Moderators Zico Posted December 15, 2020 Moderators Share Posted December 15, 2020 yeah, should start the reply with "To be honest, I've had a tough time lately, drinking heavily, not sleeping well, feeling pretty down. Makes you wonder what the point is anymore. Anyway, let's schedule our video call for 3pm Thursday. If I'm still here" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Not in Crawley Posted December 15, 2020 Share Posted December 15, 2020 Today I have video calls from 9am-6pm with a 30 minute break. The last one ended early thankfully. Its got to the point I have to book time in to actually do some work. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Rudy Posted December 15, 2020 Members Share Posted December 15, 2020 28 minutes ago, Not in Crawley said: I know its not as importat as laying cones out, but someone has got to do it. 😂 you bitch Many moons ago the work Christmas doo email came round, I clicked on my mates name to reply to him “ Hope ***** is going, last year it looked like she was having a right said Fred tribute act in her dress” Pressed reply to all. I saw my career going down the swanny. Luckily she thought it was hilarious, nothing came of it other than a bit of banter and a yearly reminder, usually accompanied with a I’m too sexy video Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
little whitt Posted December 15, 2020 Share Posted December 15, 2020 up till a few years ago id not a clue how to send one i could Reply to them but not a bastard clue how to send one work wise Email or Text its always Regards Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Site Supporter Cheese Posted December 15, 2020 Site Supporter Share Posted December 15, 2020 (edited) When I was an apprentice, I made a "Your mum" joke in response to an email from another apprentice (it was a "thing" at the time). A split second after I pressed send, I remembered his mum had died a couple of weeks earlier. I phoned him to apologise and he seemed ok about it, but it still makes me sweat when I think of it now and then. Anyway, I end my emails with "Regards," or "Cheers,". Depends on the topic and/or who I'm sending it to. Edited December 15, 2020 by Cheese Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Traf Posted December 15, 2020 Share Posted December 15, 2020 2 hours ago, DazBob said: Must admit, I do hate it when someone starts an email with "Hi Dazbob, how are you?" So as not to be a rude cunt, one has to reply, "I'm good thanks, hope you are you too?" Even if I was going through the shittest time ever, the reply is always "I'm good thanks". Waste of fucking time. Just get on with what you wanted me for in the first place. You'd be OK with my emails then. They go along the lines of.. Nobhead, Send me that report from yesterday. Traf Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Duck Egg Posted December 15, 2020 Share Posted December 15, 2020 A colleague at my last place had a serious BO problem. He comes in one morning and the lass sat next to him emails her mate "Bob smells worse than ever today" and of course sends it to Bob in error. That caused some shenanigans. I got told off several years ago for the out of office reply I left on when we were out on strike. Something along the lines of "I'm on strike today defending jobs and services. Any internal emails sent today wont be read and will be deleted on my return" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Site Supporter Spider Posted December 15, 2020 Site Supporter Share Posted December 15, 2020 1 minute ago, Duck Egg said: A colleague at my last place had a serious BO problem. He comes in one morning and the lass sat next to him emails her mate "Bob smells worse than ever today" and of course sends it to Bob in error. That caused some shenanigans. I got told off several years ago for the out of office reply I left on when we were out on strike. Something along the lines of "I'm on strike today defending jobs and services. Any internal emails sent today wont be read and will be deleted on my return" I bet Bob smelled better from then on though. Job done Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ani Posted December 15, 2020 Share Posted December 15, 2020 1 hour ago, little whitt said: up till a few years ago id not a clue how to send one i could Reply to them but not a bastard clue how to send one work wise Email or Text its always Regards Pretty sure the actual content of your messages will be more of an issue than the salutation. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators Horwich Posted December 15, 2020 Moderators Share Posted December 15, 2020 Best, Horwich x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Not in Crawley Posted December 15, 2020 Share Posted December 15, 2020 44 minutes ago, Ani said: Pretty sure the actual content of your messages will be more of an issue than the salutation. Not if its Many thanks and go fuck yourself NiC Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Site Supporter Spider Posted December 15, 2020 Site Supporter Share Posted December 15, 2020 Hi <some cunt> Message May the seed of your loins be fruitful in the belly of your woman Spider Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adlington Trotter Posted December 15, 2020 Share Posted December 15, 2020 The thing that winds me up is when someone will write three paragraphs describing an issue they have, then simply end the email with "please advise". A very none subtle way of batting the problem off to someone else. