus when she tells you Paris Beauvais Airport is in Paris. Nice enough airport like, but not after you've missed the only transfer coach of the day and spent £120 in a taxi to get there. Grim.

[Exiled Girl]

On 27/10/2021 at 10:49, Biggish Dave said:

Split - that was a shit, crowded airport. To be fair, they were building a big extension which, if finished, will be a massive improvement.

Last went through it in 2018, not crowded & was clean. Nothing spectacular, but functional with all the facilities you need.

[MancWanderer]

Today gave me a new perspective. It’s not always the airport. Used up the last of our credits from TUI to have a week in Gran Canaria. Utter joke coming back

Checking in about 400 folk who’ve all been dumped at the airport 2 hours before the flight takes off. Utter fucking carnage with so few check in desks open. All the extra documentation needed and families of mouth-breathers queuing up. Ended badly with a delay. Hope TUI got penalised for late departure and late arrival in Manc.

Been warned by @Trafin the past about them. He’s right 

[MickyD]

At Heraklion Airport the steps down from duty free are a mm or so different rise in the second step from the bottom.  You don't notice going up but it gets most people on the way back down. That passes an hour or so watching folk stumble down the final two steps.