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Before, during and after lockdown, Manny Road ASDA is the seventh circle of hell. I’d rather do my big shop in Abduls multi mart in downtown Damascus.

just a day for weirdos copying and pasting Churchill quotes for their facebook status

Cheers pal. Fantastic day had by me. Spent with the kids in the garden lad in full England kit, bbq, a few beers and the sun was shining. Back to the wage cage (now the desk in our bedroom) tomorrow.

funny but I was never Bulled even being small at school daughter was last year at school for being a Rug Muncher wife went to school it stopped for a bit theses where two LADs I picked her up we saw one of them I pulled up you Cunty ever speak or go near her again and -----I flicked a stwich and my boot opened you will end up in there now say sorry to her it stopped after that

Sounds a bit shit I know but I'm talking about adopting a team. I have to, I'm in Melbourne. You're right about Collingwood, a lot of hatred there. I can see Victoria Park, their traditional home from my balcony. The Nicky Winmar racism doesn't paint a great picture either. Anyway, described Bolton as a football club to an Aussie and he said North Melbourne should be my team. Arguably greatest ever player, Wayne Carey played for them. Also good at domestic violence, adultery and drug abuse according to Wikipedia. Your typical Aussie male then.

Believe it or believe it not, she appeared in club Same edition as Susan George no less The makers of on the buses did her no favours Put it this way, Leigh white would've shagged it

This place may be full of bickering nazis, commies, nipple and bumming obsessed shithouses, druggie thugs, alkies and all other normal members of society, but at least there’s no weirdos. In times of trouble and stress there’s only WWays that is worth a visit. I sincerely thank you all for the comments on here, the PMs and the texts. I personally know few of you but feel that I know a lot of you. The next few days will be horrendous as the MiL eventually departs this life. I pretty much ignore social and mainstream media at the moment so this place is the only place that I really visit to see what’s going on I will give one massive shout out to TMGJ. If you ever need someone in a crisis he’s your man. Cannot thank him enough for stuff he’s done for my mum recently. Absolutely top man

You’ve missed your vocation in life 👍🏼👍🏼 Look forward to tomorrow’s pre weekend bumper edition of swannys corona news

Positives? The Uk's first vaccine trial took place. (Elisa Graneto) no zombies recorded as of 9.10 B and Q have reopened, meaning husbands up and down the country now have to think creatively why they can't do DIY jobs around the house. A reporter who went missing in Wuhan, has reappeared..He deffo wasn't detained... Virus testing has got to a point where essential workers can now get tested... Doris aged 64 can now get tested and all she has to do is travel 24 miles! And there is talk that schools may return around the beginning of June Phased, if things continue.. Teachers up and down the country rejoice. In unrelated news.. wine sales have just risen... Deaths compared to this time last week is pretty level, which although 763 deaths is grim, it's pointing towards light at the end of the tunnel.

😃 I wasn't thinking straight, I just kind of got the red mist in front of my eyes and I just grabbed the monkey and hoyed it into the sea. 🐒

Should you need anything in those couple of weeks isolation, let us know. Even if it's an ale delivery.

Easier to test it in Scotland with a less dense, smaller population.. Agree with the part where she pointed out, any relaxed rules need to be able to be tightened immediately if need be.. People are already taking the mickey

I’m actually a sociopath

I couldn't believe how friendly they were. Very gentle and loving.

This. They will have been assessed and you should get the opportunity to meet/take it on a little walk before you're allowed to have it. We got a big lurcher from Bolton dogs home years ago, he walked in the house first time, sniffed around then just lay down and signed. As if a big wave of relief came over him and he was as good as gold. House trained and none destructive, didn't need too much walking, and could be left. Brilliant.

30% of Dalmatian dogs have deafness.

I am. There are many things that will have to change to enable a relaxation of the lockdown rules. Airlines have already said that the middle seat on planes will be left vacant. I can see restaurant’s having to reduce the number of tables and limiting to maybe 2 per table. Pubs will have to come up with similar arrangements if they want to open anytime before next year. Smaller shops will have to enforce similar procedures as supermarkets. Social distancing and probably masks will also continue for some time. Normality will not be what we are used to.

A bottle of old Rosie, steak pie in hobgoblin cooking. Quiet compared to previous years, but happy to embrace the positivity of England, my England

In answer to your question, lots do. There's loads of great dogs left abandoned in shelters because of idiot owners that either didn't put the time in, do their research or just changed their minds about owning a dog. You have to put more work into rescue dogs because many will have picked up behavioural issues - separation anxiety usually for one but the rewards are massive.

got to now and decided I'm going to tesco then I've got a box of cloudwater coming tomorrow so, I'm either going to address this on Sunday, although May 1st seems like a good day to change this new habit well May 3rd as that's a Sunday in any case, my first night without a beer is going to be a comedown to match that one in Trainspotting

Get the most savage looking unpredictable looking one...it can guard the chicks and earn it's keep fighting on the side. You might want to keep it in the shed though.

I posted that on here last week, pretty sure they’re all hers.

Wife’s a vet. If you want to keep her in business, get a french bulldog. She reckons they make more money fixing those insanely inbred fuck ups than any other animal. These cross breeds are ok, but difficult to train. Labrapaniels etc... Save yourself hassle and get a border collie if it’s exercise you’re after. Easy to train, very obedient, good looking and never tire. These other little fucking fashion accessories are shit. (Spider - former border collie owner, now owner of a Poochon. Whatever the fuck that is. Looks like something Bob Carolgees should have his fist up)

Check your local shelter mate, will be full of them needing a home.