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Not in Crawley Posted December 15, 2020 Share Posted December 15, 2020 1 hour ago, Spider said: Hi <some cunt> Message May the seed of your loins be fruitful in the belly of your woman Spider That'd be a pointless sign off in my.line of work Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Site Supporter Spider Posted December 15, 2020 Site Supporter Share Posted December 15, 2020 6 minutes ago, Not in Crawley said: That'd be a pointless sign off in my.line of work May the seed of your loins be spaffed into the upper colon of half of Shaftesbury Avenue Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Not in Crawley Posted December 15, 2020 Share Posted December 15, 2020 3 minutes ago, Spider said: May the seed of your loins be spaffed into the upper colon of half of Shaftesbury Avenue Thats more like it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Site Supporter Spider Posted December 15, 2020 Site Supporter Share Posted December 15, 2020 Just now, Not in Crawley said: Thats more like it. Is that what you say when they’re done? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Underpants Posted December 15, 2020 Share Posted December 15, 2020 I sent an email to the organisers of the UK Ironkids this week. It was an inquiry about the 2021 event (2020 was cancelled). It was only one sentence and wasn't sure how to finish it. Ended up just leaving my name. Anyway, if it goes ahead I reckon I've got a good chance of winning it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
green genie Posted December 15, 2020 Share Posted December 15, 2020 7 hours ago, Not in Crawley said: Today I have video calls from 9am-6pm with a 30 minute break. The last one ended early thankfully. Its got to the point I have to book time in to actually do some work. Swear the directors are playing Tetris with my calendar. On a brighter note I have patent pending for headphones that deliver an electric shock on demand in Zoom. Peter Jones will be all over it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dimron Posted December 15, 2020 Share Posted December 15, 2020 I usually sign my emails off as the Reverent Blessed Doctor Mohammed Agabi along with my Bitcoin account details Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bolton in bedford Posted December 15, 2020 Share Posted December 15, 2020 10 hours ago, jules_darby said: "I hope you are well" 🤯🤯🤯 Most of the time it’s followed with something you really don’t want to read. I hope you are well because you won’t be soon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Escobarp Posted December 15, 2020 Share Posted December 15, 2020 Ive actually paid attention today to what people’s opening lines are on emails. majority of those that have come from Externals have been I hope you are well or I trust this e-mail finds you well. had one - apologies for the e-mail. no you’re not you lying cunt or you wouldn’t have sent it. internals it’s more straight to the point - have you finished cleaning that van yet or can you put a magic tree air freshener in please. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jules_darby Posted December 15, 2020 Share Posted December 15, 2020 2 minutes ago, Escobarp said: had one - apologies for the e-mail. Back when I used to sell I used to "apologise for the impersonal email" What a ridiculously British notion! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stevieb Posted December 15, 2020 Share Posted December 15, 2020 28 minutes ago, Dimron said: I usually sign my emails off as the Reverent Blessed Doctor Mohammed Agabi along with my Bitcoin account details When are you going to send me 10 bitcoin back? A good one I had when a load of people left through redundancy a few years ago we had a spate of company wide round Robins 'long goodbyes'. A lad I worked with was getting pissed off with em and replied to a Terry's particularly long long goodbye...."alas we're merely ships in the night Terry having never crossed paths in your 20 years in the business" Followed up by Terry... "we've been on the same project and in weekly meetings for the last 6 months" Warmest regards Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
miamiwhite Posted December 15, 2020 Share Posted December 15, 2020 12 minutes ago, Escobarp said: Ive actually paid attention today to what people’s opening lines are on emails. majority of those that have come from Externals have been I hope you are well or I trust this e-mail finds you well. had one - apologies for the e-mail. no you’re not you lying cunt or you wouldn’t have sent it. internals it’s more straight to the point - have you finished cleaning that van yet or can you put a magic tree air freshener in please. Can't wait to send you an email now mate.....Will start with 'Greetings, my festive friend" 🎄 🦌 ❄ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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