Have you never had a pint of pink Cava with a peach schnapps and malibu chaser, yer big girl's bra?

Had a quick google about Mowbray as he was just before my time, found this recollection from a young Southport player who played against him, sort of backs up your memory. Mowbray, Henry Played for Southport Reserves against Mr Mowbray after I left school at 16 around 1971-72, he was playing for Bolton Wanderers 'A' team in the Lancashire League (2 steps down for him, from the first team) I was brought on as a sub and had better success than the previous young winger who I replaced. Mr Mowbray had been very complimentary to me after a couple of crosses, efforts at goal and a corner or two smiling and saying 'your good aren't you? 'After about the third or fourth time I had 'laced' him and nearly created a goal for our team, he turned to me, smiled and said if you do that again I'll break your f...king leg. As he was smiling when he said this, I was bemused and gave him a confused mid-puberty look, to which he replied 'now f..k off to the other wing'. Acting on reliable first hand information I duly obliged the experienced smiling Mr Mowbray. His information was more than valuable as I spent the remainder of the half in the more convivial company of the left winger of 'our' team, who spoke to me incessantly saying 'go back to your own wing'. After the game I was interrogated by the manager and more experience old pro's Alan Taylor (ex-Blackpool goalkeeper) and Sandy Brown (ex-Everton defender) why I vacated a position where I was having such success against a reputable rugged 1st Division defender who hadn't been able to get near me. I had to admit I had been threatened by this beast of a man (10 years older than me with hairs coming out of his nostrils and ears, and thigh muscles like tree trunks) smiling at me and threatening to do me harm, (at my tender age and boyish physical stature - 5ft 5in & size 5 shoe!) I basically 'shit' myself and run. The manager and older pro's howled laughing at my predicament and advised me I had fell for the oldest 'con' trick in the book, and that was for Mr Mowbray to have an easy game and not look bad. Needless to say I never got 'bullied' out of a game again and learn't not to listen to what other players said to me. Thanks Henry, you didn't break my leg! but taught me the power of words, but I learnt the meaning of the saying 'actions speak louder than words' The good old 70's eh!

Always love it as its my birthday too. I'm finding a larger than usual amount of people falling into lh whites view. Usually people who go mad celebrating St Patrick's day. It's not a crime to be proud of the country of your birth. Crack on and celebrate St paddies too if you want. They are yet another excuse to have a booze up!

Good video for people who haven't seen it , and ignore the first 20 seconds. Boiling hot day , I was behind the control room thing on the right , so didn't see what was happening till there lot charged on.

There's loads from the last two seasons who I couldn't name now.

You'd have to take your utd shirt off to get there first...

Lesbeen Lesbean Lecben lesbien fook it... Rug muncher..

Good to see you pal. When lockdown ends we should get out on the bike and have a pint on the way back, Plough’s good last stop for a beer to refresh.

Got my order in for cherry tree Sunday lunch, had enough of cooking these last few weeks.

Positives.. NHS hasn't collapsed There are spare beds on wards and ICU's. Social distancing appears to be working on the whole. People are getting better at following instructions Fuel Prices are low The Governments plans are working albeit with some hiccups and mistakes along the way. We have a new leader of the opposition who might actually do something for his 150k a year I'm getting a shed delivered next week so can hide away in there away from the missus The media are getting called out day after day for shite reporting The numbers dying seem to be on a slow decline, even though this is only a representation of hospital deaths and care homes are really struggling. Freeze factory are selling McDonald's chicken nuggets! Some positives for you.

Remember seeing the Chelsea game on the evening news the one were we were 3 nil up and got beat 4 -3 thought that might of been itv though . emailed these guys website qpr dvd though for the worthington goal there might be a chance they might have a copy . This one is a Bolton game around that time not sure on the year

759 have died today but on the bright side it makes Liverpool less likely to win the league and Leeds less likely to be promoted not that they would have travelled beyond Stalybridge anyway

Wanderersways : let's debate it for several hours then look at some pictures of tits

Hancock calls briefing, says we've created world-saving vaccine... BBC: Will you apologise for not creating it sooner? ITV: Isn't it true that it contains dead kittens? C4: Why didn't you join an EU vaccination scheme? Sky: You said creating a vaccine would be difficult, do you now accept that you weren't telling the truth? Buzzfeed: 37 reasons why the UK is still a shit country Independent: Isn't it true that austerity stopped the vaccine being made sooner? Guardian: Vaccines are racist

I’ve put much much worse shit into my bloodstream than any vaccine. I AM IN

I find parents can sometimes be the problem; as mentioned, it's learned behaviour. There are some self righteous pricks who think little Johnny, or Jemima would do no wrong... I'm presently in a situation where my lad took a bit of beating off a girl who has long been unruly, but refused to fight back. This girls parent has come out a proclaimed she is the victim because she was standing up to a bully who pushed another boy over! Transpires my lad and another have ran into each other during a rugby match in PE. The story has been confirmed by a parent and member of staff who witnessed it, but still accepts no responsibility. Both kids were punished to differing extents- my lad for not being careful kept in for one break, the girl all week and threatened with expulsion. School clamped down on it immediately, and dealt with it harshly but fairly in my opinion. All three kids were friends the next day, as is their nature. Let's hope it ends there